There’s a certain repetitious stupidity and stubbornness to my perceived writing or creative blocks – I perceive a creative stasis and stagnation over the same old shit (SAMO© AS AN ALTERNATIVE TO BOOSH WAH-ZEE FANTASIES… THINK) The same old shit – the same damn fears – I write those fears every time – a lack of flexibility to approach, a fear of experiment and making ugly, fear of cringe and embarrassment – these continually plague me I recall the performance of the spiral notebook: this simplicity, the ubiquitous paper made unfamiliar as a sound machine, a music instrument, a jar of mayonnaise… Fuck rigid old wineskin chronological process (I’m sure I have written this before, my repetitious stupidity and tedious foolishness) and open flexible new wineskin kairos process: prophetic contaminated time process and messianic kingdom of the skies time process I will probably write this again but I must until I drink OPEN DESERT desert swarms and desert crowds multiple wolves hyenas OPEN OCEAN MAPS RHIZOMES
Two spiral-bound notebooks lay brick bodies in open ocean Two spiral notebooks boat bodies bourbon open ocean book sound watersun music Water sun spiral fountain music
I copy the entirety of the universe in two A5 size spiral notebooks
I sometimes (often?) treat my writing monomania too seriously , as if I write new scripture to a new religion – and I do write a new religion but remember this religion contains the absurd, the play, the pun, the rhizomic ridiculousness
Two spiral bound notebooks whir wind up bird black box nag hammadi Spiral spills spanner body horror: ben book spirals Ben book spirals spill bay blood (a curve or a plane that winds around a fixed center in a continuously increasing or decreasing distance from the point) I prepare the notebook holy spirit spiral / curve cudgel slant space plane Plane rain spiral plant curve fold paper / forms of paper Plane paper rain figure sound flesh regular nad contact microphones I manipulate paper into spiral heavy use of repetition Thick paper sheets and cardboard thundersheets shuttle spirals Paper thunder tube and paper umbrella spiral umbra underneath body nautilus Paper nautilus swell nag hammadi / I prepare paper desert distortions washer and dryer
I prepare the notebook non and none name: now her name intense nautilus Her name sound spiral SOUNDS SPIRALS / detour dune doublings Detune dune doublings Steve Reich doubled voices with clarinet at the unison Notebook hear spiral now prepared sound: sound spiral sheets of sound shed boatshed I prepare pure sound notebook (prepared sound: prepared piano prepared guitar laptop guitar tabletop guitar detour lapdance radio)
I wrestle with notebook and I wrestle language despite chastising my writing paralysis earlier – SAME OLD SHIT Fuck it – I rewrite the wrestle again and again I repeat and rewrite the process because this is process Process, event in the poem
The poet’s homeland is the poem and caught from one poem to the next
I pray the poem I pray the poem porous process and process aporia Plane process paper spiral I play the poem pharmakon and pharmacy flatter healing landscape Poem open ocean ossia serpent Serpent shutoff shifts then eon an ran set pan and plasma propulsions Serpent play population pneumobara barotrauma they look like people (You think I’m one of them. Tie me up. Because yes, it’s really scary to trust you right now, but that’s what this is, so trust me because I trust you) (May I ask something your grateful for about me or our friendship? I ask Asia. I’m grateful that you have a broad and flexible idea of what spirituality is and what it can be, she says. You played an integral part in broadening my own ideas of spirituality. And it’s not just your personal ideas; you are very knowledgeable of the different histories and philosophies that exist and have existed in the past, says Asia)
Now called Athingani, they live in Phyrgia and are neither Hebrews nor Gentiles. They keep the Sabbath but are not circumcised. They will not touch any man. If food is offered to them, they will asked for it to be placed on the ground; then they come and take it. They give to others with the same precautions.
I keep the sabbath but I continue writing I transgress the Sabbath and I prophesy mutilators of the flesh paper body horror (if this picture doesn’t make your skin crawl… IT’S ON TOO TIGHT) I prophesy spiral serpent and several processes polar skulls Serpent shift sabbath eon an ran shiftlets and singlets clangorously languages
Two spiral notebooks nude / two spiral notebooks naked Naked notebook noun states accents on air (neighbor, window, happenings, negotiations) Noun notebooks near face fire neon: my hands hold halo radioactive
One or more actions for the right hand right hand risk funnel runnel rhizome and hand tent train turtle fountain One or more actions for the right hand: one or more actions for the left hand Hand hews hand: hand hex hand hard haxan Hand hews hard word haxan haft hue hare Hand hand hard beware air Beware air hand aether: hand action hardbop animal Band action body horror hardbop: beetlejuice knife jammed jewel beetle jazz Hand an and anima mundi math action (Actions by Krzysztof Penderecki and Don Cherry) (Humus the life exploring force) (Actions for free jazz orchestra)
In its original version “(idle) – 51 THINGS TO DO WITH 2 HANDS” was a companion to the notebook “Moving Whole Heart” (2011) by Eileen Myles. The version presented here treats it as a duo piece in its own right
Two hands inhabit two hands Two hands inhabit two hands the marriage of heaven and hell Two hands inhabit two hands beauty will be convulsive or not at all Now Nadja and now Nadja gnosis asia among rivers (because in Prussian it’s the beginning of the word hope and because it’s only the beginning) I adore the name Nadja and I adore the name Asia: her name shimmers mushroom light and bagatelle bakelite (Don’t I love her? When I am near her I am near things near her)
Hand hinge hypothalamus Hand hinges two hands inhabit hellgrammite granite Two hands hellgrammite mortar son of man I hymn son of man happenstance hellgrammite granite / metamorphic rock hallucinogic hellgrammite globster Hellgrammite hemorrhage hemicreeper Hellgrammite hemoglobin hobgoblin hemichodate (my hands goregrind gill slit and my speech staggers structures similar to a notochord) (my hands pornogrind immunoglobulins glass glut other omnisexual cathedrals omnivorous porous Christianities)
I hedgeclip hyperrealism porous hyperpyrexia / hobo crossing hibernaculum
I cross serpent ocean sharp sails shift eon an run pan gold long language Pale nail pan gold god languorous language
Language low lost last language Language lowland lost highway languages: I linger in these languages Languages kingfishers catch fires fires within fires I draw flame fast fisticuffs stations of the cross I dry flame dry orgasms / overlapping scriptures Scripture overlap striptease tasmanian devil desert seraph spirals Spiral seraph stone ring / bow swung finds tongue to fling further fires Spiral serpents elves goes itself in speaks and spells Spiral serpent stereo write a book that contains a hipper repertoire, a more contemporary repertoire Stone ring seraph spirals mimic the spiral-bound coffee stained fake book used by jazz musicians
Spiral strands spiral skyscraper sprawl scribe book spiral Book spiral spy stochastic sprawl all sheets of sound Sound selves Books car spiral crescent cypress Sound low language loud contradicts
Rabbi Meir of Rothenberg writes:
Question: Is it not the liturgical poet who first writes that clay vessels in which leaven was cooked must be broken before Passover, and then states that they may be stored away in wooden sheds, guilty of contradiction?
Answer: It is the poetic liberty to state together two contradictory propositions.
All I write coalesces in contradiction All I write continues contradictions and contradictions camp cavities discontinuous chasms: her crayon campus canyon I never complete contradiction but leap discontinuous jump canyon desert and canyon creeps pigment pink jazz jam / jam runs free and surrender pink steam Surrender pink steam pink shears contradictions / corpse cut by clock tower scissors Pink soothsays contradiction and I absurd abound children of strangers I blue straw stratocasters (I dismantle Top Thrill Dragster what a drip and dippermouth dream) Contradiction noseslides 50-50 grind Christian crypt: I line the catacombs with scripts of magic prayers and drawn chalk amulets
I reimagine the amulet as an actor / actions for the left hand and actions for the right hand An actor getting shot by a machine gun / add tape with plastic bag attached to cloth with plate on skin Add tape untitled film stills / I look away from the camera and outside the frame Untitled film stills finger slices spirit cinema I look camera away from the camera monster mash machines werewolves of london Add tape office girl bombshell girl on the run housewife Add tapes copies without originals: originals ordinals cardinals Old crows young cardinals look away from the camera towards spirals Add tape getting shot by a machine gun imaginary magazine glimpses into the role of an imaginary blonde actress She’s good enough to be a real actress (I’m good enough to be a real writer)
I photograph poiesis – no, I pluck poiesis lake light luke light light lucy / lucky in the sky with diamonds dalliance with lucy the Australopithecus I play poiesis the activity in which benjamin brings something to being that did not exist before, and before buffers bison versus buffalo Water buffalo buffalo woman buffalo gals won’t you come out tonight and dance by the light of the moon Poiesis bringing forth physics emergence Poiesis brings forth emergent physical flesh and I write the threshold occipital bone, the erotic ekstasis I write threshold ascension: John Coltrane’s Ascension repeats ascension alchemy and ascension anticipations / architrave astrophysics cicada allotropes I repeat ascension multiple poiesis
Add tape with plastic bag ball python bagatelles Plastic bag burgundy plastic arts brisk beach bleach (when the stones crash I hear the thunder clash) Plastic bag attached against articulated body agon
I Speak Spiral Spirit Notebook Song
I watch a performance of Mark So’s “(idle) – 51 THINGS TO DO WITH TWO HANDS, for Eileen Myles.” 2010, performed by Hoven Chasse and Matt Hannafen, and recorded live at the extradition Series, Portland, OR, USA, September 15, 2018.
For this piece, two spiral-bound notebooks are prepared ahead of the performance, with instructions indicating various simple actions of 51 page spreads: rubbing, tapping, scratching, thrumming, etc – one or more actions for the left hand, one or more actions for the right hand, plus occasionally murmuring. In addition, the being the scores, the notebooks are also the instruments on which the music is played.
Notebooks now scripture Notebooks now scripture spiral nonspiral bridal chamber (cutaway of a nautilus shell showing the chamber arranged in an approximate logarithmic spiral) (cutaway catenary car chase skull channel) Spiral notebook spirit spirals sculptured staircase scriptures Spiral notebook spiral scripture searches spiral non nonscripture striptease Spiral none then spiral now word and non word Now word bird word spiral sound / bird bird bird bird’s the word
I speak spirals I speak spiral spirit notebook song
Notebooks now scripture straw draw strong sorcery Notebooks now name scripture scraping landscape serpents
Notebook now scripture dream talking drum desert (I dream notebook liturgical drama and mystery play)
Notebook now nude experiment (I experiment spiral shit show I spiral experiment shit show sideshow circus counterclockwise Circus counterclockwise summer circus ape simulations Great ape simulated baboon ben adam
I dislike this notebook section – I love the idea of notebook as both instruction and instrument / performance, and the Book too contains both the instruction and the performance / reconstruction by the reader I don’t know what to do with this notebook and with this spiral but I will keep sharpening notebook sheets of sounds holy spirit spit split shit show I interrupt the notebook to study other monsters
Montage monsters Montage monsters collision of independent slots and shots Each sequential element not neighbor side by side but impact and collapse on top of each other Monster soviet film montage theory thumbtack then thumbscrew absurdity Monster thunder insects incisor montage goat milk or yak milk Montage insect mammary memory a moving camera covers space continuously Continuous space monster insects indigo camera montage movement nowhere (nowhere notebook none spiral) My mind montages monster measurement / meter stick closet monster pocket experiments (my monstrous failed experiments) (my experimental monster excrement excess monsters) My mind mingles moths with monsters in montage (a bowl of soup a girl in a coffin a woman of a divan) I experiment assembling fragments of pre-existing film from the Tsarist film industry
I write as performance and I often visit the cross I perform Book and notebook you are the one who writes and the one who is written I perform at the threshold of the Book and you shall be in the Book I write Book or die
I watch a performance and I often visit the cross written I visit the cross write ben body dreaming bruises startle response spirals
Spirals surprise me swimming Spirals survive artificial intelligence wrapped in human intestines Spirals sing Julien Baker’s Something and I know I meant nothing nothing to you but I thought I meant something something something but I just said nothing nothing, said nothing sat and watched you drive away
I spiral through Julius Eastman A Mighty Fortress Is Our God and Be Thou My Vision
Notebook and body whip and the body spiral striptrease
Notebook nota cambiata cambrian explosion chaconne Chaconne cycle spiral spider insect exoskeleton stairs
Insects eat notebooks and I abandon body for monster apparitions
I perform the notebook as a name I participate in the notebook as my name and her name: name multiplies machine maps bodies microphones Notebook bodies sounds louds lights sights bursts sounds
Notebook announces itself in dream: notebook announces dream in dream
I build notebook as the Book and Book boxing babel rhizome river bank
I participate in the Book Book apophatic performance / You dream of having a place in the book, and right away, you become a word shared by eyes and lips I dream of Book and Books, and I dream of library and libraries I dream the notebook as library of babel impossible body gesture I gesture Book and notebook ground and gods I dream not a place in the Book but the ben body adam Book itself
I watch the Book and I light the Book as a torch body burning I watch the Book nick word witch wild: wild Book and I work the Book nude body porno play party (real raw truth about man-smuggling inside the big house for women: WOMEN’S PRISON) Notebook bath bey body black iron prison but blood brings book bald eagle eucharist isle son of man body mingle
I cut the Book open and my body emerges egg eye easel erotic
I dream the Book different dreams and several dreams The dream seeps my skull steppe strata blood body skulls
My skull simmers circle psychoses My skull skip stone ironwork stir insect marmalade Insect mixture wing stone skull stem body turnip Skull ironworks steelworks neon neurosis Neurosis neodada dirge or scourge insect swarms Swarm skull stick insect cat cradle bog body bog body cradle curdle body circle cut cricket spiral cut Body curds and whey wind whip ben adam blast furnace
Skull hundreds hysterics hangar hoplite skull hundreds hypnosis hyperpop neurosis: a global comparison between a sock and a vagina a scar and a castration Scar crash castration drowned world ballard bodies break or rupture across her din den body clock bubonic plague rat king haggle hassle hangman son of man Haggle haggle hagfish hangman helios child of humanity Human rhinoceros horn human unicorn horn anvil east hastings
I grasp the skin of my skull erotic as the multiplicity of pores porous her hair grape clusters cloisters Porous her hair clusters pomegranate cloisters super massive black hole pore pour black plague blast furnace body Blast body furnace fix fuck exoskeleton Insect sock erotic had the multiplicity of stitches Stitch strikes body erotic insect assembly rush My body assembles the multiplicity of little cavities a pure aggregate of stitches to a field of vaginas Aggregates alligators stitches circles skull vagina vise key field stitches Vaginal vision virgin queen earthquake Queen queer earthquake musics: musics machines ben body ben body metal machine music (There is no greater mistake than the presupposition that a true originality is a mere matter of impulse or inspiration… To originate, is carefully, patiently, and understandingly, combine)
I combine queer conic / absurd cartoon Book I combine stations of the cross surreal skull crucifixion Skull sorts Robert Rauschenberg combines crow canyon skull
I assemble neurotic other the written past with no mirror I assemble animal burrow or starcraft bunker I compare goosebumps to a field of tiny rhinoceros horns and lighting field harpoons my body ill electrons ambient surges The lightning field / sculpted human heads Marble sculpture shrunken head son of man / productive participation involves appropriation and reappropriation of the familiar
I assemble my flesh familiar neurosis then unfamiliar fanged noumena Maps montage monsters molecular multiplicities hole whole psychosis Silver sliver sin serpent coil pythagorean comma corpse pyramids I dream about six or seven wolves in a tree and draw five words wolve karst landscape violence Wolves kick kraftwerk khora I work khora empty and isolated wolf body My body wolves words wall worship Body worship body performance cut up Piss Christ porous erotic cross Cross works words wild twelve taryn wilderness Wolves work hora koloss cramped space body spill spinal spigot Cord work word wild bandit body boulder shoulder blade wall wolves worship / I worship woman and I worship her word wolf Wolf tone taryn tetragrammaton timbre modulation mutated tonic
Tonic Taryn Sonic the Hedgehog / Hedgehog hagar the horrible motherfucker Sonic the Hedgehog sonya blade bog breath buffoonery big word wolf dog frog barricade bog frog zombie barricade oh calcutta Netherworld nude narcotic or body naked names cocaine blowjob blowjob blue whale weird wolf wail begins blowhole harmony: oh baby beluga oh baby beluga Baboon beluga whale wolf boogie nights before midnights The wolf hides in the clock corkscrew midnight
Five flays my flesh wolf devour and the Roman numeral V signifiers the erotic spreading of a woman’s legs Legs open luscious light light lenticular body wall of mirrors matterhorn dark matter matador Massive mathematics matte black body supermassive black hole Flesh fulcrum cross friction fractional derivative dark matter desert Multiple wolves multiple deserts / desert rigid erotic Desert rough rhythm riptide / diving bell diamond
Wolves watch the dreaming Wolves match the dreaming watchmen tell us of the night what its signs and promises are Wolves dream drift the cross that castrates You can’t be one wolf but you’re always eight or nine wolves six or seven wolves Wolves repeat wolves whip and the body repetition red rhizomes I shape wolf wings in iron and steel I begin Book as wolf or a dream I begin Book as drift drip dream golden mean
I evoke the book and provoke the questions
I evoke the book notebook now scripture I evoke book earth eye erotic / guinnevere has green eyes
The Bella Moth Demonstrates Complex Mating Strategies
I experiment as much to do with light as with sound and I shoot sound prophecy I shoot sound thrown oral torah taryn saturation sandpaper Sandpaper eyedropper egg drop soup language Drop language drop art mail art math myth (this myth I machine from raw aluminum This myth I manufacture from iron ore) (A creation myth which paradoxically mythologizes human creation) I make myth like I make book or house: a long body experiment Long body experiment spiral staircase banister bastard body building labyrinth Body bridge building labyrinth book I leave to the various futures (not to all) my garden of forking paths
Flesh forks garden fuck floating body Fuck floating body texas chainsaw massacre Massacre mass black angels anvil forked tongue futures Piano sonata white mass muscle bow mix body maximum
I leave to various futures – and perhaps to all futures – my book my body my blood texts torahs blessingways Body book blessing the path through the rose garden (What is rose? Assembly of Israel Assembly assemblages the collage of roses) (garden manuscript and garden palimpsest) Forked paths play ghost lights and ship roses
Fluorescent light randomly divided over blue background/ the image decays as the film is executed many times over… Fades were applied over this end result
Fluorescent light fork letter Fluorescent light fork lift letter Lift life light lamina lateral fluorescent fore Light and letter experiment: this is where time becomes space / this is where space becomes light I lower lights city by the light divided I lower light illustrated letters illuminated letters glow glow radio Glow radio slow travel oral torah Taryn torah speaks wheel divided fluorescent light and she lights the light She lights the light lamppost letters body blue background light Blue body light fields have ears (constellation, monarch, canyon)
I read Division By Zero by Ted Chiang and I meditate on my own monomania: the writing, the written, the Book, the Word, as inevitably all my creative efforts circle chords sword through the circle of the cross The zero stalks the zone of zebra The zero mimics the xylophone of the Danse Macabre melted into the skeleton dance and I choreograph zebra The zero scubas zebra scrubbed sponge coral colony / the zero zebra submarine cloud ultramarine Zebra zippers cave north benjamin and I rhyme everything with the zygomatic machine my muffled mandible
The zebra as Kindred kidnaps me Zebra zero zipper teeth telos: telos turpentine mine omega point approach both directions at once, all zeros and zero I rewrite the zero in my imaginary remix of myth and mathematics and the zero telos terminal spikes statics and the zero telos terminal spiked speaking wheel sparking wheel I conjure a strange mathematical myth and although I often fail to realize mathematical objects geometrically, I pin and point lines and points clockwise walk piano zebra I improvise and jam geometry a melodic surplus of cusps, singularities, intersections, zeros and their sharp corners tab my brain lovecraftian non-euclidean hound monstrosities
I rewrite the zero with several complex singularities, or the variety of complex singularities: removable singularities, movable singularities, essential singularities, isolated singularities, and they syzygy the written field zero Complex zero Total zero zebra
I embrace the contradiction and I do not resolve the contradiction but I surrender to the contradiction writing the contradiction The contradiction write the contradictions in inconsistent inconsistencies: inconsistent initiations and inconsistent incarnations
If I try to strive for rigor and consistency, the cross of Christ crucifies any attempt at rigor or consistency Christina the cross across cross arcs crucifixion contradictions Contradictions catch fire body frictions daily irrational horrors (Can you see them, Sally… hiding in the shadows – they’re alive, Sally. They want you to be one of them when the lights go out. DON'T BE AFRAID OF THE DARK a story of something not human)
I approach dark body improvisation contact microphones Approximate dark improvise body insect microphones
The bella moth also demonstrates complex mating strategies and is thus an excellent model to study sexual selection… Females mate multiply and receive spermaphores containing sperm, nutrients, and alkaloid compounds from numerous males as nuptial gifts… Female choose males according to the intensity of the courtship pheromone, hydroxy dai dal, and carry out a sperm selection process after copulation with various females…
I bring bells I bring bells and I bring birds who put bella down the wych elm ben body vibrates bell blonde the remains of a hand found some distance from the tree Bells blonde the tree of life upside down wedding dress I dress to impress impressions of a clear dental pattern I bottle bells bell numbers bell polynomials / polyamorous courtship crack compact holster hipbone pheromone Holster hipbone trombone pheromone
I smell bomb bells swell blonde bell cluster witches: I witch word hand of glory lord of hosts hospice hostages telephone hospital rain pit bodies I rind jazz jellyfish bell disco human flesh: flesh smoke pheromones human sausage
Blonde bell swells serene waves suffer Serene waves suffer a wave of strength and light Voices of children accompany gentle bells
Ocean over spans Spaniards excellent fir entropy technical death metal Techne links poeisis day dark sea urchin underneath then vermilion Dash gash vermilion molts incomplete metamorphosis mothlight Body bell magma metamorphosis panic velvet photons Panic velvet velveteen rabbit photons: paper photography graphomania Photography graphomania nail pornography (OVER-EXPOSED she was forced to commit the lowest acts because a hidden camera saw too much) Vermilion pornography exposed procoelus camera erotic from inkpot
Inkpot play moth sensation toxemia tetragrammaton Toxemia tesseract Taryn tessellation tetragrammaton bells / tetragrammaton tintinnabuli Erotic daydreaming shanties chew yarn Yahweh chantilly ace loose mothlight Bell light yarn bomb all Yahweh blonde allwhen
Erotic bella moth evacuation Erotic pheromone evacuation emanate human face she flowers / dandelion spontaneous human combustion
Their wings range in color from yellow, red, pink, and orange to white Wings contain white bands six bands of irregularly spaced black spots The hind wings can be bright pink with a marginal blue band
I study more color: blonde clamshell color Color lent collect clipper charcoal I study more color: color crisp butterfly wings (monarch butterfly field has ears Monarch butterfly record groove cut grove canyon) Radio color condensed into insect swarms: television color coalesces into locust famine light
I like light and colors crash my skull microraptor radiation / Philip K. dick pink light moth lasers
Yellow light layers yards Leaves of grass scrolls through the yard of blonde girls Yellow links yellow unlevel light and yellow spills sporadic / yellow space lustre Yellow lunary lands lead light yellow / I yellow large glass lithographics
Red light rains free red Red reacts rapid red my face route light bloody red Red relaxes rain red Asia among rivers and Asia among insects (When I was a kid, says Asia, I went to an entomology museum in New Orleans. I saw walking leaf insects for the first time and a pink katydid. The walking leafs were on a bush in a short acrylic rectangular enclosure – you could walk all the way around it. I remember looking at it and thinking “the leaves are blowing in the wind” then immediately thinking “Wait a minute… There is no wind…” and discovering they were bugs! I was amazed, says Asia)
A rare red radio light lagoon / reopen red ratio Rare red rock river rib cage cage carve canyon
Pink print porno photo (The rungs on his ladder to success were women’s bodies. He was using them and smashed them – all but one THE SEX PLAN) Pink pilot pink plain pink pitch pink proof Pink pint drink plant phase antler pink animations Pink piano charlemagne palestine strumming music
My orange pupil spills omega point orange grove Obese orange spills obvious orange pipe organ animal fun orange restless Orange octaves oscillate synthetic scales and mystic chord monsters Orange interval orange eye orbits
White light wing word woman insects White light loop wing logos god woman insect side slices (There is apparently an exhibit in Montreal that displays insects by color, says Asia. Look at this Sonic OC ass looking bug, she says. Look at those FOOTS. Called a blood spewer. Little guy spits when he’s upset. Gonna have to draw him later, says Asia).
I copy this quote from Ted Chiang’s Hell Is The Absence of God, page 189: … if [people] wish to love God, they [must] be prepared to do so no matter what what is intentions. God is not just, God is not kind, God is not merciful, and understanding that is essential to true devotion…
I once prepared myself for such devotion, but now I hesitate I hesitate and then desist because the continual and repeated dark night of the soul (soul and skull) produce much anguish and rarely produces spiritual development or progress The dark fucks frequent crucifixion without resurrection Nevertheless, the Cross always beckons / ascent beckons and descent beckons I often visit the Cross
The Cross: ben reembraces upterrible terrifies enemies I enemy rebar rebraces ranger rally rowboat I pinball pinhole camera porno (BED AND BOARD… the two girls abandoned… caressed.. and gestured) I pinhole pond MOND globe god bends cross beckons and cross bares pinball TILT trinity Pinball cross bath body backside not madhouse because language Because language prophets pond pitch shutouts then eon an ran pan and plague prayer Because language prophesies Son of man machine shift language languages
I cross out the word and I cross out the language but I continue to experiment Cross I experiment cross across cross the crossing cut across body and bodies / body ebullient insects My body cross not crossed out but we are climbing Jacob’s Ladder Cross compares cinema photograph body desert document
I Like Machine Colors Recurring Light Patterns
The animals are coming by The doings were beginning A she-loon too soon A he-loon too soon
Simultaneous animals soon snow Simultaneous I snow syntax syringe animals cell animacule
I see snow beginning begin against and go glass glow animal I see snow radioactive glass a she-loon too soon sound uranium snow Snow sweep see several animals sea Snow sweep sword see a she-loon too soon animal spectral Serial animal spectral field seen
I see snow field page canvas Seen field page snow library of babel Babel ben adam field page circular ruins Babel ben body flesh forks torture garden paths field page canvas Page canvas ruins rib cage: rib cage labyrinth X labyrinth letter light latter light flesh field page imaginary prisons imaginary poisons Prison page field imaginary flesh punch poison black iron prison Shape canvas see black oak ouroboros / ebullient prison melt mappage Field page canvas enormous subterranean vaults with stairs and mighty machines Spiral stairs El Shaddai Stair helix Adonai hatch hell Keep work khora kenotic labyrinth Kitana Krystal creep keep labyrinth candle Khora Keep work candle cove khora creepypasta spaghettification Khora no corridor but alchemical laboratory
I read the film / art / music blog The Art of Memory and the author has this to say about the movie JoJo Rabbit:
Because I look at color for a living, it has become more pronounced in my life the last couple of years. One recent trend online is the film color palette analysis where specific films are represented in stills and color swatches as shown below. For some reason this trend has begun to get bothersome for this reviewer because it reduces the great art form to interior graphic design. Watching this film and looking at the extreme contour of color present just started getting painful to watch after awhile. All “in” colors like earthy yellows, teals, muted greens very much present and calling (too much) attention to themselves. Too much control.
Too much control…
How much do you know about color theory? asks Violet. About zero I think. I might have read some of Kandinsky’s about how orange angel trumpet fanfare and stuff. I would start reading Munsell Color Theory, she says. That’s where we got started in art. What made you think about the topic of color theory? I say. I was talking about it with someone and thought you might have some interesting takes on it, says Violet. I like colors, I say.
I like colors I like colors color across eye eyes Colors prominence of color appearing brilliant and intense I like machine colors recurring light patterns during the mescaline experience Experience color exceed experiment: checkerboard angular spike multicolor dot I mix color with color simple fractals turn complex repeated human flesh I eat amorphous shape animated stain glass illumination / light color lavender leaks low through my eyelids I like colors Christina cobweb figures: variations of human form constants
Study more color I study more color eye animal Color clear lake red body red body coral and sponge color color body constant Contact color body contact microphone body miniature Microphone elephant grave glass menagerie
Study color more color / not too much control Color sharp-quiet queer spirit Sharp-quiet sprite a triangle and a circle taryn color I sharpen color on my body cut right angles My body awl angle all two primary and most strongly contrasting plane figures I figure sharp-quiet fire color Fire forks triangles, circles, and crescents and fire inside interacts Fire inside inscribes kaleidoscope color
I like color: study more color more colors Red body coral and sponge color (not too much control do not deny the accident or control the accident but let the color happen Let the color happen as color / color happenings Color happens human / body unsettled red heat Red heat hitch knot hell color
Not control but bird cartoon crash enchanting eye-filling pin-ups Chance color aleatoric anvil: anvil butter blacksmith Color neon thin arson nightingales Nightingale wail language linguistics logorrhea and langoustine / longhorn beetle lighthouse
Too much control My aunt asks me how to get into making art She asks what supplies I use, and what is better, pencil or ink Pencils give more control, I say, but I like inks because there are surprises that happen
Work open color and surprise color Open color underpainting body pigment Open color body work surprise scripture Surprise holy spirit spectre lights loud ghosts Loud ghost leopard open spirit
I improvise ghost lights: light light slate grey and light blue steel I improvise ghost color (more improvisation, more chance, more aleatoric) Not too much control but more open and let go I let go of my controlling ego but let the process and color work (Hey, you have too much of yourself in here – leave room for the non-self) Room others and happenings: room other experiments Outside outside room
Work room color watercolor: more ocean color wheel Horror body color coral exquisite few perfumes penetrating color Few perfumes fire flight foam wing window water colors Window watercolor reach room
Moonlight flash film colors Work color the underside, legs, and carapace appear black, with white spots marked on the abdomen
(Aleatoric abdomen adjacent apocalypse) (Aleatoric abdomen adjusts color / juxtaposed tiny dabs of color that through optical blending form a single and more brilliant luminous hue)
I work more surprising colors room color and the upper side of the abdomen could be white or yellow, and the color of the spines vary accordingly I work upper light and outer light hell colors (Lucifer is the patron saint of the visual arts Color, form – all these are the work of Lucifer)
I code color six different solo parts – connections – feelings contrasted and various
Simultaneous surprise colors collage syntax Simultaneous colors toggle switch tape music Simultaneous syntax music attacks accents assemblages Syntax simultaneous solfege flood color silver colloid bodies Colloid body celluloid color / I reduce my book to interior graphic design I extend my book to interior graphic design / desert myth Extend radar radon balloon reach Color balloon system Krystal khora korakoram Korakoram crimson and ochre cover cynocephale cyan canines
My teeth church sharp myth Simultaneous teeth sound myth variable for microintervals less than a sixteenth of a tone: I search the myth searching and searching sound varying its time every color Simultaneous color search syntax search STRETCH stone color Stretch search stars scramble search scrawl color Starscream touch color transformer search spots shocks painted speculum I spell mirror myth cluster bodies
A creation myth which paradoxically mythologizes human creations
I make color as myth and I myth color as moth / a myth is a female moth I myth color color myth (I am seeking to uncover the 12 identities, the 12 forces, of my system… We’re moving into the mythological realm now)
Move myth color moment momentum taryn knot myth
Flesh interests me as myth and painting Flesh fascinates me as flood color (NUDISM does it stand for health or vice)
The author of an atrocious undertaking ought to imagine that he has already accomplished it, ought to impose upon himself a future as irrevocable as the past
I undertake dark underneath I undertake dark page canvas field fold page Page underneath nude descending staircase spiral canvas page spear windowpane I undertake the Book atrocious and horrific, the supple sequence of body horrors harrier silk sequoia (living dead men – existing on the flesh of the young and beautiful! HORROR OF THE ZOMBIE)
I author atrocious myth watercolor undertow taryn twice body tennis
I accomplish impossible Book and you shall be in the Book You shall be in the Book and the house is a long way from here but you won’t get lost if you take this road to the left and at every crossroads then again to your left
Myth color left long house long road Myth watercolor water way long house left machine color I machine last house on the left Machine lamb book long tone last house on the dead end street
I author left lights lesser and great lighters
I abandon all this in order to compose a book and a maze
I abandon the Book to write the Book
Live light show left Live light left shower shoulder lightning During the live shows, I reprise this element of my past into my performances by engaging in ostinati striptease / plastic bag of urine thrown into the audience Audience audible automatic machine color left lavender audience Left lavender luminaria mint lithopone
Conversations With Asia 07/07/2020 1:23 AM
I’m currently rereading certain books that were important to me during my mystical and prophetic experiences, I say. Maybe I’m trying to return to my roots of prophecy. Sometimes it’s good to return to stuff like that to see if it still speaks to you or if you get new revelations from it, says Asia. You’ve been so supportive of my insanity, I say. I’ve been through those dark seasons and I know you’re never really the same person coming out of it, she says. Your perspective changes. Tell me about your dark season, if you’re comfortable doing so. I guess looking back at it, it was one really long dark season with a lot of dips, she says. It had a lot to do with identity, who I was, who I wanted to be, and who I thought I should be. Being a twin can sometimes complicate identity, and coming from a fundamentalist background means that an identity is pushed on me. At first I beat myself up for not fitting the fundamentalist role. Then when I abandoned that and started exploring who I was outside of that I felt like I had lost something. The rest had to do with family and feeling betrayed and abandoned, she says. Wow, you've been through quite a transformation, I say. Are you still transforming? Probably… Yeah I think I am. But I think that’s part of being alive. The dark periods I think have a lot to do with not knowing where you are going and being afraid, says Asia.
I fear and I do not know where I go but I transform I never cease transforming I never cease transforming and I feel hopeful I will continue writing Asia for the rest of my life I perform thrown transformation greater dark / projected word wilderness Wild word experiment thrown desert dark beach
Thrown tone halftone tectonic: torch time taryn throw Thrown taryn tongue transformer: twister transformation tripod throw tripod aporia tripod tetrachord cannon / cannon canal Cannon canon canal Christina cadillac casino casino Casino casio epicycloid system dynamics / desert dark transformer
I transform desert direction indirect direction Transform desert direction drift different direction I abandon direction and I take up direction Book desert I transform the Book as a House (I transform the Book into many materials and substances) I transform the book into the House and the House is a long way from here The Long Book and the Long House collide coarse horses Yahweh of Host hostages I avalon house architect tectonic tapestry taryn Avalon audobon bird blanket blue bath: an ivory labyrinth a minimum labyrinth a labyrinth of symbols an invisible labyrinth of time
Lightfast labyrinth length Lightfast labyrinth licorice luxurious length: luxury lightyears Lanthanum labyrinth lighthouse lipstick I mold malleable the language labyrinth / ductile desert wire I experiment labyrinth long wire instrument
I experience begin after three seconds Begin after three seconds color labyrinth Three seconds colors sex sinew pomegranate: orange orchard labyrinth Begin immediately begin immediately ben adam Begin immediately immediately labyrinth repetition Begin after two seconds
Modular color open color confederations Operator color constellations starclump aggregates I aggregate color counterweights and counterweights spin space / raw room Raw body room Asia among rivers River larger room the house a long way from here Here I withdraw to write a Book: I withdraw to construct a labyrinth
Several odd colors seep through the labyrinth translucent cut complete transparent I liken the colors to the Book and Labyrinth hot house orange and red
I Knew I Was Beginning A Book
I begin the Book as old as fire and water I begin the Book seven days and seven nights times the number of years it took the universe to let go
Book body braid begin Book braid blade bereshit shutter nets sex / surreptitious spirit Secret spirit book scroll begin: I begin scroll secret speech I begin scroll book shut seven seals
Book body shutter shield vision volcano Vision vanishes golden gate bodies eddy immediate eruption Immediate eruption incomplete eruption cataract calls to cataract understanding in a car crash Book smash lash crash the animals are coming
The animals are coming by the Book as old as fire and water
The animals come cartoon animation The animals come I’ll not carrion comfort despair not feast on thee I drink the death well animal: I drink death wilderness worship animal I worship her animal horn and antlers / I drink your blood and eat your skin
When, as a child, I wrote my name for the first time, I knew I was beginning a book
I begin Book without name and without God I begin the Book without name and without god the word body woman Word body woman krystal lin logos
I write my name nonexistent numbers I write my name the superluminary nexus near nothing next nothing my name negated but Book I experience body as Book and I experiment body Book ben adam
The animals are coming anarchic language and anechoic chamber language: language bridal chamber ben adam the animals are coming antinomian nuit body el saturn records sabbatean The animals are coming by the doings were beginning Book: I write Book beginnings and you shall be in the Book
I knew I was beginning a book: I knew I begin the Book be adam Book the doings were beginning I begin the language light ladder book bright light language Bright night name supernal name nothing none nexus name network
The animals are coming by six different solo parts – connections – freely contrasted and varied Noon at the center of the world simultaneous hexachord heterodoxy Begin simultaneous animals hyena hexachords Simultaneous six segments sex subway word whistle Whistle register simultaneous tape music tapeworm Word tapeworm woman wire ire works: ire work my body wick noon then no noon a desolate place for prayer I dream body desolation desert dream
I want to share something I’m cutting from the Book but you’d like to hear:
I don’t know how I befriended a wonderful friend like Asia but I feel immensely grateful for her… One of Asia’s strengths is honest compassion and even when stringent, I often feel she speaks to me with best intentions in mind and our friendship's interest in mind I love her but I do not love myself but this writing acts as a therapy / therapies / philosophical approaches to healing…
Maybe this is really how your writing is prophecy, says Asia. Prophesying to yourself like a lantern in the darkness, she says. I always think of prophecy as an outward activity, like a prophet communicating to others, I say. You look inward first, says Asia, and through prophesying to yourself, you reach others too.
I prophesy simultaneous holy spirit book hexachord holy spirits I prophesy six different solo parts punk punch body pop Body fire crackers simultaneous prophetic punch porno (Join the artist as he searches for beautiful models to paint in THE VERY NAKED CANVAS see the spectacular nudist beauty contest)
Simultaneous solo nude: naked noon soon sun Simultaneous soon son son of man hypomanic tapeworm music Tape music simultaneously tomb mold meninges leviathan
Simultaneous stone sock syntax: syntax lazarus taxon syrup
Stone sink body simultaneous primordial soup syntax / toggle switch tape music Music syntax attacks accents assemblages Simultaneous syntax solfege soda stream bodies bath flesh I bath flesh blue soliton radar system syntax
I subdivide syntax into simultaneous stomach sections
I switch simultaneous stampede insects: soup and tape noon Switch switch syntax simultaneous strike language
The animals are coming serpent syntax sidewind Sidewind sidewinder word woman wild mouse the animals are coming avant-garde free funk god: god at a point stretch time stretch music Stretch music my body graffiti tag stretch marks / flesh ugly syntax Syntax radar radon balloon Sidewind system krystal khora Sidewind krystal khora korakoram syntax I stretch the syntax stretch Stretch syntax strange skin sidewind: language music long melody Syntax melody monster movie gospel of mark specter of marx Mage music maze music fork syntax: syntax fork fuck forest Forest water the animals are coming
The animals are coming by The doings were beginning A she-loon too soon A he-loon too soon
Simultaneous animals soon snow Simultaneous I snow syntax syringe animals cell animacule
I Jump To Vision: I Jump This Is Where Time Becomes Space
content warning: discussion of suicide, suicidal ideation, depression, body horror
Abandon dark abaddon don dark Abandon dark dense abaddon bold body basking shark brush / shark experiment untitled sediment Over orange dark dark red-orange near orange Near orange omen ouroboros amen Amen I say to you, there is no one who has given up home or wife or brothers or prophets or children for the sake of the Kingdom of God who will not receive an overabundance return this present age and eternal life in the age to come Amen I tell you, only dark: dark amen omen ouroboros / orthogonal obsidian Flint knife flintlock open kingdom: open omen ouroboros amen Not kingdom but oracle and omen: omen armbar onyx
My brain breeds repetition: my brain bleeds repetition My brain repeats death: I want to die, I want to die, I want to die Gerard Manley Hopkins writes: My cries heave, herds long; huddle in a main, a chief woe, world-sorrow… My brain repeats: I want to die, I want to die, I want to die… Nothing moves, raw repetition, stripped nothing dirty sink realism
I feel frustrated, I say. I feel foolish. Did you think about what you wanted to say in response to my question yesterday. I said that I disagree because you are not alone, says Asia. You have friends who care about you even if one is sick. You have family who cares about you – you even just got back from you parent’s house. I really doubt every single second of your life has been miserable. I guarantee there has been some good moments mixed in, says Asia.
Suicidal depression is the worst because it’s so boring: the oppressive repetition of the same destructive thoughts Incessant repetition and intrusion – no novelty I feel boring and bored and self-destructive and I write so I can DO something – otherwise I would sleep or sit whale waste land Qohelet said it better than me: All things are wearisome more than one can explain: the eye is not satisfied with seeing or the ear with hearing… What has been is what will be and what has been is what will be done; there is nothing new under the sun… Job said it better than me: For my sighing comes like my bread, and my groaning are poured out like water… truly the thing that I fear comes upon me, and what dread befalls me… I am not at ease, nor am I quiet: I have no rest but trouble comes… David Berman said it better than me: You see, the life I live is sickening I spent a decade playing chicken with oblivion Day to day, I’m neck and neck with giving in I’m the same old wreck I’ve always been
I asked what difference I made to you personally, I say. Yes, I know, says Asia. I decided to explain my response. What is so important to hear how you make a difference specifically to me? Because I’m talking to you and you can speak for yourself and not anyone else. I don't know what to tell you to make you feel worthy or worthwhile, says Asia. You are my friend, I care about you and I enjoy talking to you, she says. I didn’t ask you though what to say how to make myself feel worthwhile. I figured you’d know what to say if I asked how I make a difference for you. I feel you could answer it easily. I feel like that you are looking for a reason to justify your existence, says Asia. I’m searching for something I haven’t said before and that will be impactful to you and I’m struggling to think of something, she says.
I wanted to disappear, one man said. So the Golden Gate was the spot. I’d heard that the water just sweeps you under. Jumpers tend to idealize what will happen after they step off the bridge. Suicidal people have transformation fantasies and are prone to magical thinking, like children and psychotics, Dr. Lanny Berman, the executive director of the American Association of Suicidology says. Jumpers are drawn to the Golden Gate because they believe it’s a gateway to another place. They think that life will slow down in those final seconds, and they’ll hit the water cleanly, like a high diver.
I feel overwhelmed, says Asia. I’m obviously upset at the idea of losing a friend but I don’t know how to make that mean something to you so my gut reaction is to go neutral and shutdown because it feels overwhelming. I understand why you feel overwhelmed too. The world is unfair and good people that we love suffer for no good reason and it feels like fighting against the wind even trying to think about trying to do something about it. Because how do you eve start? How do you put a dent in this shitty world? You aren't alone. I know it’s not easy t o believe that but it’s true. We seem like we are built to be lonely. Little slugs floating inside skulls, unable to fully connect with others or know for sure that we understand their perspectives. Hoping that we accidentally bump into someone. But we aren’t alone. There are other little slugs floating around too, says Asia.
A number of bodies become trapped in the eddies stirred by the bridges massive stone piers, and sometimes wash up as far away as the Farallon Islands, about thirty miles off. These corpses suffer from “severe marine depredation” – shark attacks and, particularly, the attention of crabs, which feed on the eyeballs first, then the loose flesh of the cheeks. Already this year, two bodies have vanished entirely.
I recall my conversation with Asia concerning the short story The Very Pulse Of The Machine All this could well be nothing more than a hallucination. Nothing but the sound of her brain short-circuiting and squirting bad chemicals in all directions. Madness. One last grandiose dream before dying. Martha had no way of judging… She jumped… Briefly, she flew I want to jump I jump ajar jaguar jersey devil orgasm Jump body nonsense my body nonsense serpent body horror Ben body island inland empire / body horror the empire never ended Jump end to end black iron prison Jump jab body enjambment: body over ajar Atari joystick body
I jump jagged jigsaw body sine wave Jump sine wave wolf stone and stone tooth I jump tooth taryn jagged edge over oval gospel of mark Gospel of mark urgrund anxieties handaxe extension axe head extended field Flesh jumps swordfish fissure gospel of mark fisher fissures fisher king hauntology I jump against haunted abyss (I am I am believe, recovering from a deep fit of nervous prostration – I suppose I ought to call it – I did not know it but I was dying) I punch the language punishes me / penal colony language sonnet black iron prison Hunger artist language saw sonata mud muppet bones / human bone upper room Upper room unrest saturday night wrist / sabbath slack body hang I jump hell hanging pretty birds get caught by cats too (this to hoard unheard, heard unheeded, laves me a lonely began)
I only begin every beginning language / all language ein sof secret snow in water I dip my body snow: cloud snow torn tufts tossed Taryn tiger pillars Pillar cloud clash catastrophe / clang strophe stack starch arc bodies Cloud conic cross curved stone or bone
The discovery and invention of new / old sources for poetry
Time flows past the permanent central position… They at a place called noon, at the center of the world, the only place where space and time intersect
Time flows fears no window
Noon now identical midnight most antipode hell and purgatory / Jerusalem volcano volcano ash cloud cloud ash pillar
Time tunnel time Time tunnel Taryn time displaces space where time and space intersect Cloud time decalced carmelite noon midnight match mysticism Noon midnight match mass mystery Mystery midnights bob dylan hopped up mustang ford
I jump I jump I wanted to disappear so the Golden Gate was the spot I’d heard that the water just sweeps you under I jump afternoon cable television supermarket sweep and shop til you drop I jump bay geography bay geology my body bats ocean stones (and if you practice daily and become the best in the world you can go on to live an impoverished life of utter absurdity)
Are we friends? Do you feel we know each other well? Do you think we could tell me more about being upset if you lost me as a friend? Yes, we are friends, says Asia. I think we know each other pretty well. I would experience a lot of grief and despair, she says.
I jump this is where time becomes space I jump this is where time becomes space Philip K. Dick psychosis / suicidal people have transformation fantasies and are prone to magical thinking like children and psychotics I jump magic vision and psychotic vision
Why vision when vision When vision mind beware her woman Why vision where no voice but sabbath south No voice south knife psychosis Sabbatai Sevi Sabbatai Sevi jumps sequenza holy ghost ben adam backgammon I jump game god cry for a vision (why vision when wind work) Why vision when how work: how hell long bone horrors Long bone visions of bodies being burned torch stone Body horror vision and visions von stone bonfire ben adam bonfire petroglyph geode god visions (Petroglyphs in the cave Ana O Keke resemble the feather-like rong orongo glyph 3 and a compound glyph 211:42, a hapax legomonon found in B-1, followed by a V-shape that may be glyph-27. A line of divots pass through them)
Glyph gown ground god grow glows geometry geology Glyph gag gab gate gift: gift golden gate splattered bodies smattered egg shutters Glyph gang graph language: long sound language gala gather bodies Germ glyph god gut gold gore bodies (I think I am better off dead, I say. Death would provide relief but you wouldn’t get to feel it, says Christina. I’m sorry you’re hurting, she says. Not feeling is better than what it is now, I say. Do you hate my guts? I don't hate your guts, says C. I love your guts, she says.) Germ glyph gut body graph: my intestines grind iron gall ink I jump my body germ guts joshua tree microbiota / ben adam severe marine depredation I jump the glyph of dreaming body dune dock damn son of man son of sam
He who loves his dreaming is lost She who loses her dreaming drifts my drowning desert dark forest dark I lose snowdrift desert vision-body bow and arrow blowfish flesh: ben adam flesh pharmakon healing and poison
Noon at the center of the world naive noise Noon noise nor centered but noun stated on air Air aether arch the only place whose space and time intersect / this is where time becomes space Noon space noise no wave beware woman dreaming I dream the spacious noise without dream (Two instances of the heralding sequence from line Ca7, one from before and one from after the Full Moon. The fish at the end of the letter is invented, and in the sequence immediately following the fool moon, the longneck bird is reversed) I dream the line and sequence through the line and sequence Line and sequence joins jump bird reverse body rush black ice
Bird inverted invents ben body reverse Body bird full moon follow fire I follow central fire flesh reverse / reverse bird bounce body
The animals are coming by the doings were beginning The doings were begun A she-loon too soon a he-loon too soon
Animals agon again Asia among rivers Animal open ghost agon Asia river again there shall be soft rains Animal rain noon word full moon mood indigo Animal inverts two: two jumping experiments Animal inverts modes of limited transposition / ben body transformed melodies Two instances: two experiments Two experiments two jumps unjointed animals / animal spirals birds in reverse Place and time intersect noon my body (my body birds written noise burr ben: you are the one who writes and the one who is written) (I write rain animal rain jumper)
Two instances place space time intersect Place space scroll body (a number of bodies become trapped in the eddies stirred by the bridge’s massive stone piers, and sometimes wash up as far as the Farallon Islands, about thirty miles away)
I want to die. I hope you do not, says Krystal. I hope that you live forever like a vampire or a zombie or Elvis – but mostly like a vampire, she says. You’d do fine without me, I say. No, I’m going to be a vampire too, she says. You’re stuck with me, she says. Do you really want me to live forever? Yes, says Krystal.
I jump visions of fish at the end of the letter Fish speaks stone Fish steer stone automobile jumper cables
Animals come by fishers of men bodies in bay Animals are coming by particularly the attention of crabs which feed on the eyeballs first then the loose flesh of the cheeks My bodies vanish in vision
Six Different Solo Parts Contrasted And Varied
content warning: discussion of mental illness and suicide / suicidal ideation
I like the phrase hapax legomemnon
I let logos lego my body lag fat Body below black long ribbon rabbit logos: logos lego nonlinear noise Pure noise uninfluenced by musical ideas or human intention uses feedback vocals various electronics hard noise hard bop
Noise enters crowd noise Noise enter crowded noise (cicada brood broad brush Noise body below black long ribbon noise Noise mademoiselle anne anterior ungulate cortex comic noise: anne nib noise notre nymphonie areole Areole aurora noise anthology naked
I like the phrase hapax legomemnon further noise Farther noise flother a synonym for snowflake Flother sign of the father asymmetrical snowflake Snowflake haze noise god the farther floater, a hapax legomemnon of written English found in a manuscript entitled The XI Pains of Hell (circa 1025)
Hebanon, a poison referred to in Shakespeare's Hamlet once Hebanon bay bile body noise: body dance wiggle word wailing noise weep warszawa Warszawa wined eyeliner enamel noise Warszawa jaws copacener sun rough epicycloids Brief body epicycloid noise so soapsuds sarcophagus no soap radio Epicycloid so noise knapsack body / fanny pack flesh sphere packed locust locker Epicycloid similar brief body coquette who reveals pallid palladium rockets vertigo: vertical rocket short medium long rocket ram runner I run word noise ribbon to ribbon / asymmetrical flother
Northelyre, a word for “education”, occurs only once in Chaucer Epicycloid insect education / I educate insect exoskeleton I endure insect education wing edge: edge edit imago morphisms Northelyre tiger trick tendon tension tender Northelyre tiger lantern trick lent light loops: cassette loop noise
Slaewerigne, “sleep-weary” occurs exactly once in the Old English corpus in the Exeter Book… There is some debate whether it means “weary with sleep” or “weary for sleep” I sleep with language: I sleep weary word awake I sleep awake winter word winter music Sleep space noise navigate I navigate loose ellipse large lunar eclipse (According to Zipf’s Law, this Book contains numerous hapax legomemnon / lego logos mercator mutant mappings)
I hope the Book’s hapax legmomenon light novel and new (I hope my hapax legomemnon sound COOL) I want to create thunderwords thunderbirds tetragrammaton / different doublings and difficult doppelgangers Tetragrammaton KRYSXTRYN + Asia Among Rivers / Christina Marie Alysalolitagestaquachromagenesis I chant enchant thunderword thunderbird duplicate belly-to-belly suplex
Eccentric epicycloids / a variety of unusual noise-making objects Noise power tools drills heavy machinery
I grapple god noise I grapple noise god and I wrestle sharp harsh El Roi This sample of El Shaddai digitally clips and I clip through the ceiling Christianity coagulates crucifix clots in my bash sample bloodstream and eucharist intrudes fat embolism
The ambiguous or amphibious god amputates ben body animation massive dose methamphetamines and an armless metatron machines Christina names from metamorphic rock
The ambiguous or amphibious god salamander melancholy separated human bodies and Melchizedek tap tomb tome to a tenth of everything Melchizedek and Messiah mirror a modal machine Sabbatai Sevi and this automaton augurs Adonai aerial bore holes I feel ambiguous alchemy drill bone heavy machinery Ambiguous archery trepan gold pan neurotransmitters: transmigration boil interpretation and intersection Transmigration bubble interference and interferon / open carry apple orchard automatics
Write automatic ambiguity and write ambiguous automata Amphibian flow ferrous ambidextrous malleable both directions at once
Angular ambiguity saws simile autograph machine morphisms Angular ambiguity imp autoclave contradictions creep concentric contradiction Contradiction crimp compact contradiction camera Christianities Concave then convex Christianities camera cusps (cusp catastrophe cups apocalypse circulations) (Christianity zero kelvin comic strips I draw churches in contradiction)
Christianity – concave or convex Christianity – keter concrete quartertone cusps and cusp in tone clusters I stack seconds cusp tone clusters close holy spirit flutter flywheel woman
KRYSXTRYN conquers my concrete – body body collage and concert – thrown into theater (A young benjamin writes: I want a Christianity that is perfectly inclusive and perfectly egalitarian. I want a Christianity that unifies itself in difference: its difference present but overwhelmed by a Christian’s obligation to imitate Christ and partake in the sacraments given to the Church. I want a Christianity driven by love and self-surrender, surrendering to others, in communion and community…) (I don’t remember when I abandoned this personal vision of Christianity, but at some point, I felt any form of Christianity seemed incompatible with the most radical and anarchic vision of love and compassion I witnessed in dream and vision My creativity – even though I myself do not understand this still-mystical creativity – attempts not to make an ersatz-Christianity or a transcendent substitute but through creative anarchic techniques to allow a freer and more expressive language An unrigid language that contaminates language and language An impossible flat language language fuck syntax fuck syntax Not a disavowal or erasure of my Christina tradition, but recognizing the tradition, utilizing it, and effectively transfiguring it through the creative-anarchic / impossible flat impossible infinite depth) (KRYSXTRYN terra trickster sister turbulent: KRYSXTRYN terror traveler a daughter tyranny Tare tone the tank Taryn: temple tabernacle freer tetragrammaton I pronounce the tetragrammaton freely Sabbatai Sevi though to and two the tricky terrain and Taryn tramples flavorless salt Christianities I tune and trouble the melody Krystal and the sequenza sequesters and ensouls me, a king of god erasure)
Bursts of TV rock, synth whistles and barks, banjo licks, and sound effects intensify the caffeinated jumping through false hoops of this slick and cinematic silly music) (No transition needed between a place outside – such as a forest or park or the bench – and an interior room)
Christianity is a fucking crypt / Christianity is a cipher-text Christianity copy code cobweb crypt and I calculate catacombs the factorization of large numbers Christian graves number nightmares absolute night night dark body
Christianity clings to my body like years cigarette smoke Christianity plays my body the bowels of the church: the cloud of forgetting and the cloud of unknowing Christianity cloud keeps cross: cross climb krystal khora Cloud-puft-ball torn tufts tossed pillows flaunt forth then chevy on air-built thorough-fare
Cloud-puft ball torn tufts tossed pillows flaunt forth the chevy on the air-built thoroughfare
Cloud clout ben-body dirt clod blood clot Blood cloud body experiment Blood cloud broad brush vampire bat body Blood cloud broad campfire body: cloud broad sword assorted clouds Cloud experiment body experiment: smoke laboratory Laboratory elucidates and elaborates
Gerard Manley Hopkins, I am your bipolar sibling and I too hear your influx and inscape and sprung rhythm
(I wake and feel the fell of dark, not day) (No Worst there is none, pitched past pitch of grief, more pangs will, schooled at forepangs, wilder wrings)
Tell me a bit about you? says Christina. I want to die, I say. That's it. No reason or anything. Yeah, I get that, says Christina. I don’t want you to die, she says. OK, I say. I would like to share with you something I wrote in my brainstorming notebook, I say.
From an interview with David Berman, shortly before he committed suicide:
Vish Khanna: These first two songs feature very dark, sad content but are packaged in jolly arrangements. Is that purposeful?
David Berman: Yeah, once the song is written, it just complexifies the profile of it to have the music and the words at odds. It comes naturally to me. A lot of my music is like that. For a long time, I’ve struggled very, very much with what people call treatment-resistant depression. It never goes away from me and I’m surprised I’ve made it this far, really, in life. There were probably 100 nights over the last 10 years where I was sure I wouldn’t make it to the morning. Yeah, I’m a very depressed person. I felt even worse about myself as time went on and I wasn’t doing anything. I do feel better now, having completed this project.
I wrote in my brainstorming notebook today:
I will always exist under the planet of melancholy and my spleen will always secrete an excess of unnatural black bile Sometimes I feel I understand David Berman on this record or perhaps David Berman understands me… I think about him and I think how he died where I won’t – that is, I often feel impossible to die I live forever, equally impossible… Unconsciously and consciously I keep writing and making to survive I decide to live forever by continually creating
You said it better than he did, says Christina. I want to die, but I’m trying to make – it’s miserable, I say. I understand you both, says C. My number is a lot lower than his. Yours? How many nights? She says. The same probably in 10 years. Wow, I feel for you, says C. But I love you and I appreciate you hanging in despite the utter pain.
I know night I know night dark cloud (I wake and I feel the fell of dark, not day What hours, O what black hours we have spent this night! What sights you, heart, saw; ways you went!) I know night I know night dark decade a hundred nights without name a thousand and one nights now death continual death / continuous death discontinuous
Six different solo parts – connections – feelings contrasted and varied
There lamp events off on on off lamp It is sure to be dark if you shut your eyes I only see dark: I only eye dark
Bird Iceberg Blur
Snake snow swim hayward haymaker: machine grammar Machine grammar snow serpent Snow slow by serpent ben adam apparitions: grammar gum appear ghosts Ghost gumball ghost pinball
Snake see snow language seer: I apprehend snake sight Apparition oracle ouroboros Essential I prophesy ghosts Immediate I prophesy apparitions Hauntological ben adam awl arm apparitions / bronze serpent ghosts
Snakes stake snow haymaker tabernacle: apparatus apparitions
Different I say consonant ghost event copula Ghost copula gaunt cross cuts and circle cords Cords chords coarse copula Consonant solder silver / vowel volumes Vowel voiceless volumes sword suplex / complex Sword suplex swing such serpent copula constellations: cup constellations complex pythagorean comma Comma circle chord heavy metals
I machine metal ghost milk / alchemical apparitions Machine makes mystery Machine manifests mystery it sounds like a machine It sounds like a machine metallic shimmer / shade heavy metals Machine mingles mystery metallic mime controlled body motion (inside that pit of horror there was agony and pain… SNAKES ON HER BODY) Mystery valley machine vowel volume Mystery desert machine sheets of sound bronze monastery Milk and mercury machine magi (The three Magi, Byzantine mosaic c. 565, Basilica of Sant’Apollinnire Nuovo, Ravenna, Italy. As here, Byzantine art usually depicts the Magi in persian clothing which includes breeches, capes, and phyrgian caps) Machine magi mara mystery of bitter waters wade ghosts Book bitter waters word ghost woman: Book bitter waters kar book machine bone blank verse Blank verse bone grow voiceless machine variations Book mara machines moll machine gun mica Book mara maia gaia god guts machine Gun sun immanent ghost earth Immanent ghost soil machine earth machine maul / mob ghosts Mob ghosts mold Moll gun moll a casual female companion girlfriend archaic a prostitute
What does this sound like a machine: a machine bawd call girl campfire Call girl cinema cellulose nitrate courtesan Path graph prostitute ghost: I work ghost sex wheel chariot (strange loves savage torture sudden death a bold and brutal novel of woman in war GUERRILLA GIRLS)
What does this sound like a ben bawd call girl camp follower courtesan prostitute scarlet woman street walker strumpet tart whore Sound like a machine get up get on up stay on the scene like a sex machine (when it comes to petty, these girls are purrfect! “FRENCH KITTENS”)
Machine magi mix whip and body map bodies (Incised third century A.D. Sarcophagus slab depicts the Adoration of the Magi, from the catacombs of Rome. Translated as “Severa, may you live in God,” Severa being the woman buried in the sarcophagus and likely the figure on the left of the inscription)
Ben body map machine: machine adequate assembly and apparent assembly Body map adequate apparitions and apparent apparition ben body map blood and black lace assembled apparitions Apparitions arc abnormal animation: athletic animation machine airborne Abundant aether apparition assemblages Apparition apophenia antlers / I shapeshift into strange deer strangle doe deserts
Machine magos magoi (So I can be heard beyond the magi) machine magi methamphetamine maximum / I machine maximum body I machine maximum body map body bodies (SEX COMMUNES an eye-open case-history of hippie sex communes and communal ways of loving between pot… pills… and perversion) Machine ben body grappa methamphetamine maximum machine wolverine methamphetamine minimum I map minimum assemblage and minigun ghost ghost mashup marshmallow remix Ghost remix rain glitch minimum god body Mashup machine mina march mule mace body marsh Body monophonic machine: monophonic machine monophonic multiplicity multiplicities Machine want mast math / clipper body myth Clipper body myth moves magi: monophonic funk movies Monophonic microwave funk flesh machine worship I worship mad machine monk magma motion body: body bicycle multiplicities It sounds like a machine and I machine scribe dead sea scrolls I scribe scripture a machine lightning-and-thunder manuscripts
I assemble aleatoric manuscripts play palimpsest: manuscripts play palimpsest archimede circle engineering I play palate foot use fool will girl look secret tortoise than cut from carousel Remix merry-go-round rain stations of the cross: Christ the first that was given Christ the holy flower of the father Christ the first to sit upon the luminaries Christ the perfect man in the pillar Christ the resurrection of then that have died in the church
I contemplate writing through the Gospel of Mark and Gospel of Thomas again, starting from the beginning I frequently pick up and abandon writing projects and I doubt I’d ever complete writing through any book of the Christian bible or the Nag Hammadi Codex, but it seems a project worth failing at over and over again
I repeat Christ stations of the cross repeat Christ the resurrection and the life Resurrection and the life my flesh real flesh and my blood real drink I repeat book blood blunt trauma labyrinth
Rainfall resurrection rhizome slow labyrinth: maze body stations of the cross
Jesus the first gift that was given (Give grammar Grammar give ghost gradual: grammar incline plane prostitute palimpsest Give grammar rhizome garbage: PKD trash layer first flesh loops) (I gesture gift graphic violence vowel violence volumes)
I mime bridal chamber machine mallet cross: The bride’s solid, main rectangular form branches out into slender tentacle-like projections I mime my body bride and I machine my body bride braid bullets Ben adam body bride beast from the sea suntrees sundress sanctuary Snake sanctuary stack her projection jaw circuits and signals She sutures several synthesizers sine skulls ben skull scribe snakeskin synthesizer chain channels and I change channels sternum television I change channels sphenoid television and my cranium antennae fuse judas iscariot amplifier project Project projects point noise bone knock Noise ropes rectangular body nonrigid break bodies: breaking bodies breaker bodies bright blue noise Cube noise and sphere noise nurse body haze / holy spirit smog Everything distorts everything Everything distorts everything and everything transforms everything (I pull, stretch, and transform the plane I pull, stretch, and transform the lateral plume)
I repeat Christ stations of the cross and his flesh flowers father frostbite I repeat Christ body horror cross timber eel timbre…
I dream fraction true cross splinter: splinter spike ben flesh expose fat I dream eye splinter this is not a spiral staircase this an emergency staircase Cross give vigorous cave catacomb Cross ben vision vigorous cage polychord cathedral Vowel volume vigorous cage stations of the cross Cross cage stations of the cross sign of the cross celluloid cataclysm (cell division catechism: mitosis meth cataclysm) Cage cage know dance dam spiral staircase syntax Spiral staircase syntax cross syntax emergency staircase Syntax wiggle word staircase column syntax row ran syntax / desert diagonalization
I like the phrase hapax legomemnon
Hapax lateral plume plumb bird body Body bird bride hapax parallax light
The image of the bird, which incorporates human elements Although some of these birds look benign, their mere presence appears ominous
Bird iceberg blur ben body blur iceberg barrage Bird barrage body bunker
Bird bunker brink body breaker body
Bird riverbank water human features
Bird emerges storm surge body subtle ice Ben ice image brawls body horror I repeat books bloody blunt trauma labyrinth
Horrors have exquisite give geophagia Geophagia first gift gavel flesh gravel sun / geophagia perfumes flesh burn book sand smoke Geode gut gulf gore ball eye lye longnecks Longneck lap and lurch leather throat in lights and lights in the throats Lightbulbs ben throat flesh filament / film bird body Flesh filaments phylacteries
Horrors exquisite horrors Exquisite horrors exquisite squish body head hound horror I gulp god geophagia I gulp geophagia gap blood gush / fire physics flourishes Horror orb eye ornamental ouroboros / driller killer baroque Rip body rib rococo rock lobster carcasses Caracas carbona not glue consonant cut closed voice off open voice Compsognathus consonant lit tune comma corpuscles (restoration of archeaopteryx chasing a juvenile compsognathus)
The image of the bird bird ben body body bag Bird bax body blood give cross Cross cut body hit hit bird / hard cock consonants Bird battering ram rhizome raining blood Reign in blood raining blood from a lacerated sky
Bird book burn hook bone: bone sample bone biopsy
I take samples from self-help as hypnotherapy cassettes Cassette corset bird image constantly liquefied the retina Cadette cornea castrate castlevania crush moth mouth shush My mouth mount moth mirror mush
Horrors have exquisite geophagia few perfumes Few perfumes unfix flesh fat flow but fire fight fang ben body beetle window Beetle wing window watercolour
Bird wing watercolour incorporates human features I feature perfume bird body burn book sphere Although some of these birds benign, they burn human bodies in bonfires Part vegetation, part rock, part bejeweled baroque palace, my body palimpsest subsists cave crickets Ben adam fuses animal mineral vegetable human body, my painting texture bone feather and stone Body stone and feather feelers beetle blue underneath oil textures Bird basks body abyss: lake or chasm situated middle ground
Bird Bride Bird Bride Christina consecrates peacock bride Christina and Christina’s canopy combs as a crescent Christina’s canopy carves crescent my body split intersections Numbered sections sequenza vitrine carcass: an inverted funnel capped by a half shape moon A series of shapes resemble a skull with two misplaced ears My long proboscis extends the field stretch and field fidgets Field extends flood floods macerated human skeletons (Wouldn't you know it? Halloween is just a couple weeks away and Nancy Smith has run out of human skeletons. They sell out so fast, marveled Smith. Often, she said, it’s a doctor and has had it in his garage for years and his wife is sick of looking at it) Field cloud floods floor macerated human skeletons (an occasional baboon or brown bear skeleton) Skeleton scrap scar tissue and black oil: ladder leeching light
This Sound Makes Maps
I bow bomb blue and I see a brisk rising cut of the sea I bow bear bird sea and the plague of its death has healed bow bomb body ben adam a celestial bow Celestial bow ben adam stone rivers: Asia among rivers and rivers River writing mirror bow surfaces: surface river stone rivers sea sound machines I bend my body blue stone bowed vibraphone (I listen to Steve Reich’s Sextet: the use of bowed vibraphone, not merely as a passing effect, but as a basic instrumental voice in the second movement, a means of getting long continuous sounds not possible with piano) Ben body sea bow blue vibraphone vision My vision hangs stone rivers I hang vision stone rivers Asia among rivers silver star layers straylight red
I modulate bay body number: number red sea / Asia among rivers Yam Suph sylph Yahweh of Hosts Body body bay of blood dip my throat slit with a billhook Billhook hang celestial bow my face split ash (I skinny dip carbon steal Morro Bay modulates bloody numbers / ben body nascent gnarled mallets mow the estuary)
Anarchic arithmetic Anarchic arithmetic Kingdom of Heaven number theory Flat ontology body horror (by sword by pick by axe bye bye THE MUTILATOR)
Mimetic modular arithmetic Memetic mothlight full moon fullerene flesh / flesh cut fuller Christina’s sharpened carbon steel cunt Christina cunt counting numbers Christina cunt missing fingers (vibraphone vision vagina dentata) flesh mothlight little gematria nears gnostic numbers: number anarchic anamnesis Nurse anarchic number anamnesis naked god gematria / hexachord gamut glossolalia Nurse anarchic arachnid numbers sprawl holy spirit glossolalia / long lateral plume Peacock number flag enamel plume flag frag fractal plume / god jut jet julia set Jut jet jazz plume orgasm / black iron prison jam band
Flesh mothlight little gematria snow monolith red sea machine Machine sea snow screen shadows on damp meetings in summer I modulate polymodal chromaticism and modes mother machines mothlight memes and mothlight low color Mothlight metal low color / on the color violet inhabit love LOVE veiled and mysterious the color of our canonesses I modulate polymodal chromaticism modes intermode wetwork: I work wetwork chariotwork char ash billhook shadowwork I work gnosis upon waters / Asia among rivers Rainforest Asia cultivates central fire I modulate polymodal chromaticism network node mothlight machine sea Mode sea mother machine machines magma modality: modal hitch knot heterogeneous Heterogeneous text text always tomes library unfixed time / prophetic time Taryn
I have to tell you a funny story, says Taryn. Please do, I say. So we were taking a backroad home and there were a bunch of cows in a field so I pulled over and rolled my window down and I was going moooo really loud and they were all staring at me so I looked up cow sounds on YouTube and connected it to my car speakers and played it real loud and all the cows started walking away, says Taryn. You’re the same Taryn as you were 15 years ago, I say. Were you alone or with your family? My son was with me. He was laughing. Does he think he was a weird mom? Probably, but it’s funny, says Taryn.
I argue apophenia with apophenia I argue apophenia to apophenia fire flesh phoenix find I approach apophenia my bodies unrelated to my bodies: my bodies unmotivated See conic connections accompanied by a specific feeling of abnormal meaningfullness I argue apple orchard apophenia and my bodies battle my bodies bottle self-reference and over-interpretation I overinterpet adonai apparitions donut desert Desert donut unifies time Taryn torus
I overinterpret my body bay body horror blue body horror blues mood indigo / I overinterpret iron gall ink Isaac laughs body horror blues hack hues she stabs me in the femoral artery with a large pair of scissors Overinterpet ben body overcode nag hammadi codex Barbed body overcode ouroboros body bantam / body cross canoe cask cannon Body overcode cipher king felix: king felix kingdom of god guillotine Bodies ciphers rupture raptor reaper hernia hydra
Apophenia assaults in assemblages and assembly lines / ambitious bodies bricoleur additional flesh Flesh body antibody automobile Accidental nude antibody automobile apophenia: autoimmune disease factions Autoimmune disease improper fraction feign flatter body: flat absolute aluminum apophenia Not epiphany but apophenia, the process of repetitively and monotonously experiencing abnormal meanings in the entire surrounding experiential field
I want to rebut and say I’m a prophet and that’s what makes the writing from the prophetic voice, I say. In that sense, the writing is behind itself. I worry I lose my prophetic voice, I say. You are hiding from yourself, says Asia. All prophets had to confront themselves. My self is death, I say. No, it’s not, says Asia. I’m beyond the writing? Is that what you’re saying? Greater than the prophetic voice or prophecy… Yes, that is exactly what I’m saying, says Asia. So take care of yourself, you divine beast. Go drink a damn glass of water, says Asia.
What does this sound like: And the beast I saw was like a leopard, its feet like a bear’s and its mouth a lion’s mouth (lion mouth cave mouth herd hyena)
What does this sound like What does this sound like seven tests What does this sound like six motionless for around three minutes being filmed the result projected in slow motion What does this sound like a new king of portraiture a slowly moving nearly still image of a person What does this sound like from the neck up with a featureless background facing forward with the portrait filling the frame from top to bottom What does this sound like What does this sound like sound poetry slam poetry performance play pause bearclaw swap swat What does this sound like the basic unit not a verb but the monosyllable adjective: round airy on dark pale orange of the sky
This sound makes maps Sea sound middle intermezzo Middle machine pick up speed Sound speed sea sweep Sea low sweep sound human skin ship There is but a single subject: that indescribable subject is every being in the universe and the beings of the universe are the organs and the mask of the deity What does this sound like all books are the work of a single author who is timeless and anonymous
Sound authors me Taryn Taryn authors ben bay of blood body without organs Sound organ human flayed augment she authors other sound She authors sound alien ionian mysticism / aeolian apophenia
Sound additive apparition opposite Opposite additive Taku Sugimoto short durations Sound opposite you are the one who writes and the one who is written
Machine makes mystery Machine manifests mysteries / gospel of mark hypomania Machine manifests manic mysteries / it sounds like a machine Machine intermingles mystery missile mortar artillery arcade Arcade point attack attaca
To Employ The Total Language
Language no limit: experiment Language no limit but experiment Experiment excitebike language bed adam: holy spirit sprites Language let the right one in interior box language Language a little light in / immediate interior walk wallpaper Ring-narrowed language: language under underneath nurture nothing Nothing language now experiment: excite experiment action I agitate action painting pigment pinata I sometimes think leaves is the only language experiment: spinning wheel leaf language (heavenleafs web of veins) Vein melter visions / vision cat multiplex time Suplex time fisher king cipher: code and coda King Felix Cipher cider spider cinder language: language last supper
Language leak strange language lost continent language body sink snow sap For language anonymous obsidian For language snow salamander south / nude psychotherapy Snow artery ampere language aleatoric ricci flow / field fire gatling language Grapple gatling language god gulf jump / language jump body cliff fall experiment
Not an anonymous pastiche language but language cut cut into language Book operate oratorio body horror opera camera Camera crackle mollusk matrix microphone mud Mollusk matador language: matador any airy cristobalite krystal lin Krystal lin cristobalite khora ligeti caravan sandpaper light lamp swamp language Caravan cristobalite psychotherapy portals: vigorous portal pat lost highway Highway hallway wallpaper body (my body basking shark shivers riverrun portal) (Portal language often ugly but I leaf my body Willem de Kooning brush stroke women) Ben brushstroke body blue divided by blue body ben Brushstroke body butter process process possession
Cage crystalline big cat body butter process krystal cage close call cataclysm (performance art group whose anarchic shows would often involve destruction of venues and audio equipment, food and garbage being thrown around, and on-stage urination) Book destroys Book blue division
I perform cage proto-city I perform distinction proto-language Performance pike phosphorous pit penicillin Performance plasma passenger high priestess / prick ply passengenwork Passage pan plant percussion pertussion work destruction Work destruction cook cain deer antler subtle rupture Cain sack proto-city serac sift crevasse proto-language
I sometimes think the leaves is only a language experiment / I experiment leaf language I experiment language leaf leaven lavender: language lateral plume Language experiment ben adam essence Language experiments experience ekstasis: kinetic language impact clap clak cataclysm Cataclysm charmicarmicat comes to earth kinetic language clock tower Language clock tower trapdoor taryn ermine intense (Sampson went back to bed not much hair left on his head he hate a slice of wonderbread and then went back to bed) Language experiments exceed excrete: swing sweat blood bebop Ben blood bebop experiment sketch acid etch scorch body torch Body torch tent straight stem arsenic Orc language experiment archeaopteryx
Leaf latch lateral plume experiment peacock Peacock coccyx polecat cataract plume polearm Leaf large letter red letter laughter Leaf lamb land sand stream stretch music Leaf stain transmigration of souls sine waves Leaf flask sheets of sound sand Sound sand leaf left lamp star
An invisible influence of the sea in my composition: perpetually, grandly, rolling in upon the shore, with slow-measured sweep, with rustle and hiss and foam, and many a thump of low bass drum
Sea science stir sediment body bisch bosch bellow Sea steer antler aleph scoop sea: I swim sea language I swim sea language shell language lush liquid Loquacious liquid lamp landscape sea Sea slim sea speed proto-language: proto-human language protoplanetary nebula Never sea noise nebula nebraska neon I light language sea
To employ the total language and range of human identities – body AND soul, evil AND good, toward a poetry attempting to be responsible for all an individual writer knows about themselves and about their works
Coleman Hawkins’ rendition of Body And Soul The unusual recording that only hints at the song’s melody; Hawkins two choruses of improvisation over the tune’s chord progression constitute almost an entire take Proto-bebop bounce body transmigration of bodies and souls
I swim sea body and soul proto-bebop proto-languages (Coltrane changes reharmonize the bridge of his arrangement of Body And Soul)
Composed sea dissolve improvised sea solutes spontaneous seas Sea scramble slowdown downtown desert Sea skulduggery downtown golgotha I empty the language and employ language sea see sea Sea see slasher film soft body Subarachnoid sea body and soul brain bleed
Sea sew so absurd towards me I meet sea Einstein on the Beach minimalist machines I machine sea maximal duration and endurance (I endure Book as sea I endure Book as typhoon and towards then often sea rogue wave scallops) I machine sea Sea machine makes manuscripts Sea machine makes microscopes microcosm macrocosm I temper turing machine substrate: machine sea marrow shuttle ocean seamstress I tend sea machine turner tempest totentanz turing machine: machine milk mower and motor oil Motor oil drop experiment immediate electric electric ladyland jimi hendrix experience Jimi Hendrix Experience experiments existentialism Turing machine opium tincture sea big titties turing machine opium tincture table tennis topiaries / camouflaged big titties Ben body and soul bowl breasts (The lonely, attractive widow found a motel in her hands. What she needed most was a good man – to manage her business – to satisfy her hunger THE TORRID WIDOW)
Turing machine sea machines modular arithmetic and number theory theater Sea slow-measure sweep number theory theater and number theater theopoetics, and I turnpike sand castle spirals scroll languages (The poet is invested with a consciousness of the earth that points back to the old shamanic function and forward to the degradation of the earth herself) (Shaman and the function of shaman – still, I frequent the subterranean and I visit underneath visions / cave mouth ghost gods I write the anarchic creative activity: I scribe poet-prophet process) (Poetry becomes an ecological survival technique) (Prophet-Poet whose mind reaches easily out onto all manners of shapes and other lives and gives songs to dreams) (Someone in another Discord said I should talk about my prophethood with a professional, I say to Asia. So they could talk me out of it, I guess? Talk you out of what? says Asia. Being a prophet. This person was pessimistic and thought I was mentally ill. Which I am! But that the prophetic vein was purely a phenomenon of my mental illness, I say. What an asshole, says Asia. Haha, he meant well. I guess I didn’t take it too personally. I guess I see your prophecy as art, says Asia. Your way of translating the world, so having someone say “have you considered that maybe it’s just an unbalance in the brain”, I’m like “wow, fuck you” says Asia. I think peoples’ thoughts of prophets are like your experience with Nancy The Prophet, I say. Soothsayers or seers who try to merely predict the future, and to most people, that's crazy and weird. I mean yeah, Nancy was crazy and weird but you aren't Nancy, says Asia. Art or prophecy is meant to open up the doors of perception, to borrow a phrase from Blake, I say, and to show the limitless nature of imagination and creation. It reconciles us to the Divine. It isn’t merely seeing into the future of being clairvoyant. It has to do with seeing everything as connected to everything and through radical love and mercy to allow justice and peace into the world, I say.)
The Poet-Shaman transformed into the Poet-Prophet Benjamin speaks through me many long dumb voices… voices of the cycles of preparation and accretion, voices of the thread that connect the slang and of wombs and father stuff…
Sea machine number theory: number theory taryn theopoetics propeller tall tales truck track apple turnover Number theory transforms ben sea sine flehs fase transfiguration fire and fire fire on fire consumes / cooked cool euler’s constant cooked cool raw and cooked cool jazz constants I cook cain cool modal jazz machine sea so what (Bill Evan’s amen response figure to the head of Miles Davis’ So What) Taryn number theory I modulate modal: I modulate polymodal chromaticism Chromatic numbers number cycles and subcycles slim crosses across (the pleasure of being in a crowd is a mysterious expression of delight in the multiplication of number: number is all and in all Number all in all: number all all All hour color numbers number cool chromatic individual Individual number number intoxicates I drink number woolworm wormwood)
Sea number nearly names machine: ben machine mechanical writing scribe analog television Sea number newly names a celestial bow: stone rivers and silver stars overlayed in red I bow phantom blue red flesh fat flask
Vision and Mysticism 