From simple melody to complicated textures to simplicity again and then back to the more dense, the more complex sounds
From here on simple sound from here on dense sounds Densities intensities immediacies: densities uncertainties open other orange grove ouroboros Orange groove ouroboros Orange grove gallop giallo: giallo gruppen language mesh Language mesh mysticisms: language mesh mutilations language mesh massacres Mosaic language mesh language maps / writings as medicines
I desire a more flexible and open language – open language languages enmeshed water matrices taryn tensors Taryn tensors transformations / language mesh multiplicities monitor lizard languages Iguana incarnation languages komodo dragon anchorite desert languages
I betray my own sense of chronological and cohesive time so the Book may transform as Book Book transforms taryn tensors trailing point tetragrammaton languages I talk to Ann Marie and I attempt to explain to her my new conception of time: I have been obsessed with constructive a consecutive of sequential chronology but the Book demands a different kind of time: not a chronological beginning-middle-end time but times and time ruptured apophatic into kingdom A suspended long time that contaminates other times An apostolic and messianic time (time times half a time) that flows times differences and deconstructions Book demands I betray and sacrifice my own sense of time – my linear sequential time – for a rhizomic nonlinear dynamic time or even a prophetic abyssal time A prophetic time khora Book transforms as Book / Taryn tensor tunnel time times half a time
Language mesh Language mesh prima materia / igneous stars Igneous stars igneous stone stirrup body stomas My stomas starts interior eye spiked with stars My eye intensifies erotic My eye irradiates a Taryn eros: soap opera entropy
I often hesitate in my heresy / heresies I feel it difficult to heretic – notice I use the term heretic and not apostate despite leaving Christianity and belonging to no religion – I still feel the residue of Yahweh and this infrared invisible outer darkness of Christianities I’m not a practitioner of anything except the Blakean sense of making myth I write myself into religious anarchy or anarchic mysticisms
(A Poet a Painter a Musician an Architect: the Man or Woman who is not one of these is not a Christian You must have Fathers and Mothers and Houses and Lands if they stand in the way of Art)
(If any one comes to me without hating his father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple Whoever does not carry his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple)
I pick up the Cross of Judas Iscariot, a greater and more burdensome cross than Jesus’ cross I pick up the Cross of Sabbatai Sevi, a greater and more burdensome cross than Jesus’ cross
(Jesus answered him and said to him, Come, that I may… [you, that]… , but you will go through a great deal of grief when you see the kingdom and its entire generation)
Language mesh marked one Language mesh mercury matrix Language mesh mammoth multiplicities Multiple mastodon languages lamina limina (an appalling amalgam of carnage and carnality… THE FLESH AND BLOOD SHOW gruesome stained in color) (mercury amalgams language attack mesh aleph mesh apocalypse)
Language mesh mash my mutated body dead sea scrolls Language mesh mutant body language leviathan / scroll chaoskamf I roll scroll scarce or scatter mysticisms Mystic minim rhythm rhythm sound gog and magog desiring-machine apocalypses The body without organs is not God but the energy sweeps divine, an enchanted surface itself in the entire process of productions I produce mesh language and not language
Date stolen: April 29, 1934 Odometer miles added by Clyde: 2,500 Damage assessment: bullet holes and blood stains
Bullet holes and blood stains sounds like a song a metalcore band would write I attempt to write something clever and poetic about bullet holes and blood stains
Language mesh bullet holes mud bodies Bullet eye beast from the sea Eye bullet eye beast from the earth interior eye erotic Interior eye cosmic egg / bodies eggs bullet hole bellies Bullet hole belly thousand year egg (paper mario thousand year door) Eye time egg my time troubled tenor I bullet hole tempest
I will write something clever and mythopoetic about bullet holes
Bullet hole bricoleur bisexuals Bullet hole beach bisexual bitches bitches brew black breath cauldron Cauldron comic sections: cauldron conic comic cascade uncertain cities Uncanny cities circus cyclic groups Groups gruppen groupers ghosts: ghost fish and fish octopus Octopus octagon heroin harpoon bone
I write bullet hole black hole I write bullet hole black hole black hair (KILL NOW PAY LATER she had a glass in one hand, a champagne bottle in the other, and trouble splashes all over lovely lush body) (Her lush body language mesh emulsifiers like a rose among thorns, so its my beloved among maidens)
I write bullet hole black hole black hair hazards and happenings I happen to encounter Taryn’s lush body hell hazards esoteric water channels Hazard lazarus low laugh noise near name gnosis (so, Lazarus, how do you feel? I like the light. What was it like? Which is better: death or life? I was a little surprised… wasn’t that much difference) (I stab Lazarus / KILL NOW PAY LATER)
Taryn hazard lazarus lips low harsh noise noise near name gnosis Name now khora cave mouth low lush name gnosis gnosis Gnostic bullet holes hell mythologies Mythologies hell happen haze dark
Language mesh champagne aporias / champagne supernova / supernova goes pop Champagne aporia champagne supernova supernova goes pop hyperpop hell Language mesh middles marsh languages lush champagne pretty lush I wish you a broken heart and a happy new year
Language mesh goose flesh language mesh goose flesh Lush refreshed language mesh: mesh mill corpsegrinder Prepare mill paper mill Mesh mill salt as pepper shaker Quaker reef sharks and quaker sand sharks
I listen to the song .44 Caliber Love Letter by Alexisonfire (This is a .44 caliber love letter straight from my heart) (The 1986 David Lynch film Blue Velvet influenced the lyrics of .44 caliber Love Letter: I’ll have to send you a love letter! Straight from my heart, fucker! You know what a love letter is? It’s a bullet from a fucking gun, fucker!)
The book writes love letters to Yahweh and scroll letters transmutes into silver bullets Letter levitate pastoral letters lift shed ben adam pseudepigrapha Straight fuck book letter syntax / earth epistle epistle pine needles erotic
Language mesh mere mesh Mere mesh more bullets bullet ben adam
I did like a few lines, says Asia. I should have wrote them down.
Did you mean to write “I will sin on it?” says Asia. Ah darn it, I say. Give me a sec… OK I fixed it. I talked to Ann Marie on the phone. How did your conversation with Ann Marie go? Good. I talked about some of our conversations about the Book. She had a suggestion for you of sorts. Oh? What was her suggestions? She herself said that she also had to set aside time for it and be focused state when reading it, and try not to understand everything but experience it like music or being in nature: it’s not entirely about understanding but about experiencing the limits of language pointing to something beyond. That's fair, says Asia. It’s hard not to feel like I should have grabbed onto a thought though sometimes… I did like a few lines. I should have wrote them down. You know, I was just thinking, that typo was very interesting. I thought so too, I say. At first I didn’t think it was a typo when you first mentioned it. What did you find interesting about it? You played around with the word sin earlier in the post, says Asia, and sin goes directly against the teachings on the religion we were talking about processing. I think it could be cool to take bits of the recorded conversations and play around with the wording and weave it into the rest of the excerpt, says Asia.
It will take some time to process / Yeah I should just sin on it a bit
All religions, all laws, all books of old, if one reads them, it’s like turning your face backwards and examining words which have long gone extinct. All this originates from the side of death.
Apostasy comes and the lawless one revealed ben adam, lawless one, man of sin man of perdition I sit in sin side sinister and side of woman Woman wounds me antinomian word
Antialiased antinomianism (I try to rid myself of my thumb prints and taboos) (I modulate antinomian archegrammar) I modulate antinomian .44 caliber love letter / this is a .44 caliber love letter straight from my heart christened by her bullet stations of the cross
Antinomian mallet quartet / I sin sextet
Antinomian angles arc light animated lights / imaginary interior floodlights in Bonnie and Clyde’s Death Car Interiorly illuminated bullet holes Bullet holes and blood stains sketch the language mesh
I try to rid myself of my thumbprints and taboos (set your body ablaze: hollow words will burn and hollow men will burn) My thumbprints and taboos sometimes slow the transformation of the Book (Book expressing Book: Book prophesying Book) Book transforms to Book and Book maps Book even if I tried to actively stop such a process, but I desire a certain Book transmorgifier efficiency of optimization (I imagine in the future I eventually realize the struggling / wrestling / frustration proves integral to the process of letting Book be BOOK) (I try to rid myself of my thumbprints and taboos so I can explore and experiment beyond my stylistic and mental limitations)
BIZARRE STYLES the most electrifying footage ever filmed, with two of today’s top porno stars giving their wildest and weirdest performances ever!
Bizarre ben adam Bizarre ben bullet holes and blood stains Blood trace bark bodies ben adam bodies oak ark ash often blood Blood often blood my body bark breakers beakers pornographies ben body bell bizarre pornographies Pornographies aporia pornographies
Antinomian pornographies pornographic ben adam ben adam blood antinomian anarchies
Cannibal Hymn Christ Remixed With Bonnie And Clyde
Many bones many pieces slow cooked cotton candy cannibals Cotton candy cannibal hymn Cannibal hymn cannibal hyena a woman who lives on her fathers and feeds on her mothers I gather cotton candy as sugar gods and cinnamon gods (I fell in love with a cinnamon girl) Girl gods sugar and spice and everything nice
A type of lantern fly, says Asia. They look cool and I just really like the picture like they are all in almost the exact same pose and something about the angle of the front leg just looks cool, she says. They are doing a little synchronized dance, I say. Have you done a dance class? My parents put me in a dance class when I was really young, says Asia. I thought it was too girly. You were definitely made of snips and snails and puppy dog tails and not sugar and everything nice – a bit of spice though. Definitely was, says Asia.
I carve cotton candy iconoclastic abstract geometric patterns Candy immelmanns iconoclasm chloroplasts plastic cataclysm cannibals I cure candy candy swashes the backbones and seizures the hearts of the gods I eat the red crown and swallow the green one
I let the repetitions I let the repetitions rush repetitions Let repetitions within time outside time ramp repetition rain Repetitions rain rind rain slant rhyme radar Repetitions reuse rain: I recycle texts and texts cut in and out kairos Texts swerve swarm cave khora clipped comic Nonlinear repetitions / nonlinear rhizomes (rhizomes always sprawl and interconnect nonlinearly)
I do not approach a text at once or even in a single duration: I encounter texts simultaneously many times and alltime, a naked singularity ONCE A naked singularly ONCE OUROBOROS If I cannot read a text in a single instant, then why do I insist on writing a linear, chronologically consistent interaction and (mis)interpretation of the text? No, I must cut open my own method and find a different kind of consistency and consistencies I write consistently (consistencies) through cave mouth khora and cave mouth kairos: cathedrals cloistering katabasis and kenosis cut open open Open open stone: I stack stone slang curves and sling spirals, and the texts do not occupy canvas spaces but building brutalist buildings or carved in circular ruins A different type of flattening: not flat in bodily space and activity but flatter in its relations and connections Stations of the cross flattens: eloi eloi lema sabacthani total desert deflation the desert city (the shepherd strikes and Christina scatters)
I swallow the cross I swallow the cross of Jesus Christ I cannibal Christ and I eat his left testicle as green crown and his right testicle as red crown I feed on the lungs lamprey Yahweh and I live on her heart and her magic (You have a lovely child, you know. I know, she’s a great baby. She’s so goofy. I think me and her would get along if we met. She’s pretty friendly. She must get it from your husband (she laughs). I never met you in person, so what if you’re like a witch bitch cannibal? Damn, I’ve found been find out. Nice try but I’m not going to let you cook me in a cauldron)
I need the resistance of a hard surface I cut the surface or scissor surfaces and its rhythms do not limit me but instead open body Open body open movement most microcosms Open bodies open movements mischief mercuries Moon mercuries more repetition Canvas repeats floor repeats medicine cabinet Cabinet khora and korakoram
New arts need new techniques
I reinvent a repetition round stone rhizomes My techniques teem fish school total / This fish sign a symbol for early Christians
Techniques tallow mellow march techniques: techniques immediate intense towers (TOWERS OF DESIRE on the surface he was a perfect all-american boy… but beneath lurked dark and unnatural urges that were soon to explode) Towers totem techne: techniques terra and taryn Taryn tetrahedron heaps spoonfuls of chewing tobacco / travel unnatural nocturne
I repeat night I repeat night differently
I name unnatural I nocturne unnatural names
I describe the Bonnie and Clyde Death Car I reinscribe the Bonnie and Clyde Death Car as tattoo scriptures
Inside options: Arvin hot water heater Outside options: steel cover for spare tire, front and rear bumper covers
Front and rear bumper cars Yahweh yearlings / Yardbird boasting the upper partials on Cherokee reharmonizations)
Steel cover for spare tire, front and rear bumper covers, a chrome greyhounds radiator cap ornament, Potter’s Trunk and safety glass windows
What the heck is a potter’s trunk (The Potter’s Trunk for the 34 Ford Sedans or Phaetons… a form fit trunk that fit tight up against the body… The spare tire could be mounted on the back of the trunk…) (Facts stolen from a thread from the Antique Automobile Club of America internet forums… Thank, Paul Dubin)
A chrome greyhound radiator cap ornament, Potter’s Trunk and safety glass windows
Chrome language mesh Chrome language mesh marked one Chrome language mesh vibratile monad eyelid / eyelid she lights the lights Eyelid lamppost new technique transformation Language mesh medicines / transformations
An erect eyelid monolith Monolith motors I write form a rhizome and increase territory by deterritorialization teenage death song radio monoliths I write night eye monoliths minotaur mysticisms Night light I write night eyelid mysticisms and eyelid monasticisms
I cleave chrome khora I cleave clearing chrome language mesh mess (checking in is easy… checking out is hell MOTEL HELL) Mess hell hostages stage right language mesh Mesh mash handball alchemies
I recycle an extracted human eye as a dollhouse doorknob Red fire engine languages language mesh Mesh mashed potatoes potash languages
Fuck the book – or fuck what conception or constraints I have of the Book I write logos and I prophesy logos, and although the language of chrome automobiles celluloid cinema language meshes enmeshed materials and matters liturgical mass mother letters circumspects and almost light kisses her logos I must mine mania madnesses mysticisms Fuck the open Book but let the Book KRYSXTRYN and Book Asia Rhizome revive restless nonlinear materials non-euclidean bodies Loop elliptic bodies hang hyperbolic bodies
From here on: light-created, concealed, contained in the covenant, entering the rose, emitting seed into her
From here: where here From here, anywhere: anywhere anarchy anywhere alchemy anywhere antinomian
From here where here anywhere: any where word anywhere woman her logos lights the lights
From here on, into and onto here Here onto Ben: Ben Book Brilliance Brilliances baptize Ben Adam: Ben Adam and Son of man Child of Humanity Human One From here on, Human One
The Semantic Field Of Facts
There are four main types of classic sideshow attractions: The Single-O is a single attraction; for example, a single curiosity like the Bonnie and Clyde Death car” or Hitler’s Staff car, a “Giant Rat” (actually usually a nutria or other unusual animal) a “What Is It?” (often a convincing but artificial monstrosity like the Fiji Mermaid) or a geek show often billed as “See The Victim of Drug Abuse”
I’ve seen the Bonnie And Clyde Death Car in person: it had less bullet holes than I thought it would I expected the car to be shredded and barely hanging together but 100 bullet holes looks like less of an impact than one expects Perhaps the police officers went to the Storm Trooper academy of sharpshooting and they artificially inflated the numbers of hits in the reports Perhaps the bullet holes hid in the car interior and maneuvered like a swarm of magic bullets
I car crater / meteor monstrosity (ha ha ha… black materia. Ha ha ha… call meteor)
I car crater alchemical catastrophes / meteor emergent mortal emergent brain metals / mockingbird mandrakes Mockingbird mandrakes monstrosities the map says we’re fucked
I have to continually remind myself: ben, don’t fear making messes because this mess means human experience This mess means gospel of thomas logion two let him who seeks continue seeking until he finds Seeking secrets slow mess the messes coated slime surfaces Slime slings prophecy aporia alchemy and O cook the cave mouth magmas: mortar magma alchemy I let texts and material contaminate and infect my bodies Taryn transmutes Tetragrammaton titrated into my temple Temple femur shattered tabernacle
Old corpse corpuscular older ouroboros
(My brain whiplashes words words wine beware languages I immerse myself in hermetic language Kabbalah language alchemy language occult language language languages Sublimated sulfur languages I baptize bodies esoteric messes / my newly invented gnosticisms) (my newly invented gnosticisms Philip K. Dick gnosticisms archaic mysticisms)
Old corpse oozes copper Corpse oozes copper crosses a solidified elemental metal body Jesus Christ
Old corpse ossias ossa ouroboros overlapping blacks Blacks blended block blacks old beast of the earth and older beast from the sea Old corpse older beast from the sea cave mouth
I feel my ghosts as ghosts in ghosts I feel my gods in gods as ghosts in ghosts Christianities creep subtle into my creep / curved cranium crash cranium comic curves Christianities sum several bones bound book my books brook Christian corpse Corpses call to me clarion / Christianities check chairs bone china
Corpse cave call craters camera columns: column meteor Cave mouth granites grimoires / copper hermetic qabalah Copperhead hermetic copperhead grotesque godhead (Gruesome! Grotesque! Horrendous! The goriest orgy that ever bloodied the screen! Never before such savage butcher and barbaric torture! WOMAN FROM DEER RIVER) Cave mouth grotesque gestates metamorphic rock / hermaphrodite rhizome
My mouth opens Christian corpses cascade psalm cataclysms My mouth opens Christian caves carved apocalypses
Corpse cave caves camera avalanche columns Columns camera copper cool jazz grasshopper jazz Grasshopper grasps jazz grass globes globular cinema Grasshopper grave glamour photography Cave breaks off my thighbone disintegrates into grasshopper hordes locust swarms Cave breaks off my thighbone book late lunar bombardment torah scroll Thighbone blizzards bathhouse hermetic hatchetfish Thighbone burns cave ash ash autumn auguries I wrap my thighbone in intestines and I ingest murder of crows midnights
I find some facts about the Bonnie and Clyde Death Car:
1934 Ford Model 730 Deluxe Sedan with a large eighty-five HP V8 and Firestone 525 /550 x 17 tires and originally owned by Ruth Warren
(I steal these Bonnie and Clyde Death Car facts from the website Texashideout.tripod.com Jean-Michel Basquiat found his facts from Gray’s Anatomy and from hobo signs and from record covers and created a semantic field of meaning: meaning acquired through appropriation and transformation of facts I too want to utilize whatever facts I come across and whatever facts that interest me, and I want to arrange the facts into a fuller field and flooded field I want to arrange and transform the fact field into desert deluge supernal dark Desert deluge dense supernal dark darker distances I assemble facts and Book bricleour facts field female / various fires and forests Fires burning fires without being consumed I fuck facts and fuck the facts and I birth facts womb empty womb turmoil as tumble (through the turmoil and the tinfoil)
A recurring figure or ostinato: four different strands of musical material of contrasting character developed simultaneously throughout the work Refrain develop simultaneously / interactions combinations co-operations oppositions (I do not simultaneous swarm but I simultaneous swing) (I swing simultaneous prophecy jazz swing baseball swing)
He told me then eh was thinking of changing the group and changing the music, to set different sounds… He asked me to play with him
I think of changing the music and changing the sound
Cave sounds bone: bone turntable torah thighbone blends bone ends Cave sounds in the house of the dawn Cave sounds in the house of evening twilight Cave sounds in the house of dark cloud Cave sounds in the house of rain and mist, of pollen, and grasshoppers
I prophesy doubles I prophesy doppelganger gods gown grasshoppers I prophesy doubles and triples and doubletime (WE DOUBLE-DARE YOU to take the “hundred horrors” of the screen’s most daring double shock show!! We DOUBLE-DARE YOU to take ‘Berserk’ test in the theater lobby – at your own risk!! WE DOUBLE-DARE YOU to take the ‘torture garden’ fight seeds and plant them at midnight!)
I prophesy doubles and I interact facts icons incarnations I interact facts flow intricate eye insects intimate insects Intimate immanent insects
I interact intimate immanent insects killer instinct I interact facts flesh flesh interprets flesh I interact facts dialogue facts dig heteroglossia I dialogue rhizome riverroam facts: facts discover facts
Back to the facts, jack! Hit the road jack fifty ways to leave your lover
Original purchase price $835 in 1934 Original color cordoba grey (Jean-Michel Basquiat copies Gray’s Anatomy and I animate human body jars jaguar gods I animate human bodies jars ajar jaguar god orgasms an orgasmic geology and geology Human body maps god to god a jumbled jar gestation My bone body burns jazz anatomy Bone burrs jazz anatomy auto autopsy Anatomy autopsy apothecary
This lady creates my body dead black cloud taxi cab corpses
Corpse or crowd vultures
Black corpse or black crowd vultures I dream the book beard of vultures Vulture visions vine I need the resistance of the hard surface Hard surface surplus energetic excesses
Vulture vine free verse free jazz Vintage free jazz double quartet (WE DOUBLE DARE YOU)
I nerd the resistance of the hard surface
I remove the surfaces only vultures I dream vultures and I remove her surfaces summa language mesh
Language mesh language mesh
Language mesh Language mesh marked one Language mesh mercury matrix Language mesh vibratile monad eyelid Eyelid interior eye erotic eye cosmic egg Eyelid interior eye time egg
I imagine time as a hard surface: I discard the hard surface I tent time softer time: soft flesh soft surfaces soft sea infusions I infuse time with softer time / language mesh language mesh I mesh noise time prophecy and time father soft I experiment a soft eye and a liquid eye: eye inert insert softer ink
I animate my body facts Bone facts bare exposed bone / bone juts through my skin spiral compound fracture serpent slip discs Serpent slip discs serpent son discs I slow slip discs serpent sun discs I slow the disc as a slower silo and I store time / time spills out overlapping sprawls insect crawls I slow sun experimental stars fishing line eyes I slow sun alien stars swim solar system eyes I eye solar system syntax semantic attack
Sun disc sticks faults flesh: my flesh colds facts she lights the lights ben lobotomy She lights intraorbital ben blue lobotomies I open my eye soft laboratory
Lighthouse Christianities Lighthouse Christianities charis hauntologies
Cave Mouth And Tent Peg Intersections
It becomes long, deep: it widens extends, narrows. It is a constricted place; there are asperous places. It is frightening, a fearful place, a place of death. In is called the place of death because there is dying. It is place of darkness; it darkens; it stands over dark. It stands wide-mouthed; it is narrow-mouthed. It has mouths which pass through. I place myself in the cave. I enter the cave.
I find this quote in Barbaric, Vast, and Wild: A Gathering of Outside and Subterranean Poetry From Origins to Present, edited by Jerome Rothenberg and John Bloomberg-Rissman The book attributes it to an Aztec definition of cave and precipice, and I find its source in another Jerome Rothenberg collection, Technicians Of The Sacred (Bernardino de Sahagún, Florentine Codex: General History of Things of New Spain, translated by Charles E. Dibble and Arthur J.O. Anderson) In my efforts to discover the source, I read about a place called Chicomoztoc – the place of seven caves – a mythological cave of emergence for a few groups in Mesoamerica The repetition and subtle shifts and variations in the perspective-language of the cave-mouth-dark breathes black geology and dark karst mythology into my own languages My languages venture sharp-cut landscape: my languages venture subterranean and desert (deserts stacked deserts deserts overlapping deserts desert superimposed deserts) I entered the dark word walking insect the worm that walks I enter the cave
Tent peg into pine tar flesh Tent peg plastic figure waves blue warble water Warble marble mirrored marble waters wattle Wattle woman basketwork benjamin tent peg Tent peg chromatic durations layers combine into regular pulsing / pulsing tent peg
Tent peg four different strands of musical material of contrasting character – developed simultaneously
Simultaneous tent peg scriptures
Tent peg seating arrangement tent peg seating arrangements
Tent peg indeterminacy: aleatoric tent peg
Tent peg into pine tar flesh Tent peg partitions my brain into barnacle braingels blastoise Tent peg bard text baring knife needles and pins (I saw her today I saw her face) Tent peg beamed into forehead breamed feather bog jelly joyous bodies genuine My forehead feathers streaming flesh diamonds / tent pegs poked every facet Tent peg packs pores aporia feather steams stuck seattle slew / my body mules racing machines machine march tent pegs Pegs press katechon clouds and clouds Pegs press pine katechon cave caves I enter the cave
I enter the cave: it is deep – a difficult, a dangerous place, a deathly place It is dark it is light it is abyss
I enter cave bone clavicle chasm I enter cave open bone bone ouroboros Cave open bone oracle I enter cave empty inside echo and this lady who cremates the dead black as a crow
Cave crow cedars crypt: crypts tent peg crayons Tent peg crayons carcass / black conte compass Tent peg red into grey grows tumble down late rodeo roses filled with early snow I show cave bone bare ben body tent peg caves
Medium is the message, I say to Asia. Often the method used to transmit information is as or more important than the message. I bring it up because I was thinking about experimental and avant-garde art… Like is the way and style I write in transmitting a theme all its own… If it is, I hope it is one of anarchic and flat relation. Breaking down boundaries. No hierarchy, just being. Being love or something… Art is useless but governments all want to censor and regulate the art. Because often creation itself makes new myth or story. The story we tell ourselves changes. Art changes the inside, not the outside. But the inside is as expansive as the outside. I hope the way I write is anarchic insides. I write anarchic and the story itself – the medium – is anarchic and our myth is anarchic and as a result our interior too becomes anarchic, I say. I think your writing is that, says Asia. Its overall format and structure defy expectations. It’s not narrative or poetry: it’s its own beast and people have to read differently when they read it, she says.
An anarchic cave mouth: an anarchic tent peg
Tent peg pig destroyer
I convert most of the original points into melodic lines, chords, and swarms of sound Sound swell tent spikes my skull sputters and stutters Skulls stutter light scatter / scatter scorpion languages
I cannot fear repetition but I realize the repetition real rhizomes real fields Field repetition real field the foreign flow of my bodies Bodies cave repetition cavernous bodies carnivore Tent peg twists texts pattern-welded damascus / I field texts flooded repetition
Tent peg teeters texts twist tall: tall tent tall tabernacle
I learn not to fear the aphorism and the one-liner
Tent peg texts tabernacle textures textured tall tall tehom Tall tehom Taryn repeats tehom water in snow Her snow secretes secret water transformations / this tent of transformations this cave of transformations Taryn tall tehom towers tour texts: texts son of man son of perdition
Tall Taryn tenor bares blonde teeth teeth bombs bomb-omb gospel of thomas
Jesus said: let no one who seeks not stop seeking until that person finds; and upon finding, the person will be disturbed; and being disturbed, will be astonished; and will reign over the entirety
I seek cave mouth and search with telescope tent peg Tent peg microscope Adam Kadmon macrocosms I seek gospel cave gullet gall texts or tent tessellations I push the tent peg into my brain / trepanation revelation I push tent peg ben brain brawl gospels I brawl gospels tent my brain tent peg push pus play (Then Jael Heber’s wife took a nail of the tent, and took an hammer in her hand and went softly unto him, and smote the nail into his temple, and fastened it into the ground: for he was fast sleeping and weary. So he died)
I enter cave weary and I die cave I enter cave death bone bobbing thread / black rope rhizome ben bodies twist wretched cave rhizomes
I follow the rhizome by rupture I follow rhizome rupture lengthens rupture Rupture lengthens rupture prolonged play / pronged aporia Ben aporia spikes bones in cave ground aid I relay the time of flight through my flesh flatter flesh Fugitive flesh varies myth: myth mothlight flesh varies Fugitive flesh ben feathers and I produce the most abstract and torturous lines / ben bodies broken directions
I search salt cave crossed out gospels I scratch gospel of thomas twin tehom: the abyss of seeking and the abyss of finding I steal abyss bay salt secret waters water bone cave brew I brew cave oceans Oceans open cave mouth gospel magma When I find, I find human bodies When I find, I find human bodies transformed insect bodies magma gospels complete metamorphosis / Christ body as cocoon or chrysalis
I enter cave dark in the house of dawn I enter cave dark in the house made of evening twilight
I enter cave dark in the house made of dawn and the tent dark texts dark houses
Tent peg and tent pin into my pinniped brain as grenade pin and erotic pinups
Tent peg into temple something like cohesionless skips skittles constellations
Tent peg parts red sea Tent peg parts yam suph yahweh / I will fasten him like a peg in a secure place and he will become a throne of honor to his ancestral house
Ancestral house ark made of dawn Ancestral house halves ark made of evening twilight
Taryn evening twilight tints blue tehom then black tehom Taryn evening twilight tines abyss times time tehom
The Ten-in-One tent peg chisels total tapestry and total tent revival / ben freaks monstrous revival Freak monsters Yahweh the empty tomb revives Empty tomb revives female fire she lights the lights Female fire lights the lights and resuscitates (I renew my BLS credentials and the first major change in some time: one continues doing chest compressions when the AED charges for the shock)
Taryn lights the lights cave torches and I enter cave dark-light supernal dark-light I enter cave death Taryn tehom torches and her light lams passover roasted fire dark
I enter cave dark drive dye in the house of evening twilight Cave carbon kilas dark raw and cooked in the house made of dark cloud I enter cave copper dark crisis on infinite earths in the house made of rain and mist, of pollen, of grasshoppers
Grasshoppers grand guinol Grasshopper gibson girls Grasshopper gowned guts (Some animals get away with murder, rape, torture Doesn't it make your blood boil? Well THE HUNTER did something about it! HUNTER (WILL GET YOU!))
Grasshopper grammarss Grasshopper genealogies and generations Grasshopper guts graphomania (Five girls this week! How many next week? KILLER’S DELIGHT)
I delight dark I delight desert dark dark detournement
I delight dark cave death I delight dark dye so the son of humanity has come as a dyer
Cave kills my body a cross Cross crucifies my body cave Cave cross khora crucifies body spaced cave
Cave reaches me as khora and cave reaches me as tabernacle Tent of Meeting names crucifixions; crucifixion cancer constellation immediate / dark cave entrance
Cave crystal khora: come and take a peek! KEYHOLE EXPOSE
It’s not filler – it’s exploration
It’s not filler – it’s exploration (my new creative motto)
Exploration not explanation (explanations come to an end somewhere)
She takes an old corpse and breaks off the thigh bone
Old corpse cave cave Old overlapping corpses cave cave body khora / my corpse calls to me ben death Old corpse cave cave camera columns Camera copper column cool jazz caves grasshopper cinema Grasshopper cinema cameras glamour photography Cave breaks off up thighbone book blast Torah scroll Thighbone tailbone paper mario the thousand year door
I enter the cave as a thousand year door I enter cave as an inappropriate paper airplane
The Book Falls Open Collapse
This isn’t a characteristic of my current writing style, by the way, I say to Christina. No, I didn’t think so, says C. I thought it was probably an older passage. It was a confessional passage mixed with stuff, I say. I want to try an eclectic and polystylistic approach for future writing. Like a talking head on a reality show? says C. Yeah. I like it! says C. I like a million footnotes or asides or breaking the fourth wall, says C. Asia feels I’m too detached from my writing, I say. She thinks first person can act as a good jump scare for the reader. Like surprise them. Yes! says C. I like a good wink and a nod to bring me in. Asia suggested a metacommentary in an opposite style, like long flowing sentences. Interesting idea! says C. I have been working from multiple notebooks simultaneously as well, I say. Doing like an Elliott Carter thing where two opposing texts interweave and collide and clash in weird ways, I say.
(In it the four instruments are individualized, each being given its own character embodies in a special set of melodic and harmonic intervals and of rhythms that result in four different patterns of slow and fast tempi with associated types of expression)
Cave mouth mutinies mouth hellmaw more cave Cave mouth more textures tear cave
(Beware of the Night Crawlers… Their clutches will disintegrate you! THE NAVY VS. THE NIGHT MONSTERS a nightmare come alive… terrifying acid blessing monsters multiply by the millions… ready to cremate the human race! All new in terrifying color)
Cave mouth terrifying color Carton cave calcium color / color blood blur bodies Blur body blurred bodies brush caves Cave moth mutinies mouth hellmaw heliotrope and heliotrope gray / globster grey hansa yellow Elohim haste color Hansa yellow Yahweh the human one only color Human One only oranges and the grove jars genealogies Orange grove jars jaws genealogies genealogies disrupted desert rhizomes Rhizomes home hauntologies herta hopscotch genealogy interruptions
Cave mouth microphones phantom big cat clusters Cat clusters crisis teeth axes Cat axe cataclysms
Axe arc Axe electric arc alcohol aleatoric Any axe and any axe and Any axe an axe and Any axe an axe as the first dream of the high tension line stepdown transformer Any axe an axe anvil orchres ACME at the second dream of the high tension line stepdown transformer (I transform cave mouth into axe swung human mouth, both individuals and characters in a string quartet)
I machine the minimal axe into the minimal cave mouth multiple into mappings Cave mouth airs agma amul gog and magog aether Gog and magog orange grove groundless human one Cave mouth motions again aeon hell and archon hell, axes hugged aether (the music begins to deepen and broaden out; already themes re-emerge, transform, but the textures despite the multilayering remain transparent)
(Lizzie Borden took an axe And gave her mother forty whacks When she saw what she had done She gave her father forty-one)
Cave mouth motions mother letters Mouth monster letters severed a letter opener Cave mouths mothers letters aleph apostates: apostates alpha and omega Cave mouth mothers more machine mist aeon hell smoke and archon hell fog Her hell hastes alar algae Alar algae aims axe diatom disintegrations Diatom extra dimensions axe diminished sevenths Altar algae aether agon Axe agon axe forty whacks wick words Agon against sends alluring angels: alluring angels alluring axes
(Another Borden now dead Lizzie hit him on the head Up to heaven he will sing On the gallows she will swing)
I dream god gallows gallows ghosts Dream gallows rose low Rose sitting on five sturdy leaves paradigm of five fingers / I chop saints’ fingers with various sized axes (various roses various axes) I dream god gallows glowing roses: I glow roses bloody ghosts black paintings gallows
Gallows jazz swing serpents: hoop snake hallucinations
In reality, Lizzie’s stepmother suffered from eighteen or nineteen blows; her father suffered eleven blows
Rose axe blow blows dandelion leaves leviathan
Rose axe blow bench presses behemoth / ben behemoth boasts Son of Man Son of Man
Conversations With Asia 06/25/2020 2:52 AM
My cat woke me up this morning but knocking over a jar of paint water on my desk, says Asia. His water bowl was empty. Was that his way of getting your attention? I guess so – it worked. I’m worried about meeting with my rector, I say. What if she thinks I’m a nut? Haven’t you talked to her before? I have frequently. She’s one of the people I share my writing with. I think it will be fine, says Asia. I don’t think the whole prophet thing is actually that big on an issue. You don’t actually say or do anything crazy with it. You just write poetry and the poetry is about the love of God, says Asia.
I prophesy the axe
On the Day of Lord, blood will flow from the words, says John the Baptist. The stones of the houses will come alive and kill their owners. That day is here. He gave the axe. Now I give it to you.
I prophesy the axe
I prophesy the axe against air axe asp ant colony Christianity asks axes ape escape awe Awe amputates axe axe arrays awe / cedar breaks and the gift of awe
I prophesy any axe (This is my heart, take it. God is inside of us. The devil is outside of us, in the world all around us. I pick up an axe and cut the devil’s throat.)
I prophecy my axe cave mouth I prophesy my axe cave mouth moth moon emperors: golden emperor indian purple emperor god-emperor of man (The Emperor sits on a ram-adorned throne, a symbol of Mars)
Axe answers axe the bone broth breathing cave mouth Cave mouth monarchs miniature axes (Axeman of New Orleans / a serial killer active in New Orleans, Louisiana – and surrounding communities, including Gretna, Louisiana – from May 1918 to October 1919)
Thus, four different strands of musical material of contrasting character are developed simultaneously throughout the work
A work for 4 men – who converse, discuss, argue (in re ‘politik’), fight, shake hands, shut up – then walk up the mountainside to view the firmament
Cave mouth clusters khora Cave mouth curtains crushed khora then open (Khora reaches me and as the name Khora her name Krystal cave mouth Broken bone entrance / bunched bone arc) (Khora arch agon axes)
Cave mouth khora arc anat open tempo / step pyramid plucked play Plucked play bartok pizzicato Cave khora mouth secret agent / triple or quadruple secret agent Revolver Ocelot
Revolver roller over: over Franz Marc’s blue horses and the blue rider Blue axe appaloosa the powerfully amplified ark: powerfully simplified rounded outlines of the horses’ echoes
Horse hover caves crow mouth and crow cavern
Horse caves axe khora crow cuts across my mouth: myth mouth and mysterious mouth
Blue axe arks horses: axes echo rhythms of the landscape background I voice horses harmolodic khora landscape Landscape cave cup and cup khora
This cup of blessing, which should rest on five fingers, and no more – like a rose sitting on five sturdy leaves, paradigm of five fingers this rose rows cup of blessing
I blade blue axe parallax propeller blue horses Blue horses blue cups again clusters / common cricket Gospel of Thomas (Has my experiment in writing through the Gospel of Thomas already a failure? Perhaps, but not a failure due to the writing but due to my won wandering mind boredom I try again to overcome my boredom) (The powerfully amplified simplified rounded outlines of the horses echo rhythms of the landscape background, uniting animals setting vigorous harmonious harmonic whole)
(Is any of this writing holding together? Or does the atmospheres herd rust and the Book falls open collapse?)
Jesus says: Let him who seeks cease not to seek until he finds: when he finds, he will wonder: and when he wonders, he will reign, and reigning, he will have rest
I seek I seek something else and something different I seek Elliott Carter’s String Quartet No. 2 (It is out of the interactions, combinations, co-operations, and opposition of these that the details of music discourses as well as the large sections are built) I seek text and texts, and in text, Khora Tetragrammaton Taryn I seek Taryn and Asia Rain in text and texts
I prophesy axe and arkestra awe gospel Gospels color cup khora
This cup cures chords curves This cup cuts new notation notated or annotated gnosis Annotated antinomian gnosis
Who are you? Doesn’t matter. What do you want? To kill you.
Christianity kills but cup crucifies Christ Cup crucifies crucifies ben bodies crux Son of Man
I perform the cup tone clusters hands forearms feet / improvisation arising through the statistical nature of timbre transformations A continuous thread of contrapuntal material contributed to the cluster effects
(I find writing dated from 10/29/22, approximately 12 months ago:
I cut the length too An assemblage like this one is by its nature an anthology of versions I cut the length too An assemblage like this one is by its nature an astrology of versions visions veridon volumes – WRITE MORE ALMOST – repetition alternate repeating sentences Between the phrase or idea: flesh fuck flesh)
(I have indeed absorbed some of this language play and particular repetition of languages I must explore more difference / repetition)
Flesh fuck flesh (1917 skeletal diagram of Tyrannosaurus published by Henry Fairfield Osborn) Flesh fuck flesh open cup empty cup
I claim cup and cup cuts open holy graal cup curves blue Curved blue: straight blue then curved blue Cone blue pyramid and pink pigment pyramid / and all beings flaming suffering and all being flaming sorrow
Tent peg pins pink pine tar flesh Tent peg partitions my brain: my brain barnacle braingels blastoise Tent peg into beamed forehead let no one deceive you in any way; for that will not come until the rebellion comes first and the lawless one revealed, the one destined for destruction Tent peg texts tabernacle textures: textures tag tall tehom Tall tehom tall tower cups and you know that is not restraining him so that he may be revealed when his time comes…
I always want to (re)write and (re)interpret the Bible – the Christian Bible – a lifelong project I try to reinvent the bible, and I play pastiche and parody but love I love the gospels as gospels but to eat and take them into my gut requires total disintegration
Tent peg plays texts thessalonians totem thessalonians Tent peg pivots text pitch thessalonians tabernacles Taller tabernacle sunflowers thessalonians and the mastery of lawlessness already works but only until the one who now restrains him is removed
Tent peg khora katcheon eschaton tent peg Tent peg purrs big cat khora tiger taryn khora and katechon Tent peg brays bottomless pit ice pick skull iron tent peg
Tent peg tiletalk / uneven tessellations I tile tent peg strange spaces and play spaces I tile tent peg plucked string stonehenge and sea hinge Stonehenge door hinge hangs tent peg from the hole in my forehead
Tent peg tall tell tale tehom tunnel apocalypse Tunnel not tunnels: verb verb syntax Syntax fuck syntax verb verb tunnel Tent peg tunnel turtle tunnel / tent peg syntax fuck syntax
(Apocalypse arachnids apocalypse / tent peg sprawls)
Tent peg eschaton Eschaton alchemy
Apocalypse art axe cuts aleph Apocalypse asp axe cuts aleph Aleph chops aleph fan flesh Aleph chops crops crop circle city aleph and aleph avas apocalypse Aleph axe alpha axe murders
Tent peg hammers hell tabernacle: hanging Son of Man Tent peg hockets hell temple, a tabernacle nested in throats (human throats and throats hummingbird) Tabernacle nests throats tackled throng thorns Throng stick thistles ben bone stems stems tent peg tumors Ben bones stink fetid tuberosities tubers stick stomach stretch mushroom (hallucinogenic mushroom human hands) Tent peg polish cuts hands (this work requires additional technological components and / or amplification)
I work text sheds additional texts I work cave chasm and cave chaos my hands hold text sands and texts saltwaters I work chaosmos cave cask cave
It becomes long, deep: it widens extends, narrows. It is a constricted place; there are asperous places. It is frightening, a fearful place, a place of death. In is called the place of death because there is dying. It is place of darkness; it darkens; it stands over dark. It stands wide-mouthed; it is narrow-mouthed. It has mouths which pass through. I place myself in the cave. I enter the cave.
Tent Pegs And Axes
Taryn tent peg plugs tangent twelve bar blues turnaround I turnaround transformations: turtle transforms tortoise transforms machine transformations
I taproot direct text transformations
Nag Hammadi harlots Yahweh of Hosts hauntology Nag Hammadi hauntologies hangings / hanging ghosts nag hammadi Paraphrase of Shem derdekeas desert Derdekeas deconstruction screwdrivers desert / darkness stirred and noise frighteners spirit
Scripture appears to me in dream Scripture mixed with noise appears to me in dream, and the noise too nomos scripture gnosis: scripture noise sounds scripture scripture Scripture scripture sounds noise noise
Tent peg tunnels through my skull cerebral bore book Book balls tunnels then blades tunnels brain O Tannenbaum / crucified Christina chaosmos Critical hit Christina ninja star tessellations
Scripture sculpted noise absurd naked city Scripture scalds absurd starcraft contain planet
Tent peg packs pillbus twelve bar blues blurs twelve-tone row rack of lamb then rabbit (how goodly are your tents O Jacob! Balaam saw the entrance of the Jewish tents: how godly are the tents of Shiloh and the Temple, where the Jews offer sacrifices to atone for their sins)
Tent peg plays atonement as metamorphic rock creative process Tent peg pliers plus plus atonement a human skull squeezed in a vice Vice vox voice vision visions noise nested scripture and scripture inseparable from noise / now noise noises
Noise noir knock knock jokes
(Knock knock. Who’s there? Says. Says who? Says me, that’s who!)
(Knock knock. Who’s there? Ho, ho. Ho, ho, who? You know, your santa impression could use a little work!)
Noise noise open door tent peg
I’m using modes now, because I’m trying to get more form in the free form
Fresh form floor fault: tectonic fault tetragrammaton Taryn Tetragrammaton then sheer shark Out of the eater came fourth food out of the strong came forth sweetness: sweet suite formless Fresh form formless floor: floor fault fresh flesh and blood I kill thirty men son of men and I strip them: I strip them form then formless summer sweet (sweet to the sweets)
Form formless form flatted fifths: fifths fleet in being Form flush with form and I free the form / form everything that rises must converge
I pick the tent peg tents plectrum electrum (Lydian electrum coin – one-third stater – one of the oldest known coins, early 6th century BCE) (a mummified male head covered in electrum, from Ancient Egypt, Roman period, 2nd century CE)
I pick up tent peg pylon dagger and I dig with dagger I dig dagger down tent peg pelican pelican desert caravan I dig desert tent peg archaeology and I make my investigations not from scriptures but from the mysteries I magic mystery meetings within tents – to and through tents – tent meteor tempests
I pitch tent peg tempests music composed around only in one pitch altered in all manners: microtonal oscillations, harmonic allusions, charged in timbre and dynamics
Sweets to the sweets shiloh sheol Sheet suites shiloh sheol el shaddai El Shaddai shatters my femur formless flood and I free the form her waters Her waters float other bloody human heats tent pegs Shiloh sheol shakes shekinah and she shimmers seashells, remnants of my seventh day adventism (Soon he will only be depicted on the Cross, says Lorienne. When I was a Seventh Day Adventist, I say, there was at least a small contingent that felt portrayals of Jesus broke the commandment of idolatry… Of course there’s a risk then of losing the human altogether. For me right now, the Son of man / Child of Humanity / Human One is more important than the Son of God or second person of the Trinity, I say)
Shiloh sheol shakes ragamuffin bones bald awl shekinah Shiloh sea snails salt sea sheol (Shiloh, associating both with Mosheh whose name has the same numerical value as the word Shiloh, and Mashiach)
I drive tent peg into the Temple Tophet and Temple Tower Tophet Tower teeths tempest the mourning dove sets caught in a telephone wire
I read a quotation from Derek Bailey in a March 2002 article of Jazziz magazine I reproduce the quote:
There has to be some degree, not just unfamiliarity, but incompatibility. Otherwise, what are you improvising for? What are you improvising with or around? You’ve got to find somewhere where you can work. If there are no difficulties, it seems to me there’s pretty much no point in playing. I find that the things that excite me are trying to make something work. And when it does work, it’s the most fantastic thing. Maybe the most obvious analogy would be the grit that produces the pearl in the oyster or some shit like that.
I become frustrated with my own stylistic limitations Asia exposes these limitations: she balks at my discontinuities, fragmentations, and the lack of any accessibility and coherence I chastise and abase myself for lacking the techniques and abilities to meet Asia’s expectations I always feel and act in extremes and I feel the urge not only to give up on my writing altogether but to burn and destroy all past works which hopefully inadequate to express anything but nonsense (the play and joy of nonsense but nonsense nevertheless) My brain body flesh wins gazes into a scanner darkly and I feel I utterly fail Asia: I fail to write a poetry and language that she could truly love because of my limited techniques, my constrained abilities…
I have a suggestion, says Asia. Feel free to toss this idea but what if you did your usual thing for two or three paragraph thing for two or three paragraphs and broke it up with a bit of narrative or commentary… Like it gives it something to grab onto. Bonus points if its a drastically different tone… It can still be poetic but drastically reduce the alliteration and have long complicated sentences in that section. That will help break it up, make the reader slow down and give you a chance to emphasize the theme you’ve been building on. Let the piece be a solid anchor that secures the rest, she says.
I reflect on what Derek Bailey said, on the uncomfortable and unfamiliar – Ben and Asia, with our different expectations, styles, tastes, and creative approaches, create anew Our difference creates DIFFERENCE: different text and different scripture The texts transform, molt, and undergo metamorphosis, through Ben and Asia, and the text tannins through together-in-difference and not in spite of it I continue writing despite the doubt and because of the doubt I continue to write to fully develop a fully collaborative process in spaces and differences with Asia I write an impossible writing and writing aporia passions passions apophatic We write towards or afterwards aftermath asymptotes both directions at once
Tent peg papers human temple blood blood temple Jerusalem Tent peg pikes human temple / tabernacle tag tower I fold a paper airplane out of a human skull / otitis media origami
Tent peg predicts gospel of luke hentai tentacles: tentacles trap television tar pit
Tent peg pegasus isosceles triangle Tent peg polar coordinates corner cascade apeirogon Tent peg twelve-tone row Tent peg polygon gone girl god Tent peg porous aporia Play page aporia persecution complex complex intersections stations of the cross Tent peg piledriver temple and tent peg piledriver tabernacle
I play languages tent peg prime numbers Play plant paper rhizome: unrooted roots neighborhood I play the tent peg constellations: stem clusters clay collections collected aggregates I aggregate tent pegs and tent peg violence
(And the Children of Israel did evil in the sight of Yahweh And the Children of Israel did evil again in the sight of Yahweh And the Children of Israel did evil again in the sight of Yahweh) (And he sold them And he strengthened them And he sold them And he gave them And he sold them And he gave them)
I move (perhaps reluctantly or often reluctantly) towards concrete poetry and verbless poetry I fuck with syntax disintegration of the complete sentence into fractal fragments and image imagine image repeated rhizomes I resist but I do not resist fuck fuck with the syntax
Tent peg pierces panic Tent peg pierces cities of the plain plain and the places punctum plane I punch plains plane punctum pulse, the plea or palm of Yahweh Yahweh with a human palm crushes pianissimo then open panic and Yahweh pierces tent peg palm tree garden
Conversations With Asia 06/24/2020 3:32 AM
I have to write because I’m a prophet, I say. And yes, that is crazy. I am a crazy man. Crazy doesn't have to be a bad thing, says Asia. When I write I feel something beyond me, which I guess a Christian would call the Holy Spirit, and it writes for me. I question it a lot though, I say. I mean, you’re probably the least crazy person I have met who calls themselves a prophet, says Asia. But it’s also a red flag to me when someone introduces themselves as a prophet just because of the kind of people I have met before, she says.
(I think I’m still prophesying but in a different way now from a different source, I say. I think so too, says Asia)
And Deborah the prophetess, the wife of Lapidoth, she judged Israel at the time
(“Prophetess” or “Female Prophet” like “Huldah who relayed an important oracle about the need for reform in the time of King Josiah (2 Kings 22:14-20); “Noahdiah” mentioned in Jeremiah 6:14; and the wife of Isaiah (Isaiah 8:3))
Asia prophesies Asia prophesies
Asia prophesies from dress desert From tom cat desert caravan prophesies Asia Rhizome prophesies
Asia prophesies Asia prophesies fuck syntax and then hand sews syntax into my exoskeleton I prophesy oracle insects translated by Asia Prophesies Asia prophesies Asia Prophesies I prophesy without purpose I plow prophesy and the poetry makes nothing happen
I prophesy play plum and play pomegranate Plums pomegranates Asia prophesies Asia Prophesies
An arched entrance three feet wide and four feet wide… At the mouth of the cave the air was terribly foul… discovered to be from large deposits of bat excrement all through the cave… The finding of ashes and other indication of fire, evidently very old… No doubt one of the haunts and residing places of the Apaches… Bones of all kind, scattered around, no less than 500 deer antlers being seen any other evidences of life destruction and feasting… They brought out with them many beautiful specimens of stalactites, and some fine deer antlers which they brought with them to the city…
(I write Elliott Carter time: time counterpoint stratification stretched time structural polyrhythms The use of rhythm and counterpoint expanded to encompass simultaneous different characters and even entire movements, rather than just individual lines I write rhizome rhythm rhythms) (I have been working through multiple notebooks and I work with a certain simultaneous complexity: stanza stratification and paragraph polyrhythms I want to mend and sew together these notebooks the same way Asia mends word and prophecy to my body machine skull skull insects)
Arched entrance immures electric or eclectic elohim (I attempt to rediscover the electric WORD and eclectic VERB: to invent the languages again god laughter I laugh book tide titles I discarded but I discover the languages rediscovered: resurrections Katydids for Krystal / Dragonflies for Krystal Lin)
Arched entrance inks immediate electric or eclectic Elohim Arched entrance Elohim emmas polystylistic pantheism Personal gods disappear from my cave cranium / cranium uranium twisted colossus Skull colossus celluloid insects invade my brain Asia prophesies many rains
Arched entrance Elohim eviscerates entrails: god entrails trace taste a Begotten disembowelment I rephotograph her rock faces / cave or cavern facets Faceted face chasm / close glacier crush
I author arch arc accents: nonharmonic bone Nonharmonic passing tone bones / bone boxcar racer Bone river wrath rhizome raft Raft as rift my body rattles rattler rattles
(Nonharmonic bone binds Book rope prophesy I prophesy bone and blood: human gods gods Asia rhizome)
Arch open apsis / saltwater wake Saltwater wake awake crocodiles
Arch ash axe ark: axe acts of the apostles apostasy Approximate arch: approximate entrance
Asia prophesies Asia Prophesies
Asia prophesies an entrance An entrance where where: her word as her verb Her word waters cave entrance and cave mouth tents: tent of meeting monsters
(“Wife of Lapidoth” in Hebrew can also be translated as “woman of fire” or “woman of torches” (“lightning flashes” in parallel to “Barak” whose name means “lightning”)
Asia Rhizome prophesies and Asia Rhizome judges Asia Rhizome prophesies the cave as chronos and she churns chaosmos: she sway arrays abyss abyss Asia Rhizome prophesies fires and in my attempt to write form into free form blazes bright fires blue: modal blues blues bathers turnaround transformations
Asia Rhizome prophesies my wife to word: I wife word be my husband and I’ll be your wife and I wife word I wife word fires and I wife word fires within fires I wife word her vision lightning flashes / Asia torches towers prom dress god ghosts
Asia Rhizome Woman of Torches Asia Rhizome Woman of Lightning Flashes
Tent peg pulse plasma Tent peg pulse blood plasma artery plus axe attack Axe attack no anchor Axe attack no anchor ape escape (an axe murder in which the victim struck and killed by an axe or hatchet) (Even now, the axe is lying at the root of the tree; therefore every tree that does not bear good fruit will be cut down and thrown into the fire)
(There’s a chicken following me around during my chores and I keep assuming he’s an axe murderer, says Christina. The chicken is an axe murderer? I say. Where does she hold her axe? She doesn’t. That’s why it’s so scary – bold. How does she hold the axe? Why are you so obsessed?! says C. Me and the chicken are secretly conspiring against you so I need to coordinate my actions. I knew it! says Christina.)
Tent twists Tree of Life Tent peg tails tannin Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil Tent peg pauses prepare the way of the Lord make his paths straight Tent pegs anvils absolute axe adonai (an unidentified serial killer known as the Servant Girl Annihilator committed eight murders, mostly those of young women, with an axe in Austin, Texas, in 1884 and 1885. These murders are also nicknamed the “Austin Axe Murders”)
Axe acts acts of the apostles disciplina arcani antinomianism Axe acts angels in america and angels in my apartment Act acts world war one flying ace / Snoopy an axe against the Red Baron Ace any axe acts air and ash Axe acts air and ash angels in my apartment olive acid / beheaded gethsemane beheaded John the Baptist golgotha Ark acts ark and awe / shock and awe horses Franz Marc shock and awe horses (The Fall River Axe Murders Lizzie Borden charged and tried for the hatchet murders of her father and stepmother in 1892. The court and jury found her not guilty, and the murder remains unsolved)
Asia Rhizome prophesies: Even now the axe lies at the roots and the trees, and the cave mouth swallows both axe and tree root
Cave mouth mutinies mouth hellmaw Cave mouth microphones phantom big cats catgut gorguts Cave mouth air magma abyss gog and magog aether gods and magog axes cut tent pegs
Sin Simplicity
Sin simplicity Sin saturn simplicity / antinomian angels Sin sustains sin dominant seventh chords Sin suspends suspends sin seconds and fourths Fourth fugitive flesh flesh fugue Surplus sin we sing sin we thin gin
To surprise myself with sin: this sin does not surprise me My sin surprises not but I sin violent passions chatter the swap scene MARRIAGE FOR FOUR
I love the line holy spirit urban sprawl, says Asia. I like this one too: “I obscure my boundary between a sound and noise my noise…” Was not prepared to be jump scared by the line “Yahweh’s hidden glory hole”. What brilliant word play, she says. I was thinking about your use of “jump scares” in writing, I say. I find the idea inspiring. I’m trying to find ways to write write on autopilot and jump scare myself. If you think about it, says Asia, a big part of writing is playing with the reader’s preconceived expectations whether intentionally or unintentionally. Jump scares just make sense, she says.
I often write too much on autopilot: too much trance and prophecy I want more intentional vision: I want to conjure consistent vision that disrupts my brain with violent dreaming and violent vision transformations
Jump scare sin, a saturnine nuisance nuisance sabbatai sevi Sin jump scares sabbatean sea dirac sea This sea slides slow sin match strikes I match strike sin tension sea I slurp sea human language urban legends / legend trip tetragrammaton Slow sea sing he was the sin king for every passion hungry – TIJUANA TRAMP
Slower sin dirac sea: slower sea dirac sea Dirac cataracts noisy desert abyss I sow abyss sin and I sin abyss now noise now noise experiments I experiment transforming my excrement into gold I experiment a sabbatean and sethian alchemy: a newly invented alchemy ark noise aardvark noise
Night noise nightly noise Night noise napalm / fire nettles napalm apples Night noise normal numbers / I know numbers desert nude door Desert nude door desert noose door Noise newt amphibious numbers androgynous numbers Numbered noise slow sin novas Novella noise slow sin swim Slow sin swarm
The beast that you saw was, and is not, and is about to ascend from the bottomless pit and go to perdition
I apply perdition as a heating pad
I open perdition pure soap bottomless pit and my body showers magma / moth meteorites
Perdition peeks pinprick pinhole mountain peaks
Perdition absurdly pink perdition
Ben beast body beast jars bodies black bear Black bear bottomless pit grizzly gods
Ben beast breasts blossom nude: absolute nude bottomless pit
Bottomless pit pauses pink: pink parrot perdition
Ben sons of perdition pursue strange flesh
I see the beast verb word surprise violence retrograde virus sin RNA world world sin I still sin silkworms boiled alive in their cocoons / premature christian coffins
Sin strips my skin nude skull / skull seeps zerg creep hive hell
I don’t know if you could tell but I think you would consider me a prolific writer, wouldn’t you say? I say to Asia. My process has become very efficient. How I write and the meticulous nature of coping and editing from notebook to notebook and assembling it all together and then typing and editing it… It’s so efficient I often don’t remember a lot of what I write sometimes. Like those lines you love, I would have to look back and see the context. I understand they are lines I wrote because they are ben sounding lines but sometimes the process is a blur because I produce so much. Now that can be a positive. Perhaps I have mastered the flow / trance / mystical state of writing. But I think some people would see it as a negative. Like being a machine. I don’t think being a machine is negative either though, I say. I don’t think the idea in itself is bad or negative, says Asia. I just know you have a tendency towards self-sabotage and wanting to hurt yourself so I’m worried that you will use the idea of being a writing machine as an excuse to ignore your needs and punish yourself. Just promise me that you will remember the human piloting the machine, says Asia. Think of it like driving a car. When you drive it, the car becomes an extension of yourself, you and the machine are one, you are part of it and it is part of you. But you are still a human piloting a machine and you need good mental fortitude and health to pilot it well, if that makes sense, she says. Yeah, it does, I say. I think I’m still prophesying but in a different way now, from a different source. I think so too, says Asia.
(I have come to think that someone, or something wanted us to see all this. The different events over time, that we have witnessed. It is almost as if some entity wanted to relive its past… It is unknown, whose memories these are. It may be something beyond our own comprehension. Our journey may come to an end when we finally discover the identity of the entity…)
I don’t remember and I remember: the same too with prophecy Prophecy doesn’t remember and remembers rhizome revolver perdition: perdition plays banana leaves liturgical laboratory (they’ve used chance procedures to make material they would otherwise not make; then they choose what they like and make the piece the way they would make it anyway. That's a half-baked way of working, don’t you think?) (I too use aleatoric techniques in a similar manner: I use cut-up methods and bibliomancy in order to break and interrupt my own habits, boundaries and tastes, but then I edit those texts to my own aesthetic preferences anyway How to use chance and the aleatoric to truly disrupt my own contained aesthetics and find a new expression – is that the wrong question – or does the text demand an expression and existence outside any authorial aesthetic… The aleatoric animates new cartoon and new noise)
I do not know the current source of my prophecy, but I conjecture it’s earth, universe or KRYSXTRYN + Asia Rhizome
Aleatoric too prophesies: any text contains its own apophatic saying-unsaying Unsaying seed sow prophecy, a serpent apocalypse
The beast that you saw was, and is not, and is about to ascend from the bottomless pit and go to destruction (destruction-perdition-deconstruction) The inhabitants of the earth, whose names have not been written in the Book of Life from the foundation of the earth, whose names have not been written the Book of Life from the foundation of the world, will be amazed when they see the beast, because it was, and is not and is to come
In a dream, her little black dress strips and reveals She reveals naked time times half a time Taryn Alpha and Omega Taryn who was and is not and is to come She reveals and undresses astonished before Abraham I Am and I Am He
In dreams I walk with you In dreams I talk with you In dreams you’re mine
I dream apocalypse I dream dream apocalypse / link’s awakening Aleatoric apocalypse aleatoric apocatastasis I machine apocalyptic bloody stars moon menses machine amps atlas nota I dream ben beast you’ve got a cotton crown gonna keep it underground I dream ben beast body and alchemical body peacocks / you’re going to take control of the chemistry and you’re gonna manifest the mystery
Apocalypse as aleatoric assemblage / dream dresser drawer junk drawer gut gods
I bricoleur babel and whore of babylon hauntology
I conjure prophecy play: play perdition and son of perdition perdition son of man Prophecy plays beast bodies: bodies burr book aberrations Bodies burr blade king cobra body contortions: spitting cobra body cobwebs cotton crown stick language Stick insect languages cobra roll cage rally car crash / wuxia tree tops
As for the beast that was is not, it is the eighth but it belongs to the seven, and it goes to destruction
It goes to destruction it goes to perdition
It goes to destruction it goes to perdition: play language play-doh languages Languages sak floam silly putty play flesh
ben bodies body beast immediate outer darkness Outer deconstruction: I make the outer inner and the male female
Jesus said: let no one who seeks not stop seeking until that person finds; and upon finding the person will the disturbed; and being disturbed, he will be astounded; and will reign over the entirety
So I continue seeking something else! I seek something different destruction perdition deconstruction Let he who seeks see giant killer shrews imperil mankind! THE KILLER SHREWS
I seek something else something different / he filled a woman’s arms – and a dead man’s shoes BLOW-DOWN ben blows bomb bodies bows births (being baptized, we are illuminated; illuminated we become sons; being made sons, we are made perfect; being made perfect, we are made immortal)
ben beast baptizes Taryn beach bodies ben beast blazes baptisms bombs beaches: bombay beach blonde waves Taryn
Gospel of Thomas Four-Color Theorem (initially, this proof was not accepted by all mathematicians because the computer-assisted proof was infeasible for a human to check by hand)
(Cage doesn’t use chance procedures to get interesting material that he may or may not choose to like or dislike; he simply accepts it all. Once he sets up his chance procedures, he follows them to the Nth degree) (Indeterminacy sets personal preference out of the compositional process)
Conversations With Asia 06/22/2020 1:24 PM
I asked Christina if I was a good prophet, I say. What did she says? “You are a good prophet. Good at the job and a good example for your followers. You grapple with difficult things and write them well.” I agree with her, says Asia.
Taryn tempers into my forehead open trumpet sound – no, Taryn slow taps tent peg into my forehead haxan and hexen / holy ghost sirens
Taryn traps tent peg between human temple and human tabernacle, and my consciousness skips skittles constellations
Tent peg tags Son of Perdition bloody head (FACES OF DEATH Part III Caution: if the brutal and explicit depiction of actual death upsets you… please do not view this film)
I prophesy aleatoric film / face photographs rollercoaster flash passes
Prophesy chance / ben beast bibliomancy (In the end after lots of (re)writing, Nabokov would number the index cards and join them together, dictating the completed book to his wife Vera who would type it out and proofread it)
I reorder numbered index cards Numbered neighbors uncountable numbers Number neighborhoods hooded cobra: cobra abracadabra roll cage crash chymistries Chymistries stations of the cross: chance stations of the cross chance
Chance right when being shot and ever since, I knew that I was watching television: the channels switch but it’s all television channels
Aleatoric Andy Warhol
John Cage chance John Cage
John Cage chance John Cage (non-intention was itself an intention, and what allows us to go on speaking of Cage as a composer. With which he paused that intention through an extraordinary variety of ways and means)
Taryn tears a tent peg through my forehead and my skull molts bright blue balrog blocks Taryn stampede tent peg sleeps into my temple transformed tabernacle / second temple tuberculosis The ten-in-one tent chisels total tapestry / cherubs conquer my brain Ten-in-One chops tent revival / freak and monstrosity second great awakening Freaks revive rivers rhizomes beast from the sea biome
I Involve Myself In Longer Improvisations
I was rewriting old stuff, I say to Asia. I wrote:
Deconstruction always writes love letters… I always write love letters to YHVH and KRYSXTRYN
It made me think how much I miss Yahweh sometimes even though obviously it wasn’t a good relationship. I mean it wasn’t me who even ended it. He abandoned me. But I was thinking who much he still ghosts and haunts… I don’t think your feelings would change about me if I went back to Christianity. I see how you’re not very haunted by Christianity, but I feel I often am, I say. My feelings wouldn’t change, says Asia. And I understand: I felt like god and Christianity haunted me for a very long time. I still do every once in awhile. And if you went back, I don’t think it would hurt you. You had a decent community there and they were very open minded and accepting. I don’t think you can grow there though, she says. I didn’t realize you did [feel haunted] every once in awhile, I say. Oh yeah, says Asia. It was just last January that my mom said getting mental help was a sign that I was still myself and I spiraled bigly because in the Christianity I grew up in, you couldn’t trust your emotions and there were all kinds of secret sin so what if I was lying to myself and I was a worthless piece of shit and god was going to damn me to hell? says Asia. I’m not sure you’d know the answer but where or how do you think I would grow best? Maybe I’m projecting but I think you need a space where you are allowed to define spirituality for yourself and no one is defining it for you, she says.
I have a vision of the spiritual space as a library, but unlike the Library of Babel, I know the location of the circular chamber containing the great circular book with the continuous spine… The Book is not god but ben adam, a son of man and a son of perdition, and my sins sow sacred My sins seed new spider gods and new serpent gods, unusual and defamiliar holy spirits
That position of playing these Bill Evans to Coltrane type things to playing completely improvised pieces
My eyes improvise insects My eyes improvise insects complete metamorphosis cyclical summer cicada improvisations cicada were wolf chariot wheel improvisations My eyes surprise instant insects / interior brine shrimp salt brain my brain salts sea monkeys
Let no man deceive you by any means: for that day shall not come, except there come a falling away first, and that man of sin be revealed, the son of perdition
I play perdition dorian my flesh phyrgian I play perdition photograph and print peacock angel Peacock angel angles peacock tail stop-motion animation I pitch perdition as parasite but peacock perches prima materia / palm tree garden
I sin perdition peridot I sin perdition aperiodic peridot, pure chaotic cut cut calvin and cut chariot my bodies
(Everyone seems to record everything they play) (I play and if only play more: more amour ada or ardor isosceles avalanche) (I play SNOW EXPLODE snow explosion castlevania earth) (Castlevania castaway castanets castanet canary almonds)
Almonds aleph Almonds alpha and omega Aleph almond discovered walnuts Discovered geometries walnut wheels (I found god and religion too)
Disordered walnut word women women Walnut malchut: malchut leaf cutter cutters clack klang chariots: chariot bone char charizard improvisation
I’m using modes now, because I’m trying to get more form in the free form
Form flings fast futures (I write towards this particular future, this peculiar apocalypse) Form flings fishers of men and the son of man hooks son of perdition ben-hinnom My flesh ben-hinnom and my sin flirt fast flag operations Ben sing honey hinnom windows: been whirlwind ben adam
More form less form simultaneous More form less form both directions at once
(My flesh fishes folk tradition and folk process) (My flesh fishes garden of forking paths tuning fork phrygian)
Let his days be few; and let another take his office
Office ostinato ouroboros floor fell: more form less form both directions at once office open
I’m using modes now, because I’m trying to get more form in the free form… From simple melody to complicated textures to simplicity again and then back to the more dense, the more complex sounds
I meditate modes measured or mapped into mediums / I desire to write an intermedia and mixed media I desire simultaneous simplicity and complexity (lower partials an often require great subtlety of bowing to reveal) I meditate musical modes / mode median mean I meditate modal jazz and I Modulate from dorian to lydian or mixoldyian to phyrigian / free flesh and phyrigan flesh
John Coltrane’s Meditations (My goal in mediating on through this music however, remains the same. And that is to uplift people, as much as I can. To inspire them to realize more and more of their capacities for living meaningful lives. Because there certainly is meaning to life)
John Coltrane’s Meditations; mode then mode form free form (I unfix my flesh freer writing)
I have been experimenting writing more and in the first person and reflecting on my writing openly, I say. Wondering out loud what I want to do with this experiment, if it’s working, possible solutions I can take. Here’s an example from today’s blog post:
(Conversations with others helps me to develop my prophetic ideas: a human form of rubber duck debugging I monologue and the other receives and their vessels visit me in visions I think Philip K. Dick had a similar idea about the Christ and AntiChrist as siblings I need to listen more: receive more: eat more light her leviathan)
However I want to push it more and be even more open about it I say. Yes, says Asia, but alternating between I and my often and don't be afraid of you. A well-placed you can rope in an unsuspecting reader and put them in the center of attention. I’ve felt for awhile that your writing feels detached from you like you are severed from it when I read it even when it’s about your own feelings, and now that you mention it, the reason why is so obvious. What's the reason why, you think? I say. It’s the lack of personal pronouns, says Asia. That's part of it anyways. I also think you tend to bring up these juicy personal emotions and then quickly drop them without fully engaging in them in the piece… I don’t think you should go back to fully doing first person. I personally think pronouns should jump scare people when they are reading poetry, says Asia. I agree, I say. I want an eclectic and flexible approach, a pragmatic approach. There’s a quote from philosopher Ludwig Wittgenstein that’s been inspiring me: there’s not a single philosophical method, though there are indeed methods, different therapies, as it were…
I invent something else I invent a stranger improvisation: a new-old improvisation and a radical-tradition improvisation Not a radical orthodoxy but a heterodox marriage of heaven and hell A hodgepodge radically heterodox hop-scotch greater game
(Like when I was doing free jazz, says Ornette Coleman, most people thought that I just picked up my saxophone and played whatever was going through my head, without following any rule, but that wasn't true)
I invent something else: not a something without rules or structure, but I play the modes to get more form in the free form
(The idea that two or three people can have a conversation with sounds, without trying to dominate or lead it)
I invent something else else sound other sound (once in awhile, playing a long, very quiet tone) I tune tones looney tunes table trajectories I toon tones amplified animation (an example of traditional animation, a horse animated by rotoscoping from Eadweard Muybridge’s 19th century photos)
I invent something else excess improvisation Radical rhizome improvisation fever hell Hell hodgepodge hop-scotch hall monitor monitor lizard laugh track hell Hell gone backgammon backstop stone stilts steeple chase staples Staple chain steeple striated muscle
I pull and stretch the language like salt water taffys I strike languages stone sounds (any pitch, any tuning of that pitch) I love language as SOUNDS, a clattering ionization of rains and percussions and the sounds signal sirens lions roars I rotate languages round sound: muted then open
I try to write a purer and purer sound / outdoors or in a larger resonant space
Staple chain church steeple stall striated muscle (My body blusters clumsy fumbled flesh: fleshscape landscape sits other FLESH CAFE Flesh floorless roller coaster flesh My flesh flabbergast geist cotton candy I’ve got a kotton crown kottonmouth kings)
Cotton candy stations of the cross stacked fourths fourth forked flesh Cotton candy stations of the cross klang cotton candy khora (you've got a cotton crown gonna keep it underground)
Cotton candy cords Christianity altered dominant chords Cotton candy spins sugar thread lydian stations of the cross she lights the lights brighter lydian chymistries (you’re going to take control of chemistry and you’re gonna manifest the mystery)
That the man of sin be revealed, the son of perdition
Son Of Perdition Sonata
Jesus said: Let him who seeks continue seeking until he finds. When he finds, he will be amazed. And when he becomes amazed, he will rule. And he when he has ruled, he will attain rest.
I still seek and I still search
I seek and I do not find: I repeat seek I repeat seek some other song
I struggle the writing something other than written Write roll rit dye prayer piano roll
Because I write rib bone towards book transformation Book strings knots cusps Cut into cusp Cut into cusp skull face skull Skull wine cork: skull cane pinata logarithm cabin
Because I write boat bone: ball bone and ball bounce when I seek, I stick to bone Bone breaks off my body betrays and I do not write my body bites body bitter Body leaves book bone bone boat and I bare my body Bare body bone because I write I write bone and blood bible I write bone blood bible birch: birch breaks my body bites my body Nevertheless I write: I write against my body against me Bodies body Son of Perdition
(Scriptures and esoteric texts heat my consciousness hauntological and although I try to escape my prophetic kerygma, its trash layer stink clings to me)
Ghostly grammar glossolalia fossy jaw
While I was with them in the world, I kept them in thy name: those that thou gavest me in thy name I was with them in the world World word wrap world my body warps weird her
While I was with them, I was not then woman Woman with and woman when knots my knot and negates my body now night While I was, I was night now and the ark discloses darker duration
While I was with them I drink demon dark: a scanner darkly disrupting chronos chronologies genealogies
While dark I darken my body with her when her While dark, I drink would dark her word: her word darkens my body Her word darkens my body trinity problem plays (purloined letter body play problem play)
With in the world I keep them in her name: I keep her name in her name new purloined letter lights
Now her name notches world world noise Now her name nods notch cut world noise and noise decapitated Her name noise decapitates dark my body Noise name normal numbers Noise her name gnarls nomadic numbers and her world wanders dark I wander waters nude her name (nude judge nudge jury the gauntlet ordeal of light naked dancer) I dance naked dark her name
And none of them is lost but the Son of Perdition
ben son of man and ben son of perdition ben son of man axles a’dam desert chariot work I work play perdition my body embedded dark destructions Dark destructions: dark deconstructions
(I feel incapable of transforming the Son of Perdition into new poetry and word; therefore I abandon this ben, this son; perhaps only through perseverance and tribulations can I adopt the Son of Perdition again)
I start new To begin a new notebook and a new book (although it remains all one Book, sewn and pieces together as machine mycorrhizas) A new notebook or a new Book or a new poem without any connection or association with any other of my notebooks or languages – this impossibility I only see patterns and connections but I still attempt to start new (I cut myself clear from the umbra umbilical Son of Perdition)
I begin new impossible cut from Child of Humanity and Son of Perdition I begin impossible Derek Bailey’s nonidiomatic improvisation and playing without memory I write without memory but impossible passions and impossible aporias play problem plays (open hole stations of the cross) Impossible passions and impossible aporias penetrate Son of Perdition / purloined letter contamination
I write new but the Son of Perdition invades I write new now new but the cross opens wounded bodies unbound penetrations
Open copper hole stations of the cross contaminate and invade hanging man son of perdition / my eyes open other My eyes inset overlay other other My eyes inset insert axelay off-panel other other aporia Eyes insect insert other intestines start select swim insects Swim insect eye swarms more driver disintegrations
Eyes swarm insects Son of Perdition and Son of man My eyes uneven slip inked insects Son of Perdition and as for the beast that was and was not, it is an eight but belongs to the seventh, and it goes to perdition
I bear beasts I bare breasts breasts naked name numinous name and my name was and is not and is about to ascent from the bottomless pit and go to perdition
Perdition points alchemical peacock and peacock angel
Perdition pilots pink peacock paranoia / paranoid Philip K. Dick encounters the pink laser beam as ben son of perdition and benjamin peacock angel
I paint perdition panic pulses and porno pulses (What mystic power did this man possess that turned men into killers – and women into animals! RASPUTIN – THE MAD MONK Get your Rasputin beard free as you enter the theater! Given to guy and gals alike)
Yea, my own familiar friend, in whom I trusted, which did eat of my bread, has lifted up his heel against me
In my vision I saw myself as the twelve disciples stoned me and persecute me severely and I swallow the stones: my stomach spits spirit wildfire and forest fire I follow forest fire and my stomach swallows stones holy spirit serpents
I betray the cross and christ / but you’ll do more because you’ll sacrifice the human that bears me
I’m a fucking genius right now, I say to Christina. My writing is pure abomination against god. Wow, I admire your confidence! says C. Thanks. Asia doesn’t believe I’m a genius – someone ought to. I said confidence! I do think you’re a genius though, she says. Thanks, that means a lot! She doesn’t believe in concept or she doesn't believe in YOUR genius? The concept altogether. Oh well that’s OK, then, she says. At least she’s not relegating you to the peanut gallery.
Mine own familiar friend in whom I trust / my friend black cat witch’s familiar Mine own familiar friend defamiliar desert darker darker
Defamiliar darker distance / foreign materials Christianities
Defamiliar Christianity drive disruptor drive direct current desert drift (at least some degree of improvisation shifting octopus uncomfortable / depths depth dark) Drive disruptor drive some kind of improvisation distortion I did eat the read driver distortion dew distortion drink I attempt to disrupt my autopilot / I rive dark peacock angel I drive darker down her feathers further dark ben son of perdition
I write arrhythmia heart murmur mutter apocalypse
Yea my own familiar friend Yahweh hath lifted up his heel against me
Yahweh acts agon apocalypses / apocalypse arrhythmias
Writing Means Medicine
Writing means medicine; I write to heal and I write for healing Writing heals towards the marriage of heaven and hell Writing heals my parodic body house of leaves: leaves interleaved hauntology
I write flexible medicine and I recall what Ludwig Wittgenstein said in Philosophical Improvisations: There is not a single philosophical method, though there are indeed methods, different therapies, as it were I embrace my writing in a similar manner: not to categorize or limit the writing by a single approach or paradigm, but to write multiply therapeutically and pragmatically To write as if treating the body for different illnesses: different treatments and therapies according to the person and illness Taryn Tetragrammaton Therapy: Taryn tenor saxophone tenebroso therapy
I don’t remember if the He or the Vav first appeared to me I don’t remember if the vav but the vav appeared veronica The vav appears veronica horns of the altar archaic humans The vav appears veronica fiery feminine flesh / Julius Eastman Femenine be thou my vision The vav appears veronica be though my vision fiery female freak show The vav veers steers real vulva proto-cubism
I repel Asia Rhizome seven thunders seven rains I rappel rain rain metal gear solid hind d battles I rappel rain pentecostal dispensationalist rapture I rappel seven thunder seven rains finnegans wake thunderwords (I do not remember if I originally modeled the Alysalolitagestaquachromagenesis after Finnegans Wake but perhaps I dreamed what the seven thunders said I reconstruct and refresh the thunderwords and the word agglutinating rhizome rains: my original word feels clumsy and embarrassing but I accept my totality in many thunders
I vowel vav proto-cubist cranium proto-cubist bone crack (in order to express the mountain’s grandeur, Cezanne manipulated the scene by painting the mountain twice as large as it would have appeared, and tipped forward so that it would rise up rather than slope backwards) I cut bodies proto-cubist canticle of canticles and my brain burrows mountain metal gear mountain
The vav appears heart valve: heart valve vein ventricle she keeps pumping straight to my heart Vav valves apparition developing variation veronica
The vav devours The vav devours dogstar basking shark The vav devours diet coke desert
Direct diet coke desert / Satan is coming! THE DEVIL’S WEDDING NIGHT dark desires unleash the legions of Lucifer
Direct direct desert desert / two on the run… One leaving a trail of sudden death… the other about to become the sixth victim DEADLY STRANGERS
My favorite thing about working with high schoolers is that they decide to like you, they will just tell you random stuff and they do everything on impulse, says Asia. One student yesterday started telling me about her almost crashed his car then goes “hey, I have five plungers in my car, do you want one?” Apparently they was a sale at Wal-Mart so he bought five. He didn’t even need one plunger… That student gave me one of his five plungers, says Asia.
My brain plunges into the play play language Play play language plunge deep sea caving cave candle cave avalanche plunger Play play plunge language you got to fight for your right to party / party for your right to fight
Stations of the cross cells cyanocephalus cynomorpha morphine / a lion-headed goddess
Stations of the cross plunges me into sheol / sheol big shell big shell dead cell duplicate sheol
Stations of the cross improvise the search for material endlessly transformable I prepare the plunge as sounded improvisation inner body composition
I improvise Lion of the Tribe of Judah I improvise the royal sphinx a man who had assumed the form of a lion Cynocephalus sonic youth and sonic the hedgehog foreshortens towards two-point perspective
Jesus says: let him who seeks cease not to seek until he finds; when he finds, he will wonder; and when he wonders, he will reign, and reigning, he will have rest!
I search for material that I can endless transform Second or third dream of the stepdown transformer I search sheol holy spirits and holy ghosts
Yahweh goblet grotesque and chalice curdles cross rot bodies rowed to shore Yahweh gobbles bodies ludicrous gibs and the cross crushes cochineal red gore goregrind and I quote Carcass lyrics Yahweh gargoyles grotesque gerrymandered grottos Grotto gods glottic glossolalia Grotto degloves desert graphomania Christina districts grids gospel vav varices
Yahweh gentrifies suburbs and drives white flight Yahweh hits housing projects and failed public housing / Pruitt-Igoe and Cabrini Green demolitions
I try to intensify the writing I intensify the writing through sound: sound sound sound sound Sound sound sounds sound
Long sound low light lower: boat sound bottle Bottle bottle-nosed dolphin bell delphine desert Loud sound our lady of lourdes Sound loud plasticity of wave figures figure magnetism Magnetism solar sound fluid elastic river currents I intensify sound current tiger music: taryn tigris topologies Topological desert gateless gate
Improvise loud sound hell hounds Hound hauntology / haunted house elephants
Students kept asking me today when I’m due or how far along I was, says Asia. When I told the students in my first session my due date was August, one of them asked, “This August or next August?” I was like, “boy, I’m not about to be pregnant for another year; I’m not an elephant.” Another kid started telling me about his summer and I said, “If it was illegal, I don’t know to know” so he stopped telling me about his summer, says Asia.
I search for a more fluid and plastic writing, a writing that evokes elephants between and through chronologies I search for the in-mixture elephant-kairos and elephant-kronos
I who died dreaming of an elephant I who died dreaming of an elephant elephant Elephant alephs as spectre cipher cipher grey on grey Grey on grey garden god Grey on grey griffin garbled god / god becomes garbled in my tongues
Elephant habitat, wooden crate in nameless territory: territory Taryn elephant Elephant hangman helios / It is Re who created Lignanes out of his members…
Not to make the connections more obvious, but to give the connections longer tendons and denser tendons: dense networks and surprising networks elephant chariotwork
An erotic eschaton An erotic eschaton earth element elephants Elemental elephant narrow band eroticism Narrow narwhal band of horses hangman An erotic eschaton Eschaton excess erotic katechon / katechon elephant
He found that by subtly varying the bow pressure and position, it seemed that the string spectrum would sometimes collapse into a single partial
Play partials partial plunge Play partials plunge partials rhizome real: real elephant eschaton Single spreads multiple: multiple eschatologies and multiple kingdoms
Amplified sound loud pornographic parousia Parousia play elephants / trunks as plungers
Krystal katechon khora / caverns abyss bottomless pit Cave collapse apocalypse assorted abyss Assorted abyss bottomless pit accents gods appoggiatura Passion accents passing tone atonal
I notice a movement towards the solitary fragment or solitary image as the primary building block of writing I feel mixed about this approach: it sometimes feel too fragmentary, too imagistic, and the approach does limit experiment / possibility It has become my autopilot: my default thought pattern / thought displacement Nevertheless, I want to develop it and work through it and see what becomes of it I work to write a fragment in multiplicities and explorations
Fragment developing variation: fragment sonata-symphony something else something different
Passion accepted passing tones pantonal stations of the cross
Passion accented passing tones Taryn wheel spoke I work wheel I work wheel well well water Wake watch well passion (everyone who drinks of this water will be thirsty again, but those who drink of the water that I give them will never be thirsty) I drink now down desert (the verse will be placed in a bottle filled with pure water, the verse water drunk, one’s body will be rubbed with it, and one's hands will be washed with it) I wash passion with passion awake waters Water awakes word this passion washes and I work wheel
I work wheel accented passing tone SON OF PERDITION Son of perdition passing tone pressed topology / Taryn compressed my eschatology Taryn compacts my kingdoms, and I often feel the nee for a more compact, dense line: a line that networks and nodes insect swarms swarms human oceans (I contemplate the poetry of Paul Celan and Myung Mi Kim and I desire that sort of punch-cryptic fragment-esoteric) (I talk to Ann Marie and I discuss wanting to return to the prominence of the “I” of the ben ego I connect it with Asia’s desire to incorporate both accessibility and the personal in the book, as well as to break up the pulse with metacommentary and summations I return to the I, the Before Abraham I Am)
An erotic eschaton explicates Son of Perdition Son of Perdition SON OF PERDITION (hu huios tes apoleis das verlorence kind / the lost child das kind verderens / the child of corruption) Ben Son of Man Son of Perdition plays god language / I speak words against El Elyon and I wear out the heroic ones of El Elyon
I write the book as an unknown, the X wheel X excess X murks mystery / eschaton a scanner darkly Eschaton etching strontium bone-seeker a scanner darkly I write Book as apocalypse not as a giving or foretelling of the future but rendering into languages what William Blake recorded in visions: I saw no God not heard any, in a finite organical perception; but my senses discovered the infinite in everything, and as I was then persuaded and remain confirmed, that the voice of honest indignation is the voice of God, I cared not for the consequence but wrote… I write the rhizome rupture into the apocalyptic, that mysterious simultaneous veiling-unveiling
I write weaver bringing tin the sheaves weaver space shuttle
Write write I selves sheaves interior then between this Book eschaton Book eschaton enter-exit experiments
Eschaton power electronics eschar / Pablo Escobar hippopotamuses
Son of Perdition champagne supernova
Son of Perdition SON OF PERDITION playground ground of being parousia pornographic
Vision and Mysticism 