Dear Scarab, my father, I honor you, blessed be your work – in eternity – amen The desert seems to absolutely demand prayers
Amen, vision devours benjamin a ravenous wolf Vision devours Visions of Amen and Amen I tell you, vision surrounds you vision Vision as developing variations devours its prey in the evening and I shared out spoils
I inhale vapor vision various beetles / scarab of morning Morning scarab scrambles mirror light sandpaper / vision videotape trasks abrasives worn bone brain
Visions vibrate violent divine invasion and my brain boils new gods
Vision bows abrupt and I bank abrupt fire difficult vision and divided vision: nevertheless, I experience vision and I experiment vision I experiment abrupt vision and vision amen dislocates deserts but the divine invasion spills irrational blood splatter splatter stone ben hinnom
In visions my face appears a devil’s face My face peels away in dark blue fires and reveals a demon’s face My face fuck bash boombox skull black box / the nonfunctional jukebox shouts sexually aggressive ballads and burlesques Ben body burlesque beats outside my body crucifies figure and deity I experience or experiment an Isaiah throne throat vision and seraphs scrape chalk palimpsest holy holy holy Serpents sharpen salmon fire holy holy holy hallucination cosmic aether I vigilante angels practice hamon line alchemy I modify my body heavy metal alchemy / flesh faun fall songs from folklore Folklore spikes my body lawn spikes oh susanna she lights the lights Folklore spikes my brain spikenard times square neon Time square square wave neon / metropolis angels evangelize xenon eva amen I tell you
In Divine Invasion this same dialectic reappears and this time is stated to be the two sides of God (rather than world order; that is, in Divine Invasion, it is now correctly seen to be within God himself!)
Vision invades and devours ben-hinnom ben body vapor Vision invades vapor hevel boll weevil word
Vision evades and then invades and I’m the very dream I witness the same dialectic: god god ghost ghosts shore midnight Reach midnight shore birds ben dream gods as gods / desert water dialectic
Vision evades invades brain varnish / violent brush turpentine vision virus
Vision invades and repeats: lift your eyes on high and see See divine language and divine dream and I dream ben-hinnom bodyless god (It is now between Emmanuel who is terrible, destroying, solar heat warring side, writes PKD, and Zina who is loving, playful, tender, associated with bells and flowers; and what unifies the two at last is play)
What unifies Ben and Asia Rhizome: Play What unifies the Book, Ben, and Asia: Play X Play The X plays prays aporia mystery / a passion for the impossible
(I remember guys would look at Monk’s music and say, we can’t play this, but by the end of the rehearsal everybody was playing it anyways, says Sonny Rollins)
What unifies the two at last (by the way, it is SHE who takes the lead in restoring memory and enacting unification; Emmanuel is the side that has forgotten and is impaired; she has not and is not impaired) – is play. She plays and Emmanuel has the secret desire to play… Asia takes the lead in restoring my memory and she unifies our friendship in creativity She plays and creates from the insect absurd, and I participate in her play and mystery I remember our fiery searcher past lives and our beetle burrows and bearings
And I had forgotten how to read music I could no longer play, I could now play by instinct Then at one point I did not need to translates the notes; they went directly to my hands
I could no longer play but I trust my hand in visions
I should get an eye tattoo on the back of my neck, says Asia. Why an eye? Like to ward off evil? Surprise bomb, she says. Because it would look cool as fuck. What kind of eye you thinking? Just a cool looking eye. I’ll ask a tattoo artist to draw it… Did I tell you about the time I carved Napoleon Bonaparte’s face into a banana during art class? she says. No you didn’t! We were supposed to carve a portrait into a piece of black scratch paper, like the kind you scratch at and it’s gold underneath. I was going to do a portrait of Napoleon Bonaparte on the scratch paper… But I also had a banana and a scratch tool so I spent the whole class carving his face into a banana. At the end my friend took the banana to show the teacher and I was embarrassed because it was proof that I slacked off all class period. He loved it though, she says.
Eye extends emergency vision and ambulance invasion eye excess shakes holy spirit vision / divine invasion express
In visions, I expect angels Angels eye play eros embed topos / angels surround play
From angel series From angel series serial angels From angel series serial dodecaphonic desert from a series on angels From a series on angels annulus on being an angel On being an angel number one space squared I eye space space eye dropper desert distal bone angel Space eye search sheets of sound immediate space improvisation (I improvise space angels automatic machine gun writing)
On being an angel number one house number three house number four
Angel four fork flesh house number four Angel number three Taryn tans leather chromium / chromium chromatic vegetables
I had been avoiding geometry: I had been avoid ruled lines
I seclude angels attic arctic polar bear blues I seclude or select additive identity angels / Yahweh of Armies An angel adjacent jar jax angel an and An angel at acid angel acid bath bit blue An angel acid at blue butterflies (I met an angel with a sawed off shot gun wanted by the FBI He dropped some acid, killed his parents, then he hit the road)
Ativan angels ark anxious animations Angel graph grab god gut amputate angels Angel gar gat glint granite night angel hexes I hex nyx hip now night angels fly dailight savings time
Assorted angels assess asset scorpions Scorpions scald scalene triangle anthills Anthill harsh noise noise wall woman awake wall wall clock body Body dye rye rhizome body angel apartment angels Body dip depth desk raven ray body: radar buzzard vision Angel vertical canvas discharge be beat rain rattle repulsion Disk desk distance driver angel ampule amplifier Angel asia arson arsenic solar anus psychosis Art angel camera eye embolism / schism angels
Anarchic art amino acid angels
Angel angel alien allan armor ardour compact axe angels Angel angel asia among rivers return of the living dead rabbit resurrections Asia among rivers wrench wrath rood red red run angels Run magus mourning diary (Who knows? Maybe something valuable in these notes?) Maybe something valuable in these notes These notes notate nacht nothing cafeteria tray teets I confess night I confess night night now (I spend most every night beneath the light of a neon moon) I confess night flesh flesh right dark now angels Angel angel arch neon dark the assembly and assemblage of angels
What unifies the two at last: Play What unifies Ben and Asia: Play
Tag: krysxtryn
Sin Simplicity
Sin simplicity Sin saturn simplicity / antinomian angels Sin sustains sin dominant seventh chords Sin suspends suspends sin seconds and fourths Fourth fugitive flesh flesh fugue Surplus sin we sing sin we thin gin
To surprise myself with sin: this sin does not surprise me My sin surprises not but I sin violent passions chatter the swap scene MARRIAGE FOR FOUR
I love the line holy spirit urban sprawl, says Asia. I like this one too: “I obscure my boundary between a sound and noise my noise…” Was not prepared to be jump scared by the line “Yahweh’s hidden glory hole”. What brilliant word play, she says. I was thinking about your use of “jump scares” in writing, I say. I find the idea inspiring. I’m trying to find ways to write write on autopilot and jump scare myself. If you think about it, says Asia, a big part of writing is playing with the reader’s preconceived expectations whether intentionally or unintentionally. Jump scares just make sense, she says.
I often write too much on autopilot: too much trance and prophecy I want more intentional vision: I want to conjure consistent vision that disrupts my brain with violent dreaming and violent vision transformations
Jump scare sin, a saturnine nuisance nuisance sabbatai sevi Sin jump scares sabbatean sea dirac sea This sea slides slow sin match strikes I match strike sin tension sea I slurp sea human language urban legends / legend trip tetragrammaton Slow sea sing he was the sin king for every passion hungry – TIJUANA TRAMP
Slower sin dirac sea: slower sea dirac sea Dirac cataracts noisy desert abyss I sow abyss sin and I sin abyss now noise now noise experiments I experiment transforming my excrement into gold I experiment a sabbatean and sethian alchemy: a newly invented alchemy ark noise aardvark noise
Night noise nightly noise Night noise napalm / fire nettles napalm apples Night noise normal numbers / I know numbers desert nude door Desert nude door desert noose door Noise newt amphibious numbers androgynous numbers Numbered noise slow sin novas Novella noise slow sin swim Slow sin swarm
The beast that you saw was, and is not, and is about to ascend from the bottomless pit and go to perdition
I apply perdition as a heating pad
I open perdition pure soap bottomless pit and my body showers magma / moth meteorites
Perdition peeks pinprick pinhole mountain peaks
Perdition absurdly pink perdition
Ben beast body beast jars bodies black bear Black bear bottomless pit grizzly gods
Ben beast breasts blossom nude: absolute nude bottomless pit
Bottomless pit pauses pink: pink parrot perdition
Ben sons of perdition pursue strange flesh
I see the beast verb word surprise violence retrograde virus sin RNA world world sin I still sin silkworms boiled alive in their cocoons / premature christian coffins
Sin strips my skin nude skull / skull seeps zerg creep hive hell
I don’t know if you could tell but I think you would consider me a prolific writer, wouldn’t you say? I say to Asia. My process has become very efficient. How I write and the meticulous nature of coping and editing from notebook to notebook and assembling it all together and then typing and editing it… It’s so efficient I often don’t remember a lot of what I write sometimes. Like those lines you love, I would have to look back and see the context. I understand they are lines I wrote because they are ben sounding lines but sometimes the process is a blur because I produce so much. Now that can be a positive. Perhaps I have mastered the flow / trance / mystical state of writing. But I think some people would see it as a negative. Like being a machine. I don’t think being a machine is negative either though, I say. I don’t think the idea in itself is bad or negative, says Asia. I just know you have a tendency towards self-sabotage and wanting to hurt yourself so I’m worried that you will use the idea of being a writing machine as an excuse to ignore your needs and punish yourself. Just promise me that you will remember the human piloting the machine, says Asia. Think of it like driving a car. When you drive it, the car becomes an extension of yourself, you and the machine are one, you are part of it and it is part of you. But you are still a human piloting a machine and you need good mental fortitude and health to pilot it well, if that makes sense, she says. Yeah, it does, I say. I think I’m still prophesying but in a different way now, from a different source. I think so too, says Asia.
(I have come to think that someone, or something wanted us to see all this. The different events over time, that we have witnessed. It is almost as if some entity wanted to relive its past… It is unknown, whose memories these are. It may be something beyond our own comprehension. Our journey may come to an end when we finally discover the identity of the entity…)
I don’t remember and I remember: the same too with prophecy Prophecy doesn’t remember and remembers rhizome revolver perdition: perdition plays banana leaves liturgical laboratory (they’ve used chance procedures to make material they would otherwise not make; then they choose what they like and make the piece the way they would make it anyway. That's a half-baked way of working, don’t you think?) (I too use aleatoric techniques in a similar manner: I use cut-up methods and bibliomancy in order to break and interrupt my own habits, boundaries and tastes, but then I edit those texts to my own aesthetic preferences anyway How to use chance and the aleatoric to truly disrupt my own contained aesthetics and find a new expression – is that the wrong question – or does the text demand an expression and existence outside any authorial aesthetic… The aleatoric animates new cartoon and new noise)
I do not know the current source of my prophecy, but I conjecture it’s earth, universe or KRYSXTRYN + Asia Rhizome
Aleatoric too prophesies: any text contains its own apophatic saying-unsaying Unsaying seed sow prophecy, a serpent apocalypse
The beast that you saw was, and is not, and is about to ascend from the bottomless pit and go to destruction (destruction-perdition-deconstruction) The inhabitants of the earth, whose names have not been written in the Book of Life from the foundation of the earth, whose names have not been written the Book of Life from the foundation of the world, will be amazed when they see the beast, because it was, and is not and is to come
In a dream, her little black dress strips and reveals She reveals naked time times half a time Taryn Alpha and Omega Taryn who was and is not and is to come She reveals and undresses astonished before Abraham I Am and I Am He
In dreams I walk with you In dreams I talk with you In dreams you’re mine
I dream apocalypse I dream dream apocalypse / link’s awakening Aleatoric apocalypse aleatoric apocatastasis I machine apocalyptic bloody stars moon menses machine amps atlas nota I dream ben beast you’ve got a cotton crown gonna keep it underground I dream ben beast body and alchemical body peacocks / you’re going to take control of the chemistry and you’re gonna manifest the mystery
Apocalypse as aleatoric assemblage / dream dresser drawer junk drawer gut gods
I bricoleur babel and whore of babylon hauntology
I conjure prophecy play: play perdition and son of perdition perdition son of man Prophecy plays beast bodies: bodies burr book aberrations Bodies burr blade king cobra body contortions: spitting cobra body cobwebs cotton crown stick language Stick insect languages cobra roll cage rally car crash / wuxia tree tops
As for the beast that was is not, it is the eighth but it belongs to the seven, and it goes to destruction
It goes to destruction it goes to perdition
It goes to destruction it goes to perdition: play language play-doh languages Languages sak floam silly putty play flesh
ben bodies body beast immediate outer darkness Outer deconstruction: I make the outer inner and the male female
Jesus said: let no one who seeks not stop seeking until that person finds; and upon finding the person will the disturbed; and being disturbed, he will be astounded; and will reign over the entirety
So I continue seeking something else! I seek something different destruction perdition deconstruction Let he who seeks see giant killer shrews imperil mankind! THE KILLER SHREWS
I seek something else something different / he filled a woman’s arms – and a dead man’s shoes BLOW-DOWN ben blows bomb bodies bows births (being baptized, we are illuminated; illuminated we become sons; being made sons, we are made perfect; being made perfect, we are made immortal)
ben beast baptizes Taryn beach bodies ben beast blazes baptisms bombs beaches: bombay beach blonde waves Taryn
Gospel of Thomas Four-Color Theorem (initially, this proof was not accepted by all mathematicians because the computer-assisted proof was infeasible for a human to check by hand)
(Cage doesn’t use chance procedures to get interesting material that he may or may not choose to like or dislike; he simply accepts it all. Once he sets up his chance procedures, he follows them to the Nth degree) (Indeterminacy sets personal preference out of the compositional process)
Conversations With Asia 06/22/2020 1:24 PM
I asked Christina if I was a good prophet, I say. What did she says? “You are a good prophet. Good at the job and a good example for your followers. You grapple with difficult things and write them well.” I agree with her, says Asia.
Taryn tempers into my forehead open trumpet sound – no, Taryn slow taps tent peg into my forehead haxan and hexen / holy ghost sirens
Taryn traps tent peg between human temple and human tabernacle, and my consciousness skips skittles constellations
Tent peg tags Son of Perdition bloody head (FACES OF DEATH Part III Caution: if the brutal and explicit depiction of actual death upsets you… please do not view this film)
I prophesy aleatoric film / face photographs rollercoaster flash passes
Prophesy chance / ben beast bibliomancy (In the end after lots of (re)writing, Nabokov would number the index cards and join them together, dictating the completed book to his wife Vera who would type it out and proofread it)
I reorder numbered index cards Numbered neighbors uncountable numbers Number neighborhoods hooded cobra: cobra abracadabra roll cage crash chymistries Chymistries stations of the cross: chance stations of the cross chance
Chance right when being shot and ever since, I knew that I was watching television: the channels switch but it’s all television channels
Aleatoric Andy Warhol
John Cage chance John Cage
John Cage chance John Cage (non-intention was itself an intention, and what allows us to go on speaking of Cage as a composer. With which he paused that intention through an extraordinary variety of ways and means)
Taryn tears a tent peg through my forehead and my skull molts bright blue balrog blocks Taryn stampede tent peg sleeps into my temple transformed tabernacle / second temple tuberculosis The ten-in-one tent chisels total tapestry / cherubs conquer my brain Ten-in-One chops tent revival / freak and monstrosity second great awakening Freaks revive rivers rhizomes beast from the sea biome
I Stain Canvas Black Khora Without Gods
I do not pray I no longer pray and Yahweh ceases to listen The spirit of prophecy left me weeks ago months ago years ago god gone gone long my body desertification Immediate abandon immediate abaddon Bottomless pit continuum alphabet I always feel like a false prophet Yahweh stones me rocks bounce of my body blood stones block chord stones Stones tone clusters grape cluster constellations Headlines, slogans, groups of sounds and letters Writing fuck cluster mandible claw An object both seen and used: an object containing thought but wade concrete through play-activity I lack play I lack play pink beam neighborhood ball / ativan arcade Ativan arcade arcade atrium archives Archive carves improvisation PLAY-ACTIVITY PLAY-ACTIVITY (denkgegenstanddenspiel) Denkgegenstanddenkspiel (THINKING OBJECT PUZZLE GAME) I lack play I lack absurdity I lack humor I strike myself down with the sword and sword swing start and select buttons / button sour boxer box cutters
Play brevity and conciseness Play the languages and game-rules rabbit my flesh invents new formulation My flesh fucks with the formula My flesh fucks flesh beef chuck my fat grinds god signal saturates / saturated stomach slit sonnet Striated stomach slit stomach sources Stretched time stretched stomach sonic youth suicides and sonic the hedgehog death
(The television screen had become the retina of the wind’s eye)
My television eye transmit an exact replica of my eye My television eye emits WE ARE CONTROLLING TRANSMISSION my television eye assorted insects Insects eat my eyes TV dinner tray trucklift icepick Insects icepick eye an uneven energy the globular eye stained glass dreamcatcher insects
My television eye sucked like a breast My television eye drinking my left eye between her lips An erotic television eye vortex An erotic television eye vertigo swarms insect eyes
My eyes endlessly exchange meanings and images the utility of desiring-machines Emergent eye emergent total eye: the endless exchange of eyes Eyes endlessly exchange eyes and I refuse to appear on television except on television Eyes endlessly exchange eyes immediate space and desert Eyes exchange immediate space and immediate desert
I feel desolate radically desolate I feel empty radically empty my body hollow My body hollow earth I hollow my body empty horror my skull full of crickets My cricket skull empty interior theater Inside interior theater IMMEDIATELY space and IMMEDIATE desert I feel desolate and I break eggs in a bathtub I break my body eggs in a bathtub tank burst shells / I sometimes leap buildings in a single bound I swallow ten peel eggs and I cut up peeled eyes My eyes insert inserts other earth My empty eye empties something other my body other alien desolate My body anything other than desolate the desert Desert desolate diagonals the eye intimidates The eye intimidates then intermediates intermediate / median maudlin the well whale songs
I realize this complete abandonment by Yahweh – Yahweh abandons me utterly completely – coffins complete Complete abandonment abbadon and the archangel of abyss smokes my body (benjamin hacked up for a barbecue and benjamin hung on a meathook) The archangel blurs my body herd my body again abyss / abyss agon my body gone from god generous gore This abandonment by Yahweh acids total absolute: this not a mere dark night of the soul but total permanent dark Not spiritual dryness but spiritual desert Yahweh abandons me absolute but I aim endless arrow archegrammar I aim endless arrow rhizome arche-writing and I write Signs Gospel I write Signs Gospel writing not a sign of a sign except all signs the serous signature of my body My body fire signature and my flesh traces the letters My entrails trace letters the icon intestines / stations of the cross chainsaw disembodiment
The king over them an angel of the abyss whose Hebrew name ABADDON Greek name APOLLYON Latin name EXTERMINANS The king, the angel of the bottomless pit – my body continually pits rusts rots residue (the trace of the trace and the residue of the residue restless writing and restless gospel
Restless desert and restless abandonment
Complete Eloi Eloi Eli Sabacthani / my god my god, my lord, why have you forsaken me? He spoke these words on the cross, for he had left the place
I abandon the god that abandons me I abandon the god that abandons me / Sheol naked before him Abaddon has no cover I excommunicate the Christianity that excommunicates me / Abaddon and death say we only have a report of it I spit out the Christ who spits me out / a fire burning down to Abaddon I abandon the Yahweh that the Yahweh that abandons me / Sheol and Abbadon cannot be satisfied, nor the eyes of man be satisfied
Now the Spirit of Yahweh had turned away form Saul, and an evil Spirit from Yahweh tormented him / God put an evil spirit between Abimelech and the lords of Shechem, and the lords of Shechem broke faith with the house of Abimelech An evil spirit from Yahweh and a mischief-making spirit from Yahweh causes discord in my brain (I felt a funeral, in my brain, and mourners to and fro)
And if he left off dreaming of you… And if he left off dreaming of you where do you suppose you’d be? … You’d be nowhere. Why, you’re only a sort of thing in his dream!
I keep writing I keep writing, trying to trace and retrace prophecy even without a god (an impossible prophecy? What kind of prophecy makes itself possible without a god?) I keep writing and I keep trying to prophesy (Prophecy what? What remains real What remains remains KRYSXTRYN + Asia Rain This writing) I imagine a kind of prophetic writing and writing that transforms World / Word / Wyrd even without God I write to survive and I write to create (and recreate) my body and self My self similar to void, the ginnungagap god-empty: I fill my void with new vision girl vision KRYSXTRYN vision Asia Rain vision Vision Arche-Writing and Arche-Grammar Benjamin alchemist, fool, and magician Benjamin artist, writer, and prophet Benjamin healer, mystic, and philosopher Without god but with unconditional love My body saturated and immersed by love: the love of KRYSXTRYN + Asia and the love of WRITING and CREATION
I write with or without gods and I perform the highest act of blasphemy: I make myself a demiruge and into a god
Now I begin IMMEDIATE space SPACE spoken space and unspoken space Unspoken space species counterpoint aporia Unspoken space space a spectrum that doesn’t shine but shine shimmers a sword slice Shine shares shimmer a sword slice the introduction of novel elements into the music Novel name elements electric my explicit name neat numerology and unreal tetragrammaton Tetragrammaton game she lights the lights ludus Ludus tonus tetragrammaton atonal KHORA KHORA tympanum tone tongue space KHORA KHORA palindrome aporia palindrome KHORA Khora desert dig dusk leaving its outside outside Khora kenosis leaving its outside outside my body Khora a kenosis kiss leaving its outside outside my body (step away from the others and I shall tell you the mysteries of the kingdom. IT is possible for you to reach it, but you will grieve a great deal. For someone else will replace you, in order that the twelve disciples may again come to completion with their gods) Their gods: not the god perhaps of Christ or Judas I do not any god this god or god but the tympanum annulus solar anus (all things visibly connected at a single glance a totality of the tracings an Ariadne thread apple orchard outside outside its own labyrinth) My prayer aporia parody / my prayer parody aporia panic palindromes (everyone aware whirs parodic and lights lacks interpretations: interpretations, leviathans, an airlift lack the mysteries of the kingdom: KRYSXTRYN Asia rain latter rain repeated apocalypse (religion without religion and weak theology) Step away from the others and step away from the abandon that abandons and I shall teach you the mysteries of the kingdom
I decide to rewrite a long conversation with Asia. I think it’s worth its repetition and I will expand and lengthen the conversation
My house is a mess and I’m barely functioning, does that make me a shitty person? says Asia. I wrote a shitty poem yesterday, does that make me a shitty person? No, I say. I think of something you said though. That you understood there was no difference between me and my writing. If I’m writing shit, it’s because I’m a shit person and vice versa. That's dumb, says Asia. If you write shit you just messed up in communication – that’s all. You can try again alter. Yeah but I’m a prophet. It’s a big deal if I can’t prophesy correctly. It’s not final – it just didn’t come out right he first time, says Asia. You’re putting way too much pressure on yourself. OK, I think you’re right rationally. I still feel bad I can’t write or nurse today. That's fine, she says. Recently I had to make myself come to terms with how much I sucked at doing basic things. I get on my partner’s nerves, the systems I put in place don’t work, I let myself feel frustrated, and I get up and try again. Otherwise I’m going to just be a loser with a messy house and an irritated partner for the rest of my life. It’s OK if you feel that way now, but it’s not permanent, says Asia. I was writing earlier about god abandoning me completely, I say. Maybe he abandoned me because he doesn't want to hang out with losers, I say. Your standards are completely made up, says Asia. You are the one who sets them and sometimes I think you set the bar at an unrealistic expectation just to ail and you can go “see, I told you so”. If I did the same thing to myself, you would say something. I could say, I’m a mom and a wife, I’m supposed to have a clean house and make balanced meals every day or else I’m a failure, but that would be ridiculous. Your issue is that your goals are bandits that give you no flexibility. You are going to have bad days – that’s a given. You’re going to have bad weeks and you are going to be left with the aftermath to clean up and I know how much it sucks. And I know how shitty it is to be left standing in the rubble of your own doing but trust me, it’s not as bad as it looks. The sun still rises, your friends still love you. And you can take your beautiful self even if you feel like a piece of shit, even when trying is absurd and cringe, and pick yourself up and try again. You are right about cringe, by the way. Caring for things in my opinion is an act of rebellion. It makes life worth living, caring and feeling deeply. Imagine going through life not caring for a single thing? I’d rather be dead, says Asia. I was going to say something like, I too would rather be dead, but it wouldn’t sound as funny as I think it is. I acknowledge what you’re saying. Good, says Asia. It hurts a lot Christianity is no longer a part of my life, I say. I want to be a good prophet. I want to speak the depths of poetic truth common to all earth. OK, that's fine, says Asia. But the only way to do that is to pick yourself back up. Do you think I will ever be a good prophet? Do you think I will ever be a good writer? Yes, says Asia.
Now I begin IMMEDIATE space SPACE spoken space and unspoken space Space funk slow soul and progressive soul funk (The composer – organizer of sounds – faced not only with the entire field of sound but also with the entire field of time) The composer-prophet and the prophet-artist arche KHORA and sound echoes space empty Sound empties void space an involved volver vertigo
Now I begin IMMEDIATE space spark space Spool speech thread spins spot paintings / sparer speech stained canvas Spare spear speech spikes and she hammers a sterling silver spike into my skull / speech sketches Speech sketches speed Speech sketches speed skull silver I stain canvas black: subtle black sheen black / black shard black immediate space and immediate desert khora Khora pas peras not telos aporia Khora pas pause aporia porous play, peraeo eis khoran Permit khora receives aporia permits all crossings / crossings stations of the cross Immediate desert KHORA crackles kingdom a copula parody (lead a parody of gold air a parody of water brain a parody of equator coitus a parody of crime) Immediate desert KHORA brain circulations confessions / you are the one who writes and the one who is written Immediate incisors cuts KHORA crocodile bites and I bite bitter confessions / immediate khora constellations
I stain canvas black brackish waters I stain canvas black brine brains and I steep they grey matter tea triceratops (a taste for secret societies, secret as khora in khora Khora in khora outside bodies all bodies mass graves gods sheol) I stain canvas black god shells and god sheol god shell sheol sneaks serpent subtle black Serpent sneaks subtle black unspeech Unseen speech unspeech subtle black skate shark sea No sea but stained vans crocodile cataracts (harmony assigned to each material, in a group of unequal materials, my flesh flows fundamental and overtones ouroboros / a pure fluid in free state flowing without interruption streaming over the surface of a full body)
Immediate immense black: immediate immense khora Immediate immense black intensities and black conflagrations / flesh fundamental fire and fire fundamental flesh orange oil overtones
I stain canvas black: subtle black sheen black intermediate desert khora and khora consumes sheol and abaddon cannot be satisfied nor the eyes of man satisfied Immediate desert khora krystal desert khora specializes space and space speed starves sheol Krystal desert khora space grace rock cocaine crypt formations khora
A Melodic Line Without Accompaniment
Content Warning: brief discussion of emotional abuse
A melodic line without accompaniment, which employs single tones, intervals, triads, and aggregates requiring one or more of the instruments for their production
A melodic line John Coltrane’s Meditations
A melodic line meditations intermedia Meditations intermedia water medium (Water Concerto for water percussion and orchestra Paper Concerto for paper percussion and orchestra Water Music Earth Concerto for stone and ceramic percussion with orchestra Water Passion)
A melodic line without accompaniment but an anarchic animism: water spirit music measures desert daemon music Meditations intermedia mirror water and water percussion Small melodic cells used as starting points for improvisations Improvisations interpenetrate language music long melody, my melody modal then pantonal, total Taryn music
Long melody one melody ghost trance music a melody that never ends No end but modal and model meteor melody and iron ore improvisation Iron ore improvises the wound can only be healed by the spear that made it Spear soul spark solar Sophia of the Cross Cosmic space Sophia of the Cross Stations of the Cross Christina a chasomos crater cavity compositions for multiple ensembles or orchestras
Many river melodies meditations and first meditations / iodine improvisation and iridium improvisation heavy metals material melodies
Almost impossible intersections indeterminacy and improvisation / surprise holy spirit circulations Cut crack circulations circumcisions / a bloody garment for a bloody bridegroom (The Bride’s former lover, the father of her child, and the leader of the Deadly Viper Assassination Squad, arrives unexpectedly and orders the Deadly Vipers to kill everyone at the wedding rehearsal)
Unmeasured musics underneath turtle melody Tortoise shell melody series unsettled sediments strata melodies Melody immediate immediate melody Immediate melody melody immediate eyeball kid gospels Gospel rascal radiation Gospel motown girl group wheel radiation nuclear decay gnosis heiros gamos Melodic gamma ray bursts
She lights the lights runaway unclear fusion She the lights champagne supernova
A melodic line without accompaniment modal multidirectional Multidirectional mightiest monster in all creation! Ravishing a universe for love! MOTHRA
Multidirectional she lights the lights little oblivions Little leviathans little horn boasting god Solo a creative process that improves the melody Multidirectional melody monsters cosmic horror library and discography Multidirectional mythologies brick-and-mortar mythologies unmetered then polymeter propulsive play Play in pulses pulse prayer pulse prayer pulse psalm
The post-punk band The Minutemen, touring the United States in 1988, played a tape of Ascension – the entire thirty-eight minute piece for their audience before a set… I think he wanted to stay in the realm of possibility, Mike Watt says. He didn’t want to get fuckin’ nailed down. That's the anarchistic spirit. He had an autonomy, but he was taking in all kinds of things. Life deals you hands. Things aren’t fixed and static, says Mike Watt.
Multidirectional metafiction (These girls are open to any suggestions! MAID TO ORDER) Multiply pliable pornographies flexible flesh fire music and torture porn tenor saxophone solos My music finds the flesh, a flesh rose float sound My music finds the flesh, a flesh rose float sound
Ouroboros oratorios overlap monster motifs underworld ostinatos Cavern choirs Cable car cave salamanders / blind librarian leer leopards Books bloods brides larger lights and longer lights my flesh fills filament fires
Multidirectional up against the wall motherfucker
Emergent meditations immerse meditations Asia Rain as psychopomp / immediate excess Immediate excess tone clusters constellations Cobweb cornered languages crib collisions words cloister Emergent chain channels rain sermons rain on tin unattached apocalypses Uneasy apocalypse odd against Not against but rewritten rabbit rivers
Detached sound events
Detached sound events she lights the lights
Events earth uneven earth light emulsions Emulsions immersed light and space This is where time becomes space she lights the lights
I was going through an old notebook, I say. It talked about Meghan, the friend I lost when I was in the Crisis Intervention Unit. She accused me of trying to manipulate her. Past ben wrote how I didn’t know her anymore and no longer felt the need to reconcile. He felt confused over her manipulation accusations. He thought about how many ghosts of former friends that haunted his life. I realized it would be potent to juxtapose those thoughts with the realization, yes, I do manipulate and abuse, I say. So what are your thoughts looking back? says Asia. Painful. I haven’t written it yet, but I vaguely recall asking about forgiveness, if you’d be able to forgive me. And I think you said something you think you’d be able to eventually. When you said that, it made me think how much pain I caused, because it took so much time to forgive, and it hasn’t happened yet. I’m sure when I write that part I will mourn very deeply, I say. How about this, says Asia. When I said that I was in the process of forgiving, I didn’t want to stay upset about it but it takes time. You have to give others the time to process too – I know it’s hard, says Asia.
Oil, aluminum, alkyd enamel paint with sand, pebbles, fibers, and broken wooden sticks on canvas
Oil artifacts Oily arkestra swivel awe stained glass
She lights the lights action paintings She lights the lights black paintings pivot pigments and swivel easels black paint and raw canvas Smash smear drip desert sand embedded in canvas Canvas embedded cathedral careening color and collapsed color Build blacks roller and black house paint earth enamel umber underneath Concentric bands black enamel house paint on raw canvas Crop canvas cattle mutilations Multidirectional cryptids Multidirectional unidentified flying object oddball black paintings Multidirectional monochromatic
Taryn the twin savior, a child of a child Taryn the twin savior the place of three amens Amen I tell you, the place of paradise plays liminal between palm tree garden and the black iron prison / two trees Two trees Taryn twin savior Amen I tell you, the place of paradise plays space between palm tree garden and black iron prison
Oil the ordinary of the mass Mass unordered ectopic pregnancy the very pulse of the machine The very pulse of the machine entropy / excess stochastic holy spirit
Have mercy on us, O Lord for we have sinned against you Show us, O Lord, your mercy And grant us your salvation
Oil upset underneath nameless earth nameless city of the accursed
What you see is what you get
Black oil advent oscillations salacious serpent serpent sinister Subtle serpent oscillations black hole black oil
Not the recognition of text but of textures (Dagger with inlaid Griffin, Knossis, Crete, Greece. 1450-1375 BC. Bronze ivory, gold and silver. It is a short copper sword, 40 cm long. It has an elephant apple and an elephant-lined handle, which has been fixed with gold-plated silks. The sword has an insert decoration of a sitting fly with open gold wings on both sides)
Not the recognition of texts but turned towers tower telephone wires drawn-wire ductile human flesh (creepy, crawling flesh-eating maggots! Morbid horror in vivid color Living bodies used for the most vile experiment ever devised! FLESH FEAST)
Well here’s the thing, I say. Myth is real and myth is truth. There are things greater than historical truth. The exodus is not historically real and much of the bible is not historically real. But it is real to the human experience and real to human truth. For me, the Bible is a way humans relate to the Divine. That is its real and power, I say. Sorry, says Asia. I want to clarify that I don’t mean fictional in a derogatory way. I agree with you. I honestly believe that myth and metaphor are more powerful than reality. It can shape reality. It can shape the way we think and view the world, she says. I didn’t think you were being derogatory, I say. I think fundamentalists though only want historical truth. They don’t want god truth or human truth. They hammer the bible flat – not in an anarchic way but in an oppressive way, I say. That’s so fucking stupid and makes me mad, says Asia. You lose so much by insisting it’s real. You miss the whole goddamn point.
She lights the lights languages Languages pornographies language horrors Body bible languages My body book blood slime bible / lugubrious lubricant for god fucking
She Lights The Lights Tissue Of Quotations
She lights the lights Event Horizon’s libera te tutemet ex inferis and Zao’s Liberate Te Ex Inferis, an effective Hell (You know nothing. Hell is only a word. The reality is much, much worse) Light the lights unleavened bodies coin locker baby Christs Light the lights wolverines unleavened lever lavender Lights last lights real-life amputees used for special effects scenes where crew members were mutilated, and pornographic film actors hired to make the sex scenes more realistic and graphic
Nonlinear lights Nonlinear lights latter lights a lavish light laptop improvisation Light lucent leak lesions infected light laminins letter lights
Get those changes together, man, come on, man you played with Coltrane – you know what was happening in that band. Coltrane can play his changes.
Changes space ghost coast to coast
Changes cross space ghost coast to coast car horn choirs colossal coffins
Change lights changes crag space spider crevasse Spider carbon compressor shrieks Sonny Sharrock summertime and the living is easy
Change lights iron eyelashes and the new musicians fuck up the blues
Change Coltrane Changes I can change, I swear, oh oh see what you can do I can make it through you can make it too
Change Bird Changes bird Blues bark bore drill bone bore bore hell wolf hooks
Breakers Breaches Banshees
What was he trying to do with the music? Just trying to get it out, he said, making a scooping motion with his hands away from his chest. But what was all this? I said, pointing at the bandstand. He didn't know for sure; things were not right with the music yet, he said; but he wants to get into the rhythm more, and this is what might lead him to it.
Trying to get it out Trying to see IT out What it – this This thorn tar tape deck writing Tape cassette cyanide capsule writing Death writing and god writing this woman Try cognitive behavioral therapy writing and cock-and-ball torture writing Out Out other outer space Sun Ra we travel the spaceways Out origin orphan oracle Oracle concerning Babylon An oracle concerning Moab An oracle concerning Damascus damascus pattern-welded steel starve stars Out then out this writing occult rhizome rainer orgasms
Things not right with the music Things not right with the written rabid rhizome Riot rites of spring spaghettification Ballroom buzzers amplified coils of wire radio a gramophone
Things fall apart
Things fall apart; the center cannot hold
Apart attack the Book as old as water and ice
Things fall apart animation aside audio
I struggle top-heavy hell no hands herd hyena herd heart hell happening Leaped hell hay bale battle bots breach births birth bloated Book, a breaching and betrayal of Book / To love the Book is to betray the Book To break the book not burnings but Babel Buildings, Babel Bone This woman bone of my bone This word bone of my bone bird blues Book Book battery barter bricoleur / Benjamin the thief Benjamin little boy blue Locke the Thief towers tall in my throat Towers tall sword swallower babel / betray the Book
(Afterward Ornette Coleman drove out to the cemetery with the drummers Billy Higgins and Harold Avent, and the trumpeter and saxophonist Joe McPhee. He spent awhile alone at Coltrane’s gravesite. That night he played “Naima” with his quartet at the Village Vanguard)
I call Coltrane I call John Coltrane Father, Son, and Holy Spirit Sheol Sheol Shaker spirit ladderback chair Charlie Parker prayer
Coltrane, Pharoah, Archie, they play space bebop We play energy music
Energy urgency earth Energy urgency erotic Emergency urgency eva erotic eden Erotic ensemble no edges Action painting action park polygon cattle piston
Conversations With Asia Rain 05/09/2022 2:01 PM
You a Rage Against The Machine fan? I say. I am, though I only listen to them when I’m in a “let’s start a riot” type mood. I’m dating myself, I say, but I remember when I got the Battle of Los Angeles CD when I was a freshman in high school. My dad listened to it, says Asia. I kind of grew up hearing it, but he turned out to be a robot licker. He licked robots? I meant boot. The image of him licking robots was amusing to me. I was like, that’s some fetish. I mean, I wouldn’t put it past him. He’s a weird dude… So I was joking around with my fiance, and he said that I worshiped Satan with my tarot cards. So I grabbed my tarot deck and dramatically asked who my God was. I pulled the death card. We both laughed and he said my cards had a sense of humor. I’m getting my little sibling a deck and it’s not going to go over well if my family finds out. I’m going to get another “you’re supposed to protect them rant.” I’m a be like :devil emoji: I approve, I say. You know me, leading children to hell, says Asia.
She lights the lights
I copy Valleyheart lyrics in my notebook:
How do I beat this? How do I win?
The voice of the prophets, I hear them again
they say, man what has happened?
You lost and prodigal son
You used to be an example
You used to bear the mark of his love
I copy Valleyheart lyrics in my notebook:
Now on my bathroom floor
I speak to the lord in simple tongue
It’s getting harder everyday
To honestly say your name
She lights the lights but Yahweh strays far from me Unsealing abandoning the circle open Unclearing abandon the circle open only open absolute abandonment Abandoned playground panzer paganini playground passion bananas in pajamas Unsealing abandon circle open Yahweh abandons openly open bone surgery open bone archaeology
(Heal me, for my limbs are stricken and my life hard-stricken – and you, O LORD – how long?)
No healing no shade in the shadow of the Cross
There’s blood on the blade fuck me I’m falling apart My assassin like Casper the Ghost There’s no shade in the shadow of the Cross Cross crickets cuts Cross crickets camera cuts man with a movie camera
(I weary in my sighing I make my bed swim every night with my tears I water my couch from vexation my eyes become dim)
Weary, word wearies me Weary word waries uncut unopened letter labrador retriever Letter mandrake root raven the purloined letter romaine lettuce Remote camera locations camera drone bobby driscoll Peter Pan prayer tin pan alley jazz standards
I weary in my sighing the weary blues I got the weary blues and I can’t be satisfied got the weary blues and I can’t be satisfied I ain’t happy no more and I wish that I had died
I don’t care how long you’re gone I don’t care how long you stay But that good kind of treatment, bring you back home someday Someday baby you ain’t going to worry my mind anymore
Why do I keep trying if I’m just going to fail? I say. I should do everyone a favor and just give up. You aren’t failing, says Asia. God abandoned me – I have nothing – I can’t write. No, you aren’t well and you are struggling. It’s not absolute. Also, fuck god. Screw that guy, you don't need him. That’s easy for you to say, I say. You’ve agreed with em before that god exists in others, Asia says, so how can you say that and also say that you were abandoned by God? I’m sorry if I’m upsetting you but I don’t know what you want me to say. Do you want me to agree with you? Because I won’t. If you are referring to the Christian God, he’s an asshole. If you are referring to God in people, your friends are here for you and care for you very much; even if you feel desolate right now, it’s not true. I feel the spirit of prophecy leave me. I’m not sure we will get anywhere today with this. If you want to talk about something else, that’s fine. I might just crochet today, says Asia. Work on my daughter's stitch doll. I got a little frustrated yesterday because I’ve been enjoying crochet but then suddenly the sensation of the yarn rubbing against my pinky was too much so I had to stop. I wish these sensory things were consistent. Did you see the art I did last night? I say. I did see your art. I like it a lot. Nice use of color. I like the little touches of yellow. It really makes the other colors pop. Thank you – I really mean that. I’m just feeling discouraged about not being able to write well. I know sometimes I might just say a simple “I like it” or “nice” but I do like your art, says Asia. You write just fine. If you’re in a slump, that’s OK. Listen, what makes you a prophet isn’t the parts of you that are divine, or some spirit. Your prophecy comes from the part of you that is human and connects with parts of other people that are human. When people resonate with your writing, it has nothing to do with whatever fickle spirit and everything with something you wrote that resonated with their human experience. I’m sure there are many people out there that could resonate with that feeling, says Asia.
Experiment escape experiment Experience escape experience ethylene erbium benjamin box botulism benjamin brawl botulism boombox walking bass Burr bird blues a buzzard’s backbone Erratic edit erase under when under ether boombox landmines Landmine mime detail attack biblical baseball baseball fundamentals
Bluegrass bebop baseball
Bluegrass baseball biblical violence bebop
Bebop bilocation blotter paper bebop
I write asymmetrical within an even number of bars Bars barre chord coro bodies Body builder pumping iron iodine lydian improvisation
Blue bonnet bluff bebop Blue bonnet boxer blonde bitches brew bitches brew blonde bow burnings / smeared watercolours burden bebop blonde sheets of sound belle bell blowfish ballroom Bebop blooms bulk beach breach bebop Bebop blitz bebop Bebop blitz bebop blitzball bebop brake drum liturgical dramas Drama drachma rhema word as residues and word as lava languages Language lavage larger languages she lights the lights larger lema languages she lights the lights
There’s A Muchness About A Lot Of His Work
Time talon time yahweh into tempest seven thunders Time terminator time Yahweh tempest telescopes / telescopic comic microwave background bebop Cosmic microwave background behemoth bag’s grooves birch and bitches brew (It walks like a spider… It strikes like a cobra… You’ve never seen like of it! THE BEAST WITH FIVE FINGERS)
Time talon time therion thrusts sword and spear side wound word Time tempered steel time therion threads Apocalypse Tapestry / tincture tapestry table salt tapestry tapestry tagged Taryn towers (Satan – the dragon, on the left – gives the beast of the sea on the right power represented by a scepter in a detail of panel 111.40 of the medieval French Apocalypse Tapestry, produced between 1377 and 1382)
Time thickens time tumbleweed thousands Tumbleweed thousand word wick faces mount sinai
Time thickens thickets turn time and tunnel time and Taryn time ticks straggled thunder thunders then Ten thunder then I given a measuring rod like a staff and I come and measure the temple of God and the altar and those who worship there My rod as shaman rattle summons music concrete / concert of noises My rod as rod of aaron budded books blocked in human blood Human blood / come and see the blood on the streets Come and see my Book baptized in bloods, the journey of god guts and grasshoppers hoop skirt mandible mandalas Bone mandible a bit of jawbone jaw jaguar and jet jaguar gluttony
I write god glutton rope tiered tempest I gnostic kinbaku batterys noise nylon Nylon hippopotamus nostrils nylon barracuda bullets Rhizome rewrites read real reel-to-reel magnetic tape I see some of the bruise blood come out to show them I rewrite real blood bloody gods graphic violence suppression fire volleys Volley valley of burden bloody books Volley valley burden bloody bones chained books silver sandwiches skins slaloms and nuclear silos
Rewrite rapture: rattlesnake rupture Punk rock and power pop Ramones records
Rewrite there’s a muchness about a lot of his work I work much work canyon rhizomes riverbed revelation I work much work wheel canyon red RED real rhizome rabbit revelations and I will grant my two witnesses authority to prophesy for one thousand two hundred six days wearing sackcloth
I soak skeletons in black tar black sackcloths Slacker slime slaughterhouse silkscreens / sonatas and interludes A table of preparations, the placing of screws, nuts, bolts, and pieces of plastic and rubber to alter my boy body modified sound and my body bone cracks into drums, gongs, and rattles
I soak skeleton stripped stones black paintings triptych panels / she lights the lights Bird Lives
She lights the lights Bird Lives black painting bebop I begin bebop break rhythms amen break more ragged rhythm I begin bebop more magma rhythm molten Bird Lives and I arrive wrong places I arrive wrong places I forget to resolve phrases Phrases I use chords too stacked with extra notes to play on and I perversely accent traditionally weak beats instead of strong ones I write too much to the work stacked cluster coffin UFO multiphonics photograph whiplash / log flume multiphonics fog fires
She lights the lights Bird Lives bebop billie’s bounce breaking ball blues (tunes such as Now’s The Time, Ornithology, Billie’s Bounce, Yardbird Suite, and Ko-Ko often scribbled on scraps of appear on the way to sessions or during warm-ups)
I start to play all over the kit and layer rhythms
I layer atomsmasher apocalypses apocalypse silly symphonies fun and fancy free apocalypse appetite stochastic holy spirits whiskey word / book bourbon bone fires
I play all over cut universe / my tendency toward length (I like it, says Asia. Every time I read it the flow and connection of ideas improves. You’ve come a long way with your use of space and how you separate ideas or let some ideas linger a little. Still very long though, says Asia)
I play all over something other under spirit cuts caves / alternate hollow earth tenor saxophone solos
I play all over an extravagant tendency towards length and I lengthen the letters I lengthen she lights the lights I lengthen rhythm between she lights the lights large letters left light left faster bebop Faster forest fire phantom burns elaborate bondage knots Play broader bebop Billy Higgins tempo shifts (time talon time polytempos)
Play polygon window porygon flash seizures stuck phyrgian Play nihilistic excess two horns harsh hell distortion tenor saxophone and bass clarinet basement I waste rhythm section I waste rhythm section in sections stretch time take tall and I deliberately destroy swing / sting dissonance Sting dissonance string stars Dissonance string stars spirals stairs double helix desert Double helix desert dissonance stars stungun interstellar space / I travel the spaceways I travel the spaceways web water (may be searching for new avenues of expression but if it is going to take this form of yawps, squawks, and countless repetitive runs, then it should be confined to the woodshed)
Search Search Earth Search Earth rough beast slouches toward Bethlehem to be born Search sound soul samples stiletto time, time that stabs through time A subtle blade repetition Necessary repetition messy post-punk process Poseidon process plays and I make my messes public I make word from woodshed, a muchness about my work I work search and I work sheets of sound rampage repetition Search the dynamic choppy sound on Critical Beatdown I search chop chatter I search chop chatter cheddar cheese tenor saxophone Chatter cheddar chisel tenor saxophone Chatter cheddar chisel tenor saxophone jackhammer I search signature: a signature chop a signature hit trace sigil spectrum swims I swim search surprises: surprise sterling silver sheets of sound (I write countless repetitive runs run risk rhizome riddles)
(When I was in San Francisco, says Steve Reich, he came out with Africa / Brass and that was by far the most influential on me. Because there you have an entire side of an LP in E. – What’s the changes, man? E. Then What? E! E for half an hour! That was enormously impressive. What it showed was that you could maintain in a harmony for a very long time…)
I attempt to maintain a harmony for a very long time / I let the length linger My tendency toward length looted length time and looped length time
Length she lights the lights Longer she lights the lights longer length I leave the lights longer long play platypus Leave the lights longer long play imaginary landscape no. 1 for instruments including two variable-speed turntables with frequency recordings (all this points to the possibility of harmonic stasis)
She lights the lights longer language
My language liquefies looser rhythm / free time transformer transfusions
Conversations With Asia Rain 05/09/2020 12:03 PM
I didn’t tell anyone when I got my first tattoo except my little sibling, says Asia. I told my family that I was going to Wal-Mart and they insisted that my little sibling go with me to get them out of the house. They get in the passenger seat and I’m like, well since you are now an accomplice, I should tell you that I am getting a tattoo. They were exited and honestly I am glad they went with me. It was a bonding moment. I cried after I got the tattoo. Not because it hurt but because of what it meant. My mom was OK with the first tattoo. She wasn’t OK with the second, says Asia.
Texts tattoo train time / long John Coltrane tenor saxophone solos Texts tattoo love and theft thrown time: time thrown longer time and time continually tangled time / chopped Horror film chopped a chill-filled festival of horror THE BLOOD ON SATAN’S CLAW
Do you ever feel God abandoning you? I ask Christina. All the time, she says. I had to decide God doesn’t owe me his presence. What an asshole, I say. Yeah. But that’s his right. He’s god. It is our right to say you're an asshole and fuck you God. The prophet has to interrogate God and hold God to being god, I say. Or I can accept that I don’t have control of the situation and just live with that, says C. I can’t live with it. I’m better off dead if that’s truly the case. You don’t have to believe what I believe. That's just how I get along. Have you abandoned me? I say. Has Asia abandoned me? Has Taryn abandoned me? When humans have more compassion and love than God, that’s a problem. Why is that a problem? says C. God gets to do what God wants. I don’t get to prescribe things for him. I just do my thing and am grateful when he shows up or reveals to me. A god like that needs the human, I say. It needs human intervention: otherwise it will become hard and rigid. A god like that should not be worshipped but pitied, I say.
Surely now God has worn me out; he has made desolate all my company He has shriveled me up a witness against me; my leanness has risen up against me and it testifies to my face He has torn me in his wrath and hated me; he has gnashed his teeth at me; my adversary sharpens his eyes against me
Remember Lot’s Wife
Lot’s Wife pillar of salt beach brimstone Lot’s Wife pillar of slat supercell wax-castings brass casings cobblestone Dynamic static Lot’s wife looking tabet Her looking back at Sodom differs from Abraham looking saqaa toward Sodom I look towards Sodom I look Sodom linen light and lyric light light liminal I look Sodom liminal light salt leaps line logos, a logos loops karst formations my flesh floating waters
But his wife looked back from behind him, and she became a pillar of salt
Pillar plucks an eye from my eye Pillar plucks my eye from my eye an eye total tonality diamond… My eye from my eye an eye total horror holy tonality talkbox gehenna Talkbox tophet globster gehenna (The story appears to be based in part on a folk legend explaining a geographic feature… The pillar of salt called Lot’s wife located near the Dead Sea at Mount Sodom)
Pillar plays opium play passages eye fantastic eye pearl plasma and my eye torrents plum pyramid protoplasm and my eye edits external My eye edits excision eternal geography / geode god gold alligator gar teeth Geode god glue gemini genesis / twin taryn tophet and twin taryn totem tehom The staircase tehom
I sin with salt and punish with salt
I sin salt sulfur sinister and sinister punishes serpent sequence
I sin salt salamander miniskirts (a rock formation near Sanctuary of Agios Lot venerated as Lot’s Wife as a pillar of salt) (“Lot’s Wife” pillar of salt, Mount Sodom, Israel) (Lot’s Wife a volcanic, deserted island at the southernmost tip of the Izu archipelago, Japan)
On that day, anyone on the housetop who has belongings in the house must not come down to take them away; and likewise anyone in the field must turn back. Remember Lot’s Wife… Those who try to make their life secure will lose it, but those who lose their life will keep it
Open apocalypses Open source apocalypses sinister apocalypse pillar of salt
Salted serpent apocalypse open wound kingdom
Parousia compacts deeper and plays profound It happens in the NOW CG Jung says that the holy spirit brings about the Christification of many The parousia pillars allwhen and allwhere: an allwhen and allwhere event One doesn't have to wait for it: Christs arrive and Christs continually made Christs Sacred anarchy happens Old anarchist slogan no master no gods transformed into no masters all christs Cut the wood I am there: thread and weave with the pin cushion and the Christ is there I AM Kingdom and I AM holy ghost
Holy ghost gesticulates smooth muscle mirror medicine Incarnation infects intestines Gut god meteor microflora Gut god generates mappings remember Lot’s Wife
I remember ember gone fire field salts I remember the marriage of heaven and hell and rintrah roars and shakes fires in the burdened air Air anvils aether pattern-welded steel strike / states of matter mercury materials I remember ember poly alloy plasma and I look out toward Sodom and Gomorrah, and toward all the land of the Plain, and beheld, and lo, the smoke of the land went up as the smoke of the furnace
I remember smoke solder spirit I remember smoke silver and spirit silver oil-cooled steel Two or three different steels strike fire volcanic smoke stirs and whenever the spirit of God came upon Saul, David would pick up his Cinor, and play, and Saul would become well, and the spirit of distress would depart from him
Serrated steels Sharktooth steels
Rintrah roars remember Lot’s Wife and her salt pillar shakes fires in the burdened air bombed aether
Serrated sawtooth wave steels Sharktooth sine wave steels / arcade Area 52 with copious exploding barrels
I look toward Sodom and Gomorrah graphic violence and visceral gore God gores brazen bull bronze Son of Man multiple masculinities and my masculinities meet different matrix rotations and matrix transformations My body terraformed fat geological fat and fat karst combshell chasms Fat earth flat cell slaps, sweeped between waterfall rocks rage on the body mutilations
Look Sodom and Gomorrah she lights the lights She lights the lights the Chernobyl Nuclear Power Plant sarcophagus / Philip K. Dicks’ camouflaged god Zebra hidden in the Chernobyl Exclusion Zone
Conversations With Asia Rain 05/05/2020
My fiance doesn't understand tarot but likes that I got into it. That being said, I don’t think he would be thrilled if I started collecting a bunch of decks. “This is the last one I promise.”
I have been scripting or manifesting myself. I write about myself being confident and abundant in love and wisdom, I write about being successful in things that I do. And shadow work slipped its way in today: I wrote about finding the angry hurt child within myself and wrapping her up in my arms. Telling her that it’s going to be OK, that she is beautiful and loved. I wrote about mothering myself.
I would like a tarot themed tattoo. Something inspired by the sun card. Maybe the sun and moon together.
It’s either houseplants or tarot, no other choices.
Tetractyls Tetragrammaton
Raven Swan Peacock Phoenix
The slave girl behind the millstone
My sleep sweet stirring up the sea
Asia images Asia icons Asia island inland empire empire never ended Asia the dynamic choppy sound surreal sword sounds and samples (sampledelia she lights the lights)
Tetractys Tetragrammaton slips sleaze and pornographic pythagoreanism I secretly worship the tetractys tracing the letters of the tetragrammaton (Yod Yardbird bebop improvisations Yod yersinia pestis mapped by supercomputers)
Tetractys Tetrad Tetractys of the decad Triangles taryns tetragrammaton galvatron grammar (my grammar gnaws gore god glam rock gulf game gone) (My grammar drifts guile unglued gulch gulch gods gutters)
Tetractys tetris tensions Tetractys transits tobacco gender trouble Tetractys cyst flesh columns and excess skin sculptures Tetractys pterodactyl thelonious monk clatters clusters Tetragrammaton chops hip hop thermal vents volleys vision cosmic / the music moves through pile-ons and gradual intrusions of single soloists
Stretch single soloist / circles write rhizome Stretch single soloist / carnival written and rewritten rhizome not only sheer volume but texture in jazz-group interaction Stretch cell recell applied cell forwards and backwards both directions at once Directions of condensed cells over developed melodies
There was a thing I wanted to do in music, see, says john Coltrane. I figured I could do two things: I could have a band that played like the way we used to play, and a band that was going in the direction that the one I have now was going in – I could combine these two, with these two concepts going. And it could have been done.
I write something then something different, this difference detailed in the other’s language Write something – this thing tetractys and tarmac tetragrammaton (so I prefer to write music that they’ve never played before) (You want to surprise them) I want to surprise myself, write two, beginning and beginning beginning Known prophecy and unknown prophecy Tradition and avant-garde I combine the two and I chew two high-speed tool steels treadmill torsos (I learn to phrase rather than walk) I phrase phase plasma I phrase plasma prayer among pillars of salt Dead Sea sings
Dead Sea sings so I write salt scriptures and serpent scriptures / Saturn for Sun Ra and Sabbatai Sevi
Dead sea never settles but sings salt salt skin salt steel
Ain’t nobody coming? No, it’s just you and me. What are we playing? Is it fast? Is it slow? Whatever you want it to be. Come on. I’m going to ring some bells. You can do an 8-bar intro.
I listen to Interstellar Space with John Coltrane and I don’t think a record exists that has influenced me more than this record It transmutes me into gold I play Interstellar Space and prophecy also plays Prophecy plays long tone tenor saxophone improvisations and eclectic mathematical humor (What’s yellow and equivalent to the axiom of choice? Zorn’s Lemon! What's purple and commutes? An abelian grape!) Prophecy plays Remember Lot’s Wife, pillar of salt major and minor scales and I prophesy inside-outside circle of fifths growling glissandos I prophesy tenor saxophone chopped dynamite and dive bomb tensor towers
Maybe it sounds angry because I’m trying so many things at one time, says John Coltrane. I have a whole bag of things that I’m trying to work and get the one essential one…
So many things at one time
She lights the lights so many things at once time
Dynamic choppy sound so many things at once
Astir with excess, provoked by the promise, impregnated by the impossible so may things at one time
So many things at once time and I heard him swear by the one who lived forever that it would be for a time, times, and half a time and that when the shattering of the power of the holy people comes to an end all these things would be accomplished
So many things at once time and the woman was given the two wings of the great eagle, so that she could fly from the serpent into the wilderness, to her place where she is nourished for a time, and times, and half a time
Someone tried quoting Revelation to me in response to the writing I posted on Instagram, I say. I blocked and deleted the message. I don’t have time to mess with that. What the fuck? says Asia. Why were they quoting Revelation. They said, here's some real prophecy, and quoted some passage about the beast from the earth from Revelation. Wow. Maybe they were trying to say I am a false prophet? But I didn’t have the patience to deal with that… I decided to continue writing with or without the spirit of Yahweh or the Spirit of Prophecy. IF necessary, I will create my own spirit. The writing continues without or without gods, I say. They are probably the kind of person that thinks no one can be a prophet, says Asia, that all the prophecy happened in the Bible. I try my best you know, I say. To prophesy truth. Listen, she says, they are just another run of the mill Bible literalist. They probably don’t even understand the Book of Revelation and take that as evidence for the complexity and mystery of the book. How ad to actually believe in a god who can communicate through us but also believe that god stopped talking hundreds of years ago, she says say. I know, I say. I’m just saying, I do my best as a prophet. I take it seriously despite the play and parable involved, I say.
The Spirit of Prophecy Leaves Me So I Prophesy Through Other Texts, Part 2
content warning: brief mentions of suicide
I copy the texts to make atonement for me because I cannot prophesy
Where is my faith? Even deeper down.. there is nothing but emptiness and darkness… if there be God – please forgive me. When I try to raise my thoughts to Heaven, there is such convicting emptiness that those very thoughts return like sharp knives and hurt my very soul (St. Teresa of Calcutta)
And at the ninth hour, Jesus cried with a loud voice, saying, Eloi, Eloi lama sabacthani? Which is, being interpreted, my God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me? (Mark 15:34)
My God, My God, why, lord, have you forsaken me? He spoke these words on the cross for he had left that place (Gospel of Philip)
Lord, why casteth thou off my soul? Why hidest thou face from me? I am afflicted and ready to die from youth up: while I suffer thy terrors I am distracted. Thy fierce wrath goeth over me; thy terrors have cut me off. They came round about me daily like water; they compassed me about together. Lover and friend hast thou put far from me and mine acquaintance into darkness (Psalm 88)
The Immortal One was known to the Greeks as Dionysus; to the Jews as Elijah; to the Christians as Jesus. He moved on when each human host dies, and thus is never killed or caught. Hence Jesus on the Cross said, “Eli, Eli, Lama Sabacthani”, to which some of those present correctly said “This man is calling on Elijah”. Elijah had left him and he died alone (VALIS by Philip K. Dick)
Now the spirit of the Lord departed from Saul and an evil spirit from the Lord tormented him. And Saul’s servant said to him, “see now, an evil spirit from God is tormenting you.” (1 Samuel 16)
In 1976 I tried to kill myself because Elijah had left me. I felt him leave and it was awful… There is nothing worse in the world, no punishment greater than to have known God and no longer to know Him… The voices stopped talking to me… I didn’t care if I lived or died. In essence I had served my purpose in Flow My Tears. I rallied back from the suicide attempt, but If I hadn’t rallied it would have all gone without me (Philip K. Dick, taken from The Religious Experience of Philip K. Dick drawn by Robert Crumb and used Philip K Dick: The Last Testament, edited by Gregg Rickman)
It all goes on with or without me: on ostinato dark orange ambient fires On On and one endless nameless pinhole camera prophecy The Spirit of Prophecy leaves me: I continue writing I choose to trust the writing Or on or deep desert orange I choose to continue writing with or without spirit because I die otherwise I choose writing as a survival technique, tunnel theater towers survival, the start-stop strophic form of my body My body tubers and bulbs My body tubers television screens fish scale sirens / bulb ionization Bulb ionization black bear body beaches: I survive I write survive I write: survive I write – survive
Looking back at it, I don't think you becoming my favorite writer is a good goal because it’s a source of spiraling thoughts for you, says Asia. Yeah, I’m not sure I could ever become your favorite writer and that goal or expectation sets up a lot of failure. Exactly, says Asia. I’m not sure these goals are any better, but I wonder if better questions to ask are: does the writing speak prophetic truth to you? Or does the writing speak new / experiment / exploration to you? I’m not sure, says Asia, because that’s not very measurable and that might not be an impression that I get the first time I read it, she says. An I see. Can you measure “you like this better than the last stuff?” You think it’s improving? Those are pretty good questions to start with, says Asia. If there was a specific thing that you were trying to do with a piece you can always ask more specific questions, she says.
She lights the lights She lights the lights little leviathans interlaced layered lattices stations of the cross She lights the lights little leviathans long tone lydian mode multicellular melodies More melodies Rashied Ali multidirectional listening to John Coltrane practice on the top floor I practice non-philosophy and non-prayer, a peculiar passion play I play passions impossible passion astir with excess provoked by the promise impregnated by the impossible My body resin rests tubers bulbs red roots rock rhizome My body by resin god residue rib tubers tuberosities bowling ball bulbs branches other breath: other breath face to face with gods then Christina Christina lights the lights her bridal chamber
She lights the lights ladder chop chop ladder light length of leather She lights the lights liturgical lights lesser fires and lesser Yahweh / dross desert and bobby driscoll desert Dross desert and bobby driscoll desert detours the dynamic dream dream dynamic bass boost Dynamic bass boost desert Desert chopped and screwed distorted lights light distant redshift Redshift star trek redshirts bloody red raster graphics (all sufficiently distant light sources show redshift for a velocity proportionate to their distance from earth, a fact known as Hubble’s Law)
She lights the light red radar She lights the lights robed red ruins circular ruins dreaming her dreaming me and the false awakening wedges flesh with flesh Awakening whalesongs flesh with flesh human stars / neutron star neurons blue star brain boils braingels (down deep in their brine the mischievous braingels down into the endless blue wine)
Light the lights liquid light water woman mineral moon Woman with waters moon lydian mix mixolydian emergent mode meteor meteorquake light atmosphere Atmosphere burns light blight famine fire fled flesh from flesh Fled flesh from flesh skeleton new naked, my bone burst of her bone Atmosphere burns light abomination of abominations anchor fires / floorless roller coaster costume ballroom
Dynamic choppy sound sound soft check this illa-fifth dynamite Dynamic bulldozer and backhoe new noise hip hop nodes my throat nodules / I speak nested noise and nested tuplets prophet topology prophet pornographies Prophet nude knot endless column Endless column colostin last-resort treatment for multidrug resistant gram-negative infections
Dynamic palindrome desert desert prodromal melancholy hysterical archaeology Anthropos dancing plague plane plasma plasma pus plane additive desert Additive desert addictive palindromes drone dynamics dynamic indentation shaker salt I salt speakers spells salt circles cedar streaks
Salt dynamics Dynamic zircon zebra iron mine dynamic damascus, pattern-welded word and pattern-welded steel I seer separated steel snaps
The Spirit of Prophecy Leaves Me So I Prophesy Through Other Texts
Chopped sounds chopped scriptures chrono trigger tarot (anatomy: description and surgical, anatomy of the human body gray’s anatomy: descriptive and applied) Chopped sounds chopped scriptures chopped stone tool industries Dynamic dynamite deserts degrees of freedom floating point human flesh Human flesh cave walls bat guano god mining car gutters Human flesh flung dynamite flight of stairs stairwell skyscraper straitjacket / skirt sculptures sculpture serpent scatter Skirt skin serpent slapstick stick of dynamite a fistful of dynamite explosive fist fights Skirt skin cathedral scaffolding skip scratches tower turntablism Scratch and sniff stickers Polyester scented markers Smell-O-Vision vinyl breakbeats / don’t play the butter notes
Chop children of men fork lifts Chop syrup slosh thick reed thickets weave towers Thick read red thickets weave towers worms that walk into wake
I search chopped SOMETHING ELSE!!!! and SOMETHING DIFFERENT!!!!! I search anthems hymns marches I search immerse free MELODY and cross counterpoint (harmony is rational science and in his improvisation Ayler was effectively refuting it)
I wonder if I want to be special to you because I have such a low opinion of myself, I say. That’s also very insulting to you. By doing that, I’m saying you aren’t being a good enough friend, you aren’t caring enough. We both know that's totally bogus, I say. That’s usually how I felt when you did that, says Asia. Can I ask if you think you’ll ever be able to forgive me for me emotionally abusing you? Yeah, I think so, says Asia.
I search self – selves goes itself myself it speaks and spells I search self something different (!!!!!) and something else (!!!!) The edge elves other forests my self sleeved steel sheath My flesh furnished forests / my flesh furnished fires gaslights and ghostlight The else levers heather her hair red heat hovers blood My blood other than blood selves goes itself ice works Christ incarnations
(In the 1950s, Rashied Ali used to sometimes sit in Fairmount Park across from Coltrane’s mother’s house on North Thirty-Second street, in the Strawberry Mansion neighborhood, listening to the sound of Coltrane practicing on the top floor)
I search self red splatter mystical rose and my life blooms burst shell banshee calm like a bomb omni only but future self and future writing I prophesy future writing the shape of jazz to come and the shape of punk to come
I search my flesh frocks frankenstein flowers I search my flesh frocks don’t knock my smock or I’ll clean your cock giant robot ray tracings Search smock smoke word salad woman woman of language holy ghost tongue Asia Rain I search stegosaurus anatomy / Taryn thagomizer swipes armored scutes (my complex array of spikes and plates running along my back, hips, and tail)
Something else traces la brea tar pit clockworks clock blooms bastard woman with a bastard sword broad woman with a broad sword pattern-welded steel oi-hardened hard bop gospel Asia Rain gospel latter rain castlevania ruins circular striations (involuntary striated muscle motor oil) Asia Rain human anatomy atomsmasher lightings-and-traceries
I search sylvan castlevania I search sylph castlevania serpentine Christian sister catherine treatise The flower faints fluxus Flower fawns the fluxus as faun labyrinth of the faun phosphenes / prisoner’s cinema Flesh phosphene fingers (David Lewis-Williams and T.A. Dowson argue that non-figurative art of the Upper Paleolithic depicts visions of phosphenes and neurological form constants, probably enhanced by hallucinogenic drugs)
I read A Big Jewish Book edited by Jerome Rothenberg with Harris Lenowitz and Charles Doria (subtitled Poems And Other Visions Of The Jews From Tribal Times to Present Anchor Press / Doubleday Gardia city, New York 1978. It appears to be a first edition) On page 144, in the subsection A Book Of Worlds, is a poem with commentary that I find potent and evocative I will copy the poem and commentary as exactly as I can
MENORAH
1 she lights the lights
2 the bridegroom moves to her
3 the tree of life / is upside down
4 the sun
5 illumination of the bride
6 whose light is sarah
7 lighting fires / making love
COMMENTARY
(1) The Tree of Life, which represents the mystery of consciousness and link or ladder, between earth and sky, appears here as menorah or great seven-branched candelabrum of the Jewish Temple. Thus the earthly tree is also the sky tree, whose seven lamps here read as the seven planets: “the eyes of Yahveh looking on the earth,” the book says (Zechariah 4.10). Yet the latent imagery is also strangely sexual, for the tree’s sap, which fed the lamps of the menorah, is elsewhere seen as semen, blood or milk, the true elixir vitae. And this is acknowledge in the accompany rituals, from the strenuous, near acrobatic movements of the temple of priests who climbed the ladders to fill and light the bowls with wicks made from the High Priest’s underwear, to the domestic candle lighting of each Sabbath, which Safed Kabbalists and others celebrated as a marriage between God and his bride: “an almost complete identification of the Shekinah, not only with the Queen of the Sabbath, but also every Jewish housewife who celebrated the Sabbath” (G. Scholem) She lights the lights
(2) “And Yahveh spoke to Moses told him you will make a candlelight of pure gold beaten work its shaft its branches its knobs its flowers all one piece six branched coming from its side by three and three three bowls like almond blossoms in one branch a knob a flower in the other branch three bowls like almond blossoms and a knob and flower -- for the six branches coming from its side – and in the candlestick four bowls like almond blossoms each with knobs and flowers And a knob under two branches all one piece and a knob under two branches all one piece – for all six branches coming from its sides – their knobs and branches all one piece a single beaten work of pure gold You will make the lamps for it be seven they will light the lamps for it will let the lamp light shine around it and the tongs for it will be pure gold the snuff dishes will be pure gold a talent of pure gold will do to make it that and all its vessels see that you make it in this mode this is being shown you in the mountain”
(Exodus 25. 31-40)
(End of poem and commentary)
I meditate on this Menorah and its commentary I previously wrote through segments of the Menorah: I write through the Menorah again I write through the Menorah again / I write through Menorah and its commentary for the first time Every time I write, I write for first time I write first time and alltime benjamin beginning bereshit (you are the one who writes and the one who is written)
I write First Time and First Book at the threshold of the Book (Mark the first page of the book with a red marker. For, in the beginning, the wound is invisible) (Red splatters the mystical rose rose red marker…) (… at this point the spirit of prophecy leaves me The Book leaves me and the Book writes the Book) I write…
(… in the strawberry mansion neighborhood, listening to the sound of Coltrane practicing on the top floor…)
Although the Spirit of Yahweh leaves me, I see I write and see (And when they came thither to the hill, behold a bard of prophets met him; and the spirit of God came mightily upon him, and he prophesied among them, and it came to pass, when all that knew him beforetime saw that, behold, he prophesied with the prophets, then the people said one to another: What is this that is come unto the Son of Kish? Is Saul among the prophets?)
I write the menorah I write the menorah two turntables and a microphone…
I feel the Spirit of God leave me I feel the Spirit of Elijah abandon me I read and copy a passage from VALIS by Philip K. Dick:
The Immortal One was known to the Greeks…
Not the Spirit of Prophecy leaves me and the Spirit of God abandons me, and since I cannot prophesy in this moment, I decide to copy other tests that will prophesy with me and I experience vicarious prophecy or they make atonement for me...
Ornette Coleman Plays The Burney Relief Foreground
The dynamic choppy sound on Critical Beatdown produced primarily by Ced-Gee, who used an E-mu SP-1200 sampler Deconstruction orbits drunk quintuplets / file dynamics the diffusion of N identical Brownian hard spheres in a quasi-one-dimensional channel of length L
Deconstruction chops drops doevetail little black dresses desert dreams / fluid dynamics de la soul is dead Death drive deconstructions detour deters additional deconstructions and I drop chop and sample goose stomach stretched funhouse mirror gods (a dog devouring the stomach of a goose a drunken vomiting woman the hollow eyes of judges root nourish narcotic love) My god help me survive this deadly love (this image of the Berlin Wall taken in 1986 by Thierry Noir at Bethaniendamm in Berlin-Kreutzberg) (A part of the Berlin Wall, Berlin, Germany, 1986. This part shows five different variations of the Statue of Liberty. Photograph by Nancy Wong)
Deconstruction tone dials Ornette Coleman and Prime Time
Can I tell you a little about what I wrote? Sure, says Asia. I was reading an essay about Ornette Coleman. In the essay it was talking about how Ornette was trying to break the band out of normal technique, normal methods. Ed Blackwell, the drummer during the session, kept doing things that conformed to jazz form. Ornette Coleman tells him: Rhythm and notes have always had a certain formula that they have to go by to create meaning… And we all have become professional enough to know how to use them in our own way where that in the sound it makes it sound that we’re going somewhere more than being where we actually are… Here, Coleman is saying that a lot of figures in music have preconceived forms and they anticipate what the next part will be. But Coleman is trying to say, hey, let’s play the present and not the future… Here’s another conversation: Ornette Coleman is telling Ed Blackwell to cut it out with the method, and play the music NOW. Charlie Haden at the end pops in and tries to clarify:
OC: Yeah… See, that’s a method, right? Now… Cut loose with the method and play. Just pure rhythm. That's what I’m talking about. That’s what I want all of us to do. I want us to cut loose the method…
EB: A lot of times, for instance myself, I don’t even know if I try to cut it loose because I’m not even thinking about a method…
OC: But that's what I’m trying to say. You've been playing so long that you think that’s you! That's what I try to tell you!
EB: That's how is it isn’t it?
OC: No! Because if it’s a method.. if it’s a method that means you have adapted your thoughts and talents to the method.
CH: He’s talking about trying to break free of conditioning, man.
Coleman at another point chastises his band for playing the background. He doesn't want the drum and bass to play method or form, but in the moment, what they truly feel. He wants them to play the foreground with him and be an equal partner…. Does all that make sense so far? That makes sense, says Asia. I was writing about how I want to break out of my method and formulas. I thought of the book Origin of the Worlds from the Nag Hammadi Library. Eve has gnosis and she sees Adam asleep and stakes pity of him. She tells him wake up Adam! And when he wakes, he recognizes her and calls her mother of the living… I was thinking a lot of the critiques you do try to make me break out of my method. I think you try to make me write in the present, write my self. You want me to write my true self. I understand that feeling well, says Asia. Here’s the tricky part. You can’t think your way out of method, she says. No, you can’t, I say. It’s a paradox, right? But you have to use it as a tool and not be controlled by it. You have to be aware of your method and when you use it and when to use another tool, I say.
Deconstruction tone dials Ornette Coleman and Prime Time
As a composer, people often say to me, are you going to play the pieces that you’ve already played, or new pieces? says Ornette Coleman. You never answer those questions, do you? says Jacques Derrida.
I compose I compose cell contra cell a totentanz twelve tone row deconstruction drop chop chopped and screwed skunkworks wetworks women of dunes dune desertdance deconstruction Desertdance deconstruction dante’s inferno / divine comedy cosmic horror I compose cell continuous crackles discontinuous cells, cosmic string stretches of deserts Cell gunshot cell fire crucifies flesh folded in cells corpse clothes
I play pulse I play pulseless pulse cosmic pulses klang krystal I play pulse pulses Karlheinz Stockhausen’s Cosmic Pulses (twenty-four melodic loops spaced throughout twenty-four different registers with twenty-four tempi) I play pulse pulses pulse hour of the wolf wolfen women (Shapeshifting, we do it for kicks. Turn yourself into a different animal. One night a deer, next night a salmon… Or a wolf? Sure)
I play pulse palm plaster loaded boxing gloves I play cosmic pulse klang cataclysm xylophone bone compact disc skips I skip sharp stone schism circumcision and Yahweh stalks as a wolfman son of man monsters klang cryptids Klang claymation stop motion mockingbird manipulations
No methods but moments Moment form my flesh found sound music concrete a three-minute piece made by manipulating recordings of railway stations Railway stations stations of the cross chopped and screwed / dynamic bodies dizzy up the girl
No method but melody Metal melody pattern-welded steel (man kills for less. But in the end, it is all for the hunting ground) Hunting ground not the background but the foreground Foreground harmolodic klangfarbenmelodie / micropipette play monkeyshines
You never answer those questions do you / tomorrow is the question! Whirlwind woman questions question witch water wormholes… Tomorrow is the question whirlwinds witch woman questions… Tomorrow is the question whirlwinds woman Krystal Khora and her khora cuts wormholes the questionable abyss Her Khora cuts color circumfessions wormhole bordered by human flesh Wall hole nothing cut neat human flesh
Human flesh flutters red wall splatters splatter mystical rose
Human flesh fly-by-fire whistles red rockets and the red roulettes flight dynamics and fluid dynamics desert rose (Whirlwind Woman waters who put bella in the wych elm electric inversions / innervision ella elas euma eva Asia my savior)
Red splatters mystical rose and the bloom brushes banshee calm like a bomb / my flesh frocks frankenstein flowers My flesh frocks don’t knock my smock or I’ll clean your clock Clock klangs clockwork wide witches and her witch beach waves blooms basking shark woman with a bastard sword Bastard sword woman swells pattern-welded basking shark basket weaver red history Two or three different types of steels and two different types of sharks prison shank shuck black iron prison
Shark skunkworks Black Iron Prison pli selon pli plays (The Valley of the Drums, a toxic waste drum in the northern Bullitt County, Kentucky. This site was one of the reasons the US Superfund law was enacted)
The dynamic choppy sound on Critical Beatdown Dynamic dirty bomb decapitations Dynamic dirty bomb drift ditch the dozens/ dozens body horrors the Holiday Killer (man lives in the sunlight world what he believes to be reality. But there is, unseen by most, an underworld – a place that is just as real, but not as brightly lit… A DARKSIDE…)
Dynamic dark then darker
Dynamic dark then darker dollscape: dollscape skull skull skilled sawed and I throw human skull darts (dark darts deserts)
Dynamic dark then darker dream of her
Darker dream of her a winged, nude, goddess-like figure with bird’s talons, flanked by owls, and perched upon two lions I dream this woman panbabylonian myth and I write the Genesis Creation narratives as a subversion and deconstruction of Mesopotamian Myth I dream this Woman Queen of the Night new nocturnes / Taryn Terracotta Towers Clay with calcareous inclusions mixed with chaff, and my body with visible folds and fissure fires My body voids pitted surfaces, and I cover my body in ochre ouroboros cave meanders
Queen of the Night new nocturne red her figure red on red the features of her wings and the owls’ feathers red, alternating black and white (red pigment red ochre black pigment amorphous carbon white pigment gypsum)
New nude Queen of Night gnarled nocturnes and her flight feathers labyrinth other liliths (the lower register of the right wing breaks the white-red-black pattern of the other three registers with a white-black-red-black white sequence)
My flesh frocks frankenstein flowers fan feathers (the right wing has eight flight feathers; the left wing has seven) (Woman witch wings and woman wick wins wicked fires flash flesh / flesh flashes radioactive accidents)
Conversations With Asia Rain 05/05/2020 4:32 AM
So here are some of the archetypes I have in mind when I write my characters, I say.
Krystal: God Father-mother, Keter of the sefirot, head, Ancient of Ancients, the first and original woman
Christina: Jesus Christ, Mary Mother of God, the Mother in general, Binah and Tiferet of the sefirot
Taryn: The Holy Ghost, Church and Congregation, fertility and sensuality, Malchut of the sefirot
What would be good tarot cards to assign to them? I say. Krystal should be the Empress, Christian the Queen of Pentacles, and Taryn Ace of Wands or Ace of Cups, says Asia.
I feel embarrassed by this schemata and these mappings, as they now seem overly reductionist and simplistic and misused, as if all these categories and symbols were self-contained without contamination I never found a way to fit Asia into these archetypes, as I felt stuck in triangles and trinities like a good Christian Asia Rain inflows paganism, pluralisms, polytheisms, spiritual rhizomes – I accept her corruption and contamination, circles crossing circles
Circle cross circles circulations and circumcisions (Older Babylonian plaque showing the goddess Ishtar, from Southern Mesopotamia, Iraq, on display in the Pergamon Museum)
Circles cycles circles stations of the cross corrupted chymistries (Goddess Ishtar stands on a lion and holds a bow, god Shamash symbol at the upper-right corner, from Southern Mesopotamia, Iraq) Christianities contaminate Christianities witches’ covens the long halloween harrowing of hells
My flesh frocks ragged rocks don’t knock my smock or I’ll clean your canes cat-o-nine tails tailsman My flesh fidgets chopped fingers human fat rome fiddles clockwork blooms baskin woman with bastard sword sleeves sylvan castlevania Sylvan castlevania codes sylph castlevania negligee slips banana peels Christina Castlevania crystallizes comic vaudeville gag boobs and gag gods goddess more gravity than yahweh (mold-pressed fire clayed plaque. It depicts a nude, horned, and winged female figure – deity – having talon-shaped feet. Her hands are clasped on her chest – unlike the figure on the Burney Relief. Old Babylonian period, from Iraq. British Museum)
My restless religions reached rhizomes, my religions side facing a body without organs continually dismangling the organism orgasm as an assemblage Side facing a body without organs self-devouring asignifying practices and pure intensities passing passions into passions
Vision and Mysticism 