Fuck continuity     Fuck continuity and sense and good-and-literary writing     I embrace the bad, the absurd, and the nonsensical as a sort of art therapy and therapeutic writing     PROCESS heals     benjamin fisher king and wound does not heal: PROCESS heals     Fuck continuity the wound can only be healed by the spear that made it (Perceval arrives at the Grail Castle, to be greeted by the Fisher King, from a 1330 manuscript of Perceval ou le Conte de Graal by Chrétien de Troyes, BuF Francais 12577, fol. 18v)

Fuck continuity and poetry     I become machine     I become automatic     I become artificial intelligence

See holds sophisticates     See see girls it went     See the considered no color     The the you the class scene wrestling     See riot the sex wild ORGY so sting     See riot the sex wild ORGY so place     You wild in screw dice party     raid sessions     See games     The LIL’s a THE run attempted barred blushing assault beautiful     See didn’t everything vice whipped limit square of to strip     Were seethe

Fuck continuity foe funk future funk     I machine   I automatic   I artificial intelligence

Scene wrestling     See riot the sex wild orgy

Scene wrestling exotic writing     Scene wrestling I write     Scene I wrestle writing riot erotic     Riot erotic earth excessive eroticism     Wrestle write twelve-tone row then random     Random cut aleatoric chance cut the process of registral and instrumental transfer turned inside-out: woodwind center moves out to the extremes of the keyboard     Trace cut tracées continuum / fuck continuity then cue keep deep funk     Not flaccid funk but an erect fuck fuck (phallocentric crypt-keeper copulation / a pornographic undead)

Rapid writing wrestle     Rapid write wrestle give ‘em more rope / rope rupture rapture     Rapid arpeggiation adjust the aperture to focus on the negative live phosphors in the darkroom ignite

Sea the square strip     See raid beautiful class assault passions     See party everything     I party pornography     I party porneia     I party party porneia waheb in syphah and the valleys of the arnon and the slope of the valleys and extends to the seat of Ar and leans to the border of Moab     PLACE were you of scene blushing color girls girl flesh FRANKENHOOKER a terrifying tale of sluts and bolts

Every page must explore, either by profound heavy seriousness, the whirlwind, poetic frenzy, the new, the eternal, the crushing jokes enthusiasm for principles, or by the way in which it is printed…

An experimental composition aims to set in motion a system or organism that will generate unique (that is, not necessarily repeatable) outputs, but that, at the same time, seeks to limit the range of these outputs.  This is a tenderly towards a “class of goals” rather than a particular goal, and it is distinct from the “goalless behavior” (indeterminacy) idea that gained currency in the 1960s…

Experiment excrement     Experiment excess     Experiment immediate (immediate DESERT infinite DESERT immediately)     Immediate desert experiment Book of Sand excrement / dung beetles and dugong diarrhea     Dung beetle dugong dada and every page explodes     Every page explodes immediate desert     Every past explodes porneia immediate desert entre often even between     Between benjamin every page explodes irma explicit obscene     Obscene orchestra overtures experiments

The blossoms have appeared on the earth, the time of pruning has arrived; the voice of turtledoves heard in our land

Between blossom fire burnings     Between blossoms fire further palimpsests     Between blossom fire scrapes parchment with several superimposes texts different layers (I layer compositional process and I compose by writing over an existing different text)

The blossoms appear on earth in the beginning (in the beginning, experiment) (In the beginning, ugly     In the beginning, I write ugly automatic     I write ugly machine every coupling of machines the sound of the machine running unbearable to the body of organs)

Blossom between FRANKENHOOKER hockets counterinside contra counteroutside     Counterinside counterpoint punctum para punctum counteroutside ouroboros counterinside / inside IMMEDIATE desert     Inside inside IMMEDIATE desert aleatoric anthropology     Aleatoric archaic human / hover archaeology     Aleatoric apple orchard agon again arson

I write a combination of silent hysteria, partially coloured canvases, daubed flats, painted faces, and the unnatural broken gestures and action

Coloured vans chimera sledgehammer city cicadas     Canvas convex coffin texts      Canvas convex curtain serpent coil mirror     Disjunct mirror disjunct canvas driving desert

I don’t think I’m adding to anyone’s lives so there’s not point in me being here.  Yes, you are, says Asia.  No one cares.  Life goes on.  What’s done is done.  I don’t belong anywhere.  Lots of people care.  I’m having a hard time nursing and I’m having a hard time writing.  I don’t think I will ever meet my expectations for either.  I feel I failed as a person.  I don’t know what to do now.  Look at this slug, says Asia.  The slug will heal you – look into its eyes.  If you need something extra potent then behold and hold onto your chair:  the rubberduck isopod.  It’s pretty amazing but I’m still a shit writer.  My house is a mess and I’m barely functioning, says Asia.  Does that make me a shitty person?  I wrote a shitty poem yesterday, does that make me a shitty person?  No, I say.  I think of something you said though.  That you understood there was no difference between me and my writing.  If I’m writing shit, it’s because I’m a shit person and vice versa.  That’s dumb, she says.  If you write shit, you just messed up in communication.  That's all.  You try again later.  It’s not final, it just didn’t come out right the first time.  Yes, but I’m a prophet.  It’s a big deal if I can’t prophesy correctly.  You are putting way too much pressure on yourself, says Asia.  OK, I think you’re right rationally.  I still feel bad I can’t write or nurse today.  That's fine, says Asia.  Recently I had to make myself come to terms with how much I sucked at doing basic things.  I get on my partner’s nerves, the systems I put in place don’t work, etc.  I let myself feel frustrated, then I get up and try again.  Otherwise I’m just going to just be a loser with a messy house and an irritated partner for the rest of my life.  It’s OK if you feel that way now but it’s not permanent, she says.  I have felt like a loser all my life, I say.  I feel like I’m Charlie Brown.  I don’t think I’m going to shake it… I was writing earlier about God abandoning me completely.  Maybe he abandoned me because he doesn't want to hang out with losers, I say.  Your standards are completely made up, says Asia.  You are the one who sets the and sometimes I think you set the bar at an unrealistic expectations just so you fail and you can go “see, I told you so”.  If I did the same thing to myself you would say something.  I could say “I’m a mom and a wife, I’m supposed to have a clean house and make balanced meals everyday or else I’m a failure” but that would be ridiculous.  Your issue is your goals are bandits and you give yourself no flexibility.  You are going to have bad days – that’s given.  You are going to have bad weeks and you are going to be left with the aftermath to clean up and I know how much it sucks.  And I know how shitty it is to be left standing in the rubble of your own doing but trust me – it’s not as bad as it looks.  The sun rises, your friends still love you.  And you can take your beautiful self even if you feel like a complete piece of shit, even when trying is absurd and cringe, and pick yourself back up and try again.  You are right about the cringe by the way.  Caring for things in my opinion is an act of rebellion.  It makes life worth living.  Caring and feeling deeply.  Imagine going through life not caring about a single thing?  I’d rather be dead, says Asia.

Limit screw party     Limit screw party no whipping     PLACE the sex passions     The sex passions the color see wild everything     See wild the see ‘art’      See riot class wrestling games the you ORGY     to go dice LIL’S blushing strip girls THE     see run see

An experimental composition aims     An experimental composition aims aims FRANKENHOOKER     Beneath its organs it senses larvae and loathsome worms and God works messing up my body massachusetts and mississippi    Makeshift     Makeshift makeslip make shit      Make shit texas chain saw massacre every page explodes corpses     Explode corpses monster party ORGY AT LIL’S PLACE     She lights the lights betrothed to the glockenspiel of hell      She lights the lights the bridegroom moves to her betrothed to the glockenspiel of hell     An experiment hell and an experiment real hell

An experiment hell into the impossible     An experiment hell in total darkness, or in a very large room, very quietly     An experiment very hell and real hell frees the recording back out of the medium

I enter desert and I never desert but desert takes me     Desert takes me thief in the night transmigration of timothy archer (no single thing abides and all things things fuck up)      different divisions in desert / random remainders in desert     Desert clockwork tower worked shoot holy spirit star spangled banner between     I banner between and below      Desert clockwork tower tehom haunted homilies and desert arms approach arithmetic insect desert black dress     I never reach desert dripping dream but desert takes dream dripping desert dream

When an ox gores a man or woman, the ox shall be stoned, and its flesh shall not be eaten

I eat the flesh of the man and the woman     I eat flesh fire flat and I receive from the lord what I also delivered to you, that the Lord Jesus on the night when he was betrayed, took bread, and when he had given thanks, he broke said, This is my body which is for you do this in remembrance of me

I left the church, I say to Ann Marie.  God absolutely abandoned me.  The Church does not own God, she says.  I am sorry God has abandoned you.  I pray you will be found by the love in whatever form you are to encounter it.  You are a good person who has suffered much, she says.  I left last month, I say [I send Ann Marie the message I wrote to St. Benedict’s].  This is a powerful message, says Ann Marie.  Christian or not (though I now am) my first language has always been the bible.  It speaks to me whether I am in or out of the church.  To be the veil must be a very painful and challenging place.  I can tell you that there are those in me who have been among those who weep and gnash their teeth.  And God sent an ant to find me, she says.  Asia says I need a new god, I say.  The god I know is abusive and toxic and I should abandon him and invent my own God, she says, I say.  My own experience of the ‘abusive God’ meant that I could only cross into thew New Testament by letting it come and find me there in the Old, says Ann Marie.  For me Hebrew language itself is richer landscape.  NT sometimes makes me feel naked and exposed.  Perhaps the veil is the chrysalis.  Perhaps you are the chrysalis of a new song one day to be sung.  That is my hope.  That is my prayer, says Ann Marie.

If I ascend to heaven thou art there     If I make my bed in sheol thou art there     If I take the wings of the morning and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there thy right hand shall lead me and thy right hand shall hold me

Right hand rigid hell     Right hand hell old wineskins     right hand hacksaw signs gospel twelve-tone row a plucked right eye     Right hand right eye hell uncertain sheol

Uncertain sheol aleatoric hades     Hell experiments body: an eye   a hand   a text     Text tempted flesh frame story / the apple of my eye as my eye framed flesh and my eye urgent flesh emergent emergency (emergency experience     emergency IMMEDIATE     immediate experiment emergency) (Tony William's Lifetime EMERGENCY)

be vision becomes woman

be vision becomes woman: everything wild everything and passions orgy

be vision becomes woman everything wild and everything and passions orgy     Flesh woman orgy the and the the limitations     Orgy the   and   the   the   to   limitation     Limitation she lights the lights unlimited she lights the lights

Everything everything orgy for beyond artificial orgy     My artificial body experiments FRANKENHOOKER slugs and bolts bottomless pit

And the fifth angel blew his trumpet and I saw a star fallen from heaven to earth and he was given the key of the shaft of the bottomless pit; he opened the shaft of the bottomless pit and from the shaft rose smoke like the smoke of the great furnace, and the sun and air darkness with the smoke of the shaft

And the fifth angel blew his trumpet a trumpet punch scatters     A trumpet punch scatters tetragrammaton     Trumpet punch in a penal colony     Textures stabs tattoo stiletto     Stiletto stick stickley nickelodeon desert dam from adam desert

Desert takes me thief in the night transmigration of timothy archer (no simple thing abides; and all things are fucked up)     All things fuck up desert dome desert the desert dover boys     The desert dover boys binge drink limited animation opera appomattox and portrait Einstein of the Beach

Desert dome desert would it get some wind for the sailboat and it could get for it is     Desert dome desert it could get the railroad for these workers and it could be were it is     Desert dome desert it could frankly it could be frankly it could be very flesh and clean it could be a balloon

Delicious desert dome balloon honeybee delicious     Delicious desert dome eye delicious Yahweh you yam suf eye cream

Desert dime novel noise     Hot-air balloon noise not really a novel but a negative theology (negative theology not only a language and testing of language but the most exactly intractable experience of the essence of language: a discourses on language, a monologue...)