I Do Not Develop The Rose But Extend The Rose, Part 1

The leaves of the rose grow in clusters of five, nine, or thirteen leaves     Between Elohim and Elohim, five words with grammar five divine leaves

Leaves layer a single notes in various patterns: leaves loop a single sustained wavering line     Leaves sustain single tone fragments and I feel the fragments as manuscripts     I fold fragments as scripture (the only scripture unravels leaves of grass     the only scripture spools skin son of man)

The leaves of the rose repeat a void and repeat the void     Rose leaves repeat void commercially available fluorescent light     (Rose leaves exposed bone the void matrix)     Rose and void fragment my body albeit in non-overlapping fragments     Rose and void find desert in disjunct fragments: I rearrange the fragments in varying leaf clusters     I arrange the irregular line rhythm up rhythm down desert, and I surprise the sand cats with syncopation     I syncopate fragments as horn hits in the chromatic desert     I comb sardine sand dollar chromatic / surprise polymeter sand cats     (Desert combs chromatic panic attacks     Fragments attack sudden staccato)

I examine the fragment as the flesh of my body.  I feel my flesh in fragments and my body breaks disjunct across the sand bar.  I examine the fragment and feel out its experiments: fragment experiments brief flashes of bioluminescence light in the bathypelagic zone.  I alternate light fragments and word fragments to find a new mosaic sheets of sound: I search a sheets of sound collage bricoleured from bioluminescent and fucked-body syntax.  I examine the fragment as flint or granite, and its friction rubs rose light and light escaping the eye.  I examine the eye of the fragment and the fragment of the eye.  My eyes break into oceanic fragments interrupted by jar jellies and tentacle tasers.

The leaves of the rose grow in clusters of five, nine, or thirteen leaves     I grow leaf fragments: I grow the single sustained fragmented forest (fragments fragment     fragment fragment: fragment forest fragments)     Forest fragment looks fresnel lens lambda lamb of god (lamb of god who takes away the sins of the world, have mercy on this machine forest and forest monster)     Forest ferments in fragments, a holy spirit sputnik syntax     Line fragments blur forest light lobe lizards: low lizards scissor texture

Leaf fragments refract fractal textures     Low lizard scissor textures fragments larva lizard lava textures    (I do not explain the textures but revel in their kinesthetic rubble)     Larva light loud lizard texture, a line refracting lower and higher registers     Larva lava light beach lizards longer stone length: lizard bench press beach (I rapidly rearrange the beach glass fragments and sand textures)

A past Asia had this story idea, I say.  A person in a haunted house but discovering the ghosts are all different versions of themselves.  I was thinking what different versions of ben would haunt a house: a depressed sullen ben, a manic crazy ben, etc.  Like 13 Ghosts, I guess, except it’s all you, I say.  Oh damn, that’s a good idea, says Asia.  I’m a genius.  Too bad I can’t remember anything, she says.

I don’t remember fragments but they ghost as beach glass and discarded rose leaves     (Fragments remember for me in the form of beach foam ghosts) (You are a genius, I say to Asia.  That’s why you have me to remember for you.  I don’t remember anything either.  That’s why I write: write to remember, I say.)     I don’t remember fragments but beach ghosts chant the leaves of the rose grow in clusters of five, nine, or thirteen leaves     Leaves linger a stone tape on beach beaches and volcanic pebbles     (I parable pebbles and paddles, a pouring out of holy ghosts) (I prepare the parables of the holy ghost as a division of thirteen ghosts)

Thirteen ghosts garment beach body without organs     Thirteen ghosts gown beach crown of thorns / theater of the absurd     Beach inhabits different bens as ghost fragments and I play the beach pebble bodies     I play beach pink forest starfish     Starfish fragment YHVH yosemite and I yoke myself to maypole ritual     I make a maypole triptych from rose leaves and they cluster blood clot fragments     Triptych tile repetition Morton Feldman fragments (Patterns are complete in themselves and in no need of development, only extension.  My concern is: what is its scale when prolonged, and what is the best method to arrive at it?)

I forest fragments which are complete forests in themselves, but I continue to extend the forest.  I populate the forest with roses and their leaf clusters extend a forest clustered white and pink.  I fragment, which are complete fragments in themselves and their selves beach flesh.  Their selves befriend flesh: hail the new flesh.  My flesh floats forest fragments and I extend my flesh as a spore colony body horror.  My forest appendages proliferate fragments.

Patterns are complete in themselves, and in no need of development, only extension     I do not develop but extend / I only repeat fragment developing variation variation     I don’t repeat repetition now knot knot: not knot but know knot beach beach and grocery aisle     I walk no repetition upward grocery aisles and its islands superimpose beaches     Grocery aisles meander interior laboratory corridors and secret bases in comic books     I repeat no repeat pail sail knots: clipper variations barber development

The leaves of the rose grows in clusters of five, nine, and thirteen leaves     Leaves link patterns and fragments     Leaves link link to the past patterns and fragments of the masamune     Leaves link a rose language roses rhizome     I do not develop the roses but extend: their stem extension swashbuckles door hinge   hinge open language man o’war

I play with patterns but the patterns puzzle me.  Patterns play me as much as I play the patterns, and their challenges charge several failed experiments on the page.  I compose pages of patterns complete in themselves, and I love their alternating light and dark on the page.  I accept my failures as still-interesting experiments and explorations, and I never stop exploring.  I explore cave pattern experiment and desert patterns exploration no end (I play a desert music: it is a principle of music to repeat the theme.  Repeat again and as again as the pace mounts.  The theme is difficult but no more difficult than the facts to be resolved).  The patterns are difficult but no more difficult than the pages to be resolved.

I do not develop but extend: I extend leaf clusters in five, nine, and thirteen leaves, and the leaves scale large orbits (the Book not a map, but a many-body problem composed of many orbiting galaxian systems)     I repeat the roses, for there is a rose and then there is a rose     I repeat the roses Asia Rhizome and Asia With Weevils and we share the forest spider word

Yesterday, one of my coteachers was talking about stepping on spiders with another teacher, says Asia.  The other teacher said, “Don’t you hate it when you step on them and a bunch of babies run out?” and my coteacher said “I hate it when they do that.”  I butted in and said, “THEY didn’t do that.  YOU are the one that stepped on them.”  We also got a new student yesterday who was wearing a Slipknot shirt.  My coteacher told me the t-shirt made her uncomfortable because it was demonic, and I was like “Ma’am, it’s a generic band t-shirt.  I don’t think that a 12-year old is a devil worshipper,” says Asia.  Asia, great defender of spiders, I say.  

There is a rose and then there is a rose: her rose with leaf clusters of five, nine, and thirteen tent a stairway of spiders     Rose architects arachnid clusters and cicada crowds, and I compose a stochastic spider melody     I connect a spider medley of leaf clusters and her harmony arranges spiders into stochastic vertical columns

Prophecy Of The Rose

The leaves of the rose grows in clusters of five, nine, and thirteen leaves

Leaves leaven light and even light leaves leaven light uneven lights the bubblegum gradient of the rose

Leaves leaven elephant light glacial insects (glacial insects glint light gradient to gradient the grand green of the rose) Leaves layer elephant lights light cassette tape loops Loops light leaves glaciers / glacial lights sharpen leaf ice

Leavens glisten glacier light light rib erosion Light erodes insect leaves turn inside you Leaves turn haft half stone insects (insects select light glacial erratic) Leaves turn rocking light rotations and I imbibe leaf light I imbibe light insect inlets and inlets turn leaves looking I look leaf light labyrinths (to write leaf labyrinths look late Morton Feldman and I draw the desert with curtains drawn)

The leaves of the rose grow in clusters of five, nine, and thirteen leaves Thirteen leaves thread tense textures: thirteen leaves trusses textures and tensions present tense

There is a rose and then there is a rose: the rose reveals real. There is a rose and the rose reveals a rare rhizome and a real rhizome, and the rhizome plays the labyrinth of leaf clusters. There is a rose and then there is a rose, and I remember this rose in rhizome. This rose rhizome repeats leaves and clusters, a grand green labyrinth and a labyrinth grand guinol. I remember this rose in the multiplicity of its clusters and these clusters cling to a city desert crowded by coyotes. The rose of the coyote slices canine leaves and the leaves lace additional light from the desert skies.

The leaves of the rose grow in clusters of five, nine, and thirteen leaves Leaves lengthen labyrinth light vertical visible Leaves tongue a vertical light verdigris a generous leaf light labyrinth Present tense labyrinth lights a verdigris gut babel (babel gog and magog tower of babel) Leaves imprint insect tensions and textures mixtures tension mixtures night train (night train tags leaf tracings and light green nocturnes) Leaves cluster night train wheels and vertical telegram wire (I work fly-by-wire wheel clusters clusters creep rib cage constellations)

The leaves of the rose cluster where I wire textures (textures flirt night train present tense) Present tense looks leaves the very pulse of the machine / machines cluster thirteen leaf maximums I look at the lake water maximums and lake murmurs wire water light fragments

I flutter through leaf fragments and light fragments. Fragments flood an elephant light over the rose. Rose clusters flush to fragments and I fit the fragments present tense. I fit the fragments fidget and fractal, and the fragment fractals face Christina mourning and gog and magog. Fragments only transition to other fragments, an endless night train. It must always be night, otherwise they wouldn’t need the lights.

The leaves of the rose cluster present tense fragments Fragments wheel wire leaf whirligig: fragments from the Yod of the whirlwind and the tempest El Shaddai (El Shaddai wires fragments a telegraph tetragrammaton) Leaves of the rose cluster god fragments gog and magog and I rearrange my guts in rose clusters I arrange the bloom of my guts in leaf fragments (wheel fragment textures tress wire tenses wheel fragment flex fly-by-wire wild word) Fragment, wire leaf whirligigs: single notes in various patterns

(Single leafs in various patterns Single fragments in various patterns)

Single leafs in various patterns cluster various patterns Fragments in various patterns vine vertical verdigris fragments in grid (I draw grids fragment in graphite and I indulge in a fragmented minimalism) Single notes in various patterns sound leaves in clusters of five, nine, and the thirteen Leaves in various patterns lure light inland: a single sustained wavering light and a single sustained wavering light Leaves look light and line look fragments

You said this about my work a bit ago, I say to Asia.

[It’s bold and provocative, a big fuck you to the church, says Asia. But it’s also a hand reaching out to the part of yourself that has been excluded and others on the margins, looking them in the eyes and saying “you belong here, come as you are.” That’s prophesy to me. You job is to speak truth and comfort to those that have been marginalized by the church…]

Do you think my writing still does this? I say. I think it’s good to check to see if it’s prophesying properly. OK, let me be clear, says Asia. Your prophesying can change and still be “proper”. I do think this element of it has shifted some and you yourself have distanced yourself from church, she says. What do you think it has shifted to? Towards you and your relationships with others, says Asia. I am curious in what ways you feel that is prophetic or the prophetic spirit, I say. Can you tell me what it means for something to do prophetic? says Asia. I feel like I have a pretty loose definition and I have to make sure we are close to the same page, she says. I think my definition is very close to an encounter William Blake has in a few of his works, I say. This is from The Marriage of Heaven and Hell where Blake meets Isaiah and Ezekiel and he asks what Isaiah what made him think that God spoke to him:

Isaiah answered: I saw no God, nor heard any, in any finite organical perception: but my senses discovered the infinite in every thing, and I was then persuaded and remained convinced: that the voice of honest indignation is the voice of God, I cared not for the consequence but wrote…

I also think of the following lines by William Blake:

A Poet a Painter a Musician an Architect: the Man or Woman who is not one of these is not a Christian You must leave Fathers and Mothers and Houses and Lands if they stand in the way of Art

OK, simplify that into a single sentence, says Asia. I don’t think prophecy can be simplified into the sentence but sure: prophecy is the storytelling that realizes and brings about the creative anarchic community of things. Some people think that’s divine or the Kingdom of God. Then why wouldn’t your writing be prophecy? says Asia. I was more curious how you thought me writing about myself and relationships fit into prophecy, I say. Does your definition differ than mine significantly? Not by much, no, says Asia. But I’ll be honest with you, even if my definition was very different, it wouldn’t matter. I don’t have a concrete idea of prophecy outside of speaking and reaching people in some way. If you say what you write is prophecy, then your idea of what is and what isn’t is more important than mine, she says. I ask you though because I trust your judgment and I think it’s important to check and reevaluate I am prophesying what is true. I do consider you an important creative collaborator of my work even if it’s indirectly, I say. I just don’t think that I can say for sure what is true and what will speak to you, says Asia. Is me writing about me and my relationships prophecy for you? I say. Yes, because you are writing what is true for you, says Asia. If it’s true for you then if you feel it’s prophecy – I write our friendship in a true way, I say. Yes, says Asia.

The leaves of the rose grow in clusters of five, nine, and thirteen leaves There is a rose and then there is a rose: I prophesy roses I prophesy the rose rhizome and multiplicities roses multidirectional I prophesy multidimensional fragments and fragments fractal present tense tensions textures (textures taryn ten thousand things)

I prophesy textures and threshold Textures tone and intone a prophetic threshold and light liminal light

I prophesy present tense textures and I tent prophetic fragments (I grapple and wrestle with the Book as prophecy, and I grapple with wrestle with myself as prophet, this Ben Adam and Ben Hinnom vision. What the book prophesies and my identity as prophet continually shifts and transforms. I continue to evaluate and reevaluate this prophecy and what it means to inhabit the prophet body and visionary body. I continue to resonate with William Blake’s visions and insights on prophecy: prophecy arrives with what might be called a Quaker Inner Light, or a ground of soul that boils over with a universal human insight. This prophecy cannot be separated from art-making, myth-making, and storytelling. My prophecy transparently struggles with what it means to prophesy and for all the better, because it cannot remain stagnant. Prophecy is process, even if it must continue in mournings, messes, masses, weddings, and fragments.)

The leaves of the rose grows in clusters of five, nine, and thirteen leaves I prophesy rose leaf and leaves of grass and single notes in various patterns Leaf and leaves wire longer a single sustained wavering light and a single sustained wavering light Irregular leaves light line rhythm up rhythm down desert (desert dances up distance down distance delicious roses)

Single notes in various patterns cluster irregular lived irregular lights (my eyes have slightly irregular shapes and my iris opens a shaped canvas)

Irregular leaves line rhythm up rhythm down chromatic desert

The desert rose rarefies in dream. Leaves distill and condense into a material leaf and a leaf maximally metaphysical. This rose of sharon speaks in holy spirit tongues, a violent pink rose prepared from pentecost. The desert rose scales chromatic desert colors and I pick up the modal leaves in scalar fragments (fragments form a pantonal Book of Sand). The coyote cells inharmonic shards of rose: for there is a rose and then there is a rose. The desert rose condenses in the coyote dream and we must walk dreaming. The rose and the coyote walk dreams, and Christina and Ben walking dreaming. The desert rose scales Kindred in chromatic pink and saturated raw red. (When I put a green, it is not grass. When I put a blue, it is not sky).

The leaves of the rose grows in clusters of five, nine, and thirteen, and I have a vision of nine and thirteen I have the thirteenth Christina vision, and she emerges from the desert rose rock river fragments (For the rose reveals rebirth There is a rose and then there is a rose red rebirths I have a vision of Christina’s corpse as Tiamat: and the Lord stood upon Tiamat’s (Christina’s) hinder parts and with his merciless club he smashed her skull He cut through the channels of her blood, and he made the North wind bear it away into secret places (Jesus prays in the desolate place, the secret place of Christina’s hollowed-out body She tents open Lake Galilee tempest / shelter from the storm mechagodzilla skull) He split her up a flat fish in two halves, one half of her stabilized as a covering of heaven… (If Christina only remains as a corpse, I will transform her corpse into a Shekinah canopy; I will tan her skin for the Book anthropodermic bibliopegy. I do not know if I survive without Christina, but if I do, like Marduk, I will fashion creation recreation of Book and recreation of ben adam, my soul and body Ben Book Adam Kadmon. I don’t know if I survive Christina what Christina when Christina hollow earth – first wedding night first mourning night. Now night, Christina Babylon gores my body agharta).

The leaves of the rose grows in clusters of five, nine, and thirteen leaves

I Have Also The Bible Of Hell

This secret appears in the Book of Adam. When darkness aroused, it aroused intensely, thereby creating Hell, clinging to that conflict. At the seething fury subsides, a conflict of a different type arose: a conflict of love.

I repeat the Book and I repeat the secrets of the Book I repeat the excessive secrets of the Book ben hinnom harsh noise ben adam Book braid Book bell basketweave her repetition: Christina a couple down the road from the book bunnies kitchen kits kiss come in my kitchen Book repeats book street Christina sun eclipse: Christina clip can you do something don’t mad

Christina Book cling hell cleaver and Christina claw hell cats (Frightmare! Born of jangle witchcraft! Created by a curse! FROM HELL TO CAME)

I discover the Book for the first time many times: I discover her Book, Christina’s Book, many times for the first time. I discover her Book one desert many deserts and her circular ruins reveal a new story and a new narrative each time every time. I sometimes love discovery and rediscovering this desert, and other times I feel overwhelmed and overcome by her desert: I have no choice though but to repeatedly traverse the desert. I traverse her desert like the Israelites after the Exodus, and I search for the Christina Shekinah also in exile. Her spirits appears to me in erratic and unpredictable outbursts – I have not detected her gamma ray bursts in a long time, and I find alone in my exile. I keep exploring and keep documenting her seemingly empty desert.

Art Chad says: The only way to make art that matters is to not kill yourself. You can’t make stuff when you're dead so you have to make as much things as possible while you’re alive… I make art and I make as much art as possible: I write as much as possible and I write to survive I write many volumes of the secret Book of Adam and the enfolded Apocryphon of John and in my documentation of these many Books. I realize they all speak in the shadow of Christina (I write Christina – I always write Christina – I never not write Christina. If I copy from the Hebrew Bible, it only means Christina; if I copy from the Nag Hammadi Codex, it only prophesies Christina; if I copy from the Zohar, its sages and rabbis and assemblies only describe the Face of Christina and the Throne of Christina forever and ever. The Book writes Christina before I was born and the Book will continue writing Christina until I die and beyond my death. Christina I miss you. Christina I miss you; you are the one who writes and the one who is written. This secret appears in the Book of Adam and Christina prophesies Adam into Ben Adam and the secret splits alternate alternatives avalanches anarchies. I write Christina as much as possible to survive)

I make art I make as much art as possible and I write to survive I write and copy the ossified memory of regionalizing and segmenting spine I make to forget I miss Christina and how I don't know if I can survive in Christina’s absence (I will survive Christina’s absence because her empty tomb still prophesies Her empty tomb continues to write longer and longer endings to the gospel of mark She continues to add secrets to the Book of Adam I obscure her absence through her creation and I obscure her absence through chaos / her holy ghost cuts interrupts cuts chaos tehom

This secret appears in the Book of Adam. When darkness aroused, it aroused intensely, thereby creating Hell… I tell you, no virtue can exist without breaking these ten commandments; Jesus was all virtue and acted from impulse, not from rules… I have also the Bible of Hell, which the world shall have whether they will it or no.

Decalogue disintegrates in her desert: written word melts in her wilderness Written word flows whirlwind fluid through and to human flesh and flesh flings word wild Her flesh slings swing malleable word and microtonal word, and her words whips wicks fire fires

Christina loosens decalogue din detour dog star: dog star slings or swings dark deep desert Dark deep locusts drink desert destroyer / destroyed decalogue dog star I detour decalogue dark dart desert desert

Christina loosens decalogue destruction destruction / dive decalogue destruction wilderness Christina drums a desert delirium deletes decalogue decalogue again dense (to attain the multiple, one must have a method that effectively constructs it) (Christina constructs the multiple through the delirious repetition of desert deconstruction)

Christina loosens the decalogue dress undress mess desert diamond tonality Christina loosens desert miamas magma malleable mutiny Miasma assists mistress stressed human neat marionette mattress

You told me once that you can't separate the Book from yourself, and I’ll be honest with you, I thought you were deflecting when you said that, says Asia, but I’ve thought about it some more and now I agree with you. You are constantly being created and recreated by the relationships you have with others and that’s what your Book is about, and when others read it, they experience that too. We are all in symbiotic relationship with each other, says Asia.

I make art I make as much art as possible and I rework and repeat the arc of the art Art repeats the multiplicity and intersections of myself and my relationships with others I do not obscure Christina’s absence through creation but rather grapple with its unknown abyss, its double knot aporia knotting her absence: her absence cannot be resolved but only traced and retraced, written and rewritten and repeated I create and do not obscure but grapple the rhizomic god of Christina: the utterly human Eloi Eloi Lema Sabacthani cannot be extinguished even through impossible resurrections I create and leave the creation radically known and radically open I create into the promise of the messianic and parousia…

(How strange: her voice, which I know well, and which is said to be the very texture of memory (“the dear inflection”), I no longer hear. Like a localized deafness) (From Mourning Diary by Roland Barthes) Christina’s voice vowels no god but generous graphomania No god or Christina but graphomania gap my massive spine outstrips my spine My massive millipede spine outstrips my spine spoon spelt split fields: field graphomania mines mitral mallet quartet mercury No god no outlet but this exposed ben hinnom optic nerve: nervous annihilation no god no Christina but anarchic creation Create the ossified memory of the regionality and segmenting spine spool thread tenor saxophone improvisation No god no outlet wax wayward word work: waves vowel train whistle

(The only way to make art that matters is not kill yourself) I contemplate killing myself and I look towards death: death details desert word dire wolf segmented spine awake Awake, Christina segments my spine and revel in the word spool I speak spool how strange her voice Strange her voice the texture of time Her voice spools time times half a time waxwork what ocean mash work whittle

You said I prophesy the marginal and liminal and the prophecy opens up spirituality and break down hierarchies, I try to Asia. What does the Book prophesy to you on a personal level? What prophetic truth do you take to heart and learn from the Book and me? I say. I’m not sure, says Asia. Not saying that it doesn't speak to me but it’s not something I’m sure I could identify at the moment or translate the words… In a simple interpretation of your prophecy, you prophesy me and the positive effects I have and how I’ve grown. And you prophesy how you have grown and you prophesy our friendship, says Asia.

This secret appears in the Book of Adam… I have also the Bible of Hell, which the world shall have whether they will it or no. One Law for the Lion and Ox is oppression.

Christina disintegrates decalogue in desert: Christina disintegrates decalogue into the multitude of deserts multidirectional Christina disintegrates decalogue developing variations and the desert music attacks detached distance Desert music develops disintegrations long legato logos and rich sea of reeds rubato rhizome

Christina disintegrates my logos and languages I dialogue diagonal raindreaming Diagonal rain dreaming drone desktop tabernacle / tent descent Disintegrations descent decline develop I disintegrate decline repeats developments detached desert Desert attacks detached my languages lego and I detach dark decline descent Descent decline develop durable desert then dubious desert (I depend suspicion dubious desert)

Christina disintegrates my decalogue language into desert jazz dolphin dance Desert jazz djent dubious onomatopoeia (I always remember Christina as the darling of the desert)

I too disintegrate and descend into desert. I descend the desert into a dialectical development: desert both directions at once. I develop desert both directions at once, which is the simultaneous disintegration and repetition of the desert. Thus I develop the desert dark descent and desert deepening desert. I share this desert with Christina’s disintegration of the desert. I attempt to remember the desert as desert and remain in an eternal desert, but Christina ghosts stir up the desert into abyss and chaos, and I must once again create (recreate) our desert. This is my sisyphean task, the making and remaking of our desert.

Descend desert decline and document disintegrates desert Descent desert dark photographic developer Develop desert darlings: develop desert darling Christina dunes army monoliths Desert develops Taryn Trickster and Taryn Turntablist Desert scratches screech owl long desert lilith (A DJ vinyl turntable system, consisting of two turntables and a crossfader equipped DJ mixer) Desert develops Taryn Trickster and Taryn Turntablist, and Taryn Tetragrammaton disintegrates direct-drive turntables cutting the backspin double back Taryn Tetragrammaton types desert turntables tallman sonic artifacts

I tell you, no virtue can exist without breaking these ten commandments. Jesus was all virtue and acted from impulse, not from rules. I often read the Bible in its infernal or diabolical sense which the world shall have if they behave well.

I act from impulse and my languages prophesy disintegration of the desert My languages pulse and play a thousand plateaus I act from impulse immediate metric modulation / disintegration developing variations

I act from impulse no mediation but amplitude modulation machine mercenary I act from impulse party startle reflex fast fourier transform flow Flow floor fungus network fingers desert fire fringes back-and-forth no slack Christina holy spirit I act from impulse desert disintegrations drive drive deconstruction Desert drain drag disintegration din decline deserts: all I know are assemblages All I know are assemblages awl anvil artichoke antiassemblage wildernesses Assemble desert assemblages / assemble wilderness wild assemblages

Perhaps I only write assemblages: I only make assemblages. Even Christina consists of assemblages, fragments of memory, pieces of conversation I collage and bricoleur (If so, the same can be said of me writing Asia and my friendship with Asia as well). I do not think I am antiassemblages but it feels disconcerting that all I make is so reducible, so moved to such an easy foundation or simplification. I suppose though that assemblage itself anticipates an anarchic multiplicities and beauties exist in the arrangements of the multiplicities. Assemblages all the way down, I think, and prophecy after all is a movement from reception to interpretation within the prophet itself: by arranging these assemblages, in interpreting their prophetic content, I am reading the Bible in its infernal and diabolical sense.

An old conversation with Asia when God provided me with prophecy:

God destroys me often, I say. Bruh, your relationship with god makes me uncomfortable sometimes, says Asia. Sorry. You don’t have to apologize, it’s just that you actively seek god while also constantly saying that god destroys you and tears you apart. Do you want to be torn apart? I’m trying to understand the appeal, says Asia. When Philip K. Dick encountered God, he said “God injured me”, I say. God was simultaneously healer and destroyer for him. He said (taking a line from the opera Parsifal): “The wound can only be healed by the spear that made it.” God is the spear that wounds and heals simultaneously, I say. That makes sense, says Asia, but I hardly ever hear you talk about being healed. Philip K. Dick also rarely talked about being healed, I say. He said God injured him and refused to heal him yet he was the only source of the healing. That sounds toxic, says Asia. Yes, toxic Christianity, I say. When the heathens and pagans talk about latent Christianity as toxic suffering, that’s what I am, say.

I conjecture my experiences with the God of Christianity influenced my own toxicity and difficulty in my relationships: God treated me this way and that might have been partial unconscious motivation on why I had difficulty forming healthy bonds and also inflicted suffering on my friends. It took the absence of God to finally help me build healthier relationships with others.

Five Sturdy Leaves Surround The Rose

I raise up the cup of salvation: sieve substance salve somewhere human skeleton scientist Salve signs gospel her snow shortfall and salve symposium Salve signs shake calve halves glacier salvation I raise the cup spell gospel sphere and I raise gospel graph god languages

I raise the cup of salvation: her sieve serpent swings team second serpent Her sieve serpent slides hide gospel secret second gospels spare serpent Second serpent salve calve Christina halves god glacier pressure flake serpents I up cup serpent hermeneutics I up cup clowns captive trickster Taryn up last supper Cup up trickster Taryn up porn clusters (it’s tight jams and loose morals at the wildest whorehouse in the west! CATHOUSE COWGIRLS)

I count the cup as a chair: I count the cup as a chair and a chain. I count cups and I drink the cup as a hollowed cross. I drink the cup as a barren body and her body pours blood bursts into my mouth. Mouth machines matchlock moths months gunpowder and the month fires cup bullets of condensed blood. I count the cup corpus hypercubus and Christina stands at the foot of the cross and hangs nailed crucified to the cross hypercube. Cup pours into cup hypercube and klein bottle and mouth distorts intersecting dimensions. I count the cup dimensions of desert distance dimensions.

I raise the cup of salvation and cup sheds Christina antlers saddle point Raise the cup cusp cut punk salvation and Christina stripteases calve halve human skeletons Cain rose up I raise the cup gospel of mark mark of cain: cain claims chain and wolf bridal chamber Bridal chamber chews revolver chamber rhizome russian roulette and narrative ripens multidirectional

Salvation slices sieve Salvation slice sieve heaven halves slice sieve Christina shares sieve slice signs gospel

I sight salvation sheets of sound. Sound stabs with tuttis and gruppetti, and divergent groups of gospels network narratives. I sight many narratives and gospel experiments experiments prophetic sound. I sound prophecy and I prophesy experiment gospel and experiment salvation. Salvation with sight laces lattice double blood and black lace: narrative bodies and mythic bodies fully participating in sounds slide silences liminal musics. I sight salvation sheets of sound.

I think part of the myth of the Book is the act of tearing apart the myths that made us and recreating them, says Asia. Yes, I say. The Book tears apart hierarchies, exclusivity, othering people, violence… And it takes the myths of the Bible and subverts them and recreates them into anarchy and inclusivity, I say.

Salvation sheets of sound clusters terror Taryn irreversible trace (Taryn terror trine trace taste last supper Taryn climb trine time counterpoint pocket: pickpocket augmented Taryn triads) (Triad terror sticks three Taryn tree bodies Taryn terror and awe reconstructs the Pythagorean cosmos according to the plane of the octave)

I raise the cup of salvation and five sturdy leaves surround the rose: these five leaves salvation These five leaves sight weight her salvation: shape her shape sheets of sound Five sturdy leaves sight light height harsh horror expressed harsh noise (I experiment leaf noise I experiment shelf noise) (I raise the cup of salvation and shelf noise wail distortion body undifferentiated desert) (I raise the cup of salvation and a surface of stratification is a more compact plane of consistency lying between two layers)

Five sturdy leaves lies between two layers and they line pairs wolf pack snow / secret gospel avalanche

Five sturdy leaves surround the rose and I raise up cain a gospel towards the fields

I like the new direction, says Asia. I think it’s a smoother read when you mix up the mediums a bit like you have. I’ll be on the lookout for more anarchist narrative for you. I think narrative does a beautiful job of building symbolism through imagery that’s hard to get with other forms of writing. I think people think of narrative and poetry and figurative language as separate things and that does everyone a disservice. Narrative can set the stage, add context and depth to it, bring it to life. A metaphor can say “it is” but turn it into a narrative and you can show us. This isn't really can example of anarchic narrative but an example of an in-depth metaphor in a narrative: there is this book that really stuck with me called H Is For Hawk, where a woman who is grieving the death of her father gets a hawk and tames it. Part of the hawk taming process is to seclude yourself with the hawk. So she isolates herself, just her and this giant bird of prey. As the hawk becomes more tame, she becomes more feral and there is something powerful about the imagery because she could have just waxed poetic about the sadness and weariness of grief and she turned it into something wild – untamed – animal – something that changes us. And she was just didn’t tell us, she shows us exactly what it can looks like, says Asia.

I raise the cup of salvation as new myth and five study leaves surround the rose new narrative. I always know rose as rosary, and rosary reveals sea of reeds reveals ark of the covenant. Rose and rosary ring exile and exodus cup earth ground salvation. I walk the ground narrative and I rinse in the river myth. Narrative speaks into the rose salvation and the leaves make good eating. I eat leaves light and life and I walk on sea of galilee ground myth.

Five sturdy leaves surround the rose: these five called salvation These five salvation name the gate five gates

Leaves name the leaves five leaves: gates name the gates five gates. My five fingers grasp five gates and I open the hinge hinge Alice’s Adventures Underground. I pass through five simultaneous gates with absurd same and romantic chess tactics. Names transform with numbers: Christina names me multiple bens between pairs of strata. The repetition of names repeat difference onto numbers: Ben Gate calls Ben Five Gates and gates open radical rose. Five gates open mystical five roses rhizomes.

Five gates graffiti gruppen ben flesh the mechanical roughness of the surface Five gates grapple ben body gardener blue pomegranate: pearl pomegranate plays actual substance through which the picture is made

I paint pomegranate pictures: I paint pictures projected through five gates I improvise ink impasto incarnation sharp chiaroscuro cross Cross scratches and carves pigments

I paint pomegranate pictures accent pink pigments I paint isolated pink and my feral flesh flank hawk flirt animal Pink all animal and all gates gate five gates chiaroscuro I see one drop of crocodile meditating I see different death dark dream dream down crocodile teeth Crocodile accuse death accents ben skin stretch cut staccato (funk sting staccato stations of the cross) I see the kiss of my shadow sex crocodile crown chasm I kiss schism ben skin shadow five gates alligator but the pink crocodile shreds workshed among scissors / my eyes slice rectangular salamanders A drip of cross lizard leers into my eye dandelions

I eye crocodile the chair of the cross. I carry the cross covered in crocodile skin. I wear the cross and a covert boot or batman utility belt. I eye a drop of crocodile extends the cross judas seat and iron maiden. No one expects the inquisition. I carry the cross as a child of humanity: I carry the cross recorded onto a cassette tape. I record the cross onto magnetic tape and it reads boombox wocket in my pocket. I kiss the cross crocodile Christina and she chews my hand clean captain hook.

A drop cross lizard leers into my eye dandelions Dandelions press pomegranates and their pigment blossoms five sturdy leaves Dandelion pomegranate gleans coast grasswork work cross crocodile wheel Pigment ply pigment canvas twisted damascus / crushed dandelion A pale pigment palm death pig destroyer / Taryn Trickster terrorizer

I would like to write some narratives about you being different insects or different legendary creatures, I say. I’m down with that, says Asia. Do you have any insects or creatures you want me to write you as? No, I want you to decide, says Asia. You borrow heavily from other sources and that’s good, and you do good work with the things you collect, but something tells that you could do a little more to draw from the inner wells of Ben and that has been neglected some. I think this narrative experiment is drawing it out of you a bit though, she says. That’s an interesting point and I think you’re right, I say. You want to draw from the inner wells of ben in writing you? In writing in general, says Asia. I always worry about writing you incorrectly or in a way that doesn't represent you, so I check with you a lot… I will draw from the inner wells of ben on writing in general and in writing our friendship too. I will still check with you on ideas to make sure you’re OK with it and give you feedback I say. That's fine with me, says Asia.

Dandelion drips dross dandelion Christina: dandelion drips crocodile Christina rope roses I weave dandelions into my hair and my braids blossom crucified blonde Christina. I wear Christina a dandelion bow in a messy bun and her crucifixion drips cup blood stains my skull. I wear her worship bright red, the cutting tooth of lions. The lion mane merges with the membrane of my scalp and my eyes direct miniature crucifixions: dandelion dollhouse crucifixions.

I crush dandelions to make color butter pigment and I scatter lion leaves crucifixions (to wonder why a given work, a given brushstroke, appears in one canvas and not the other) (Why one particular text appears on one page and not the other / Because I encounter one text one this page and another text on another page; however I try to write a total heterogeneous text sprawled like the inflation of the universe, so I may disrupt my sense of chronological time: to let the CHRONOS cut cave mouth khora a prophetic time and time medium conversing with other time animals and spirits)

To produce five sturdy leaves surrounding the rose. These five called salvation, they the five gates. Concerning this mystery, it is written: I raise up the cup of salvation (I lift up the cup of salvation and call on the name YHVH; I will pay my vows to YHVH in the presence of all his people; precious in the sight of YHVH, the death of his faithful ones) (My death bulldozes god dreaming My death dissolves all intervals on the continuum, a claptrap death monody and monorhythm / the principle of variation provides the unifying factor)

My death deserts my death / death possibly a boat My body boats death blood vapor and bone vapor Black bone vapor death dream or something masked as a dream Dream duplicated desert cup: chariot chalice stations of the cross Chariot chalice cupped crucifixion or common crucified copy

(I was talking to Christina yesterday and got on the topic of Kendrick Lamar’s To Pimp A Butterfly. Have you heard the record?… I listened to it again afterward and I felt like I am never going to be able to create writing as great as that record. I felt very discouraged. That's when I wrote you the prophecy stuff: “I hope I create. I hope I pray something radically flat and radically open…” because I felt creatively inadequate. I feel I can’t prophesy to the extent I need to, I say. Why would listening to an album make you feel like you can’t create? says Asia. You aren’t Kendrick Lamar. You aren’t making albums. You are Ben and you create as Ben. You will never be Kendrick and Kendrick will never be Ben and that’s OK, she says. I know, but I feel the way the themes and techniques used in that album – the creative techniques – outstrip what I can do with my creative techniques. I’m not doing enough creatively. I have to put in more work. Even then it might not be enough. No, stop thinking like that, says Asia. It’s not about more work – stop using this as an opportunity to punish yourself. Find the direction you want to go in, what you want to get across and then shift your technique accordingly, she says.)

(I move in both directions at once / I machine multidirectional multiplicities I work myth, narrative, and vision into the kingdom of KRYSXTRYN + Asia Among Aphids I work anarchic creative flat open Asia participates and helps me discover this anarchic multidirectional)

(Talking about To Pimp A Butterfly really depressed me, I say. It made me feel like I’m never going to make work that great. Oh, I see, says Christina. It’s a great piece of work. Lots of people make great pieces of work though. Except me, I say. Why do you discount yourself? What changed when you see someone else’s work? I can’t make something as great. I recognize a greatness I don’t recognize in myself. What do you think he thought as he was struggling writing the album? says C. How many times did he almost trash the whole thing? How much was left on the cutting room floor? Says Christina.)

To produce five sturdy leaves surrounding the rose. These five are called salvation; they are five gates. Concerning this mystery it is written: I raise up the cup of salvation. This is the cup of blessing, which should rest on five fingers – and mo more – like the rose, sitting on five sturdy leaves, paradigm of five fingers. This rose is the cup of blessing.

Rose shows slow rose Rose snows slow rose (longitudinal section through a developing rose hip) Rose snows most rose rhizome (a new rhizome forms in the heart of the tree, the hollows of a rose, the crook of a branch) Rose saws snow sleep: snow word show languages lamp lights lights lips Rose bows black body lagoon legume leg room (rose show windows rose snow kingdoms)

Her rose exposes shadows. I stay shade suicides. Her rose reveals neon fun from rear strawberries but I dwell dark lack luck suicides. I never die. I die many times but her rose revives me I go ghosts. Her rose resurrects surreal sex again suicides. I never die. I die many bens and many bodies burst red balloon pop goes the weasel bodies. I desire death. I drive death towards her desert and dandelions, and blessed the lion that eats the human one and the lion lives human. The lion lure anglerfish light and I strive a romantic suicide but her rose remembers me. I realize her rose as a raw meat resurrection of Christ: rose exposes bone, rose exposed tendon. A saber-toothed Taryn chomps ben bone feldspar and machine dream mica. She spits out my eye, and my eye planted in earth extracts or transmutates rose and roses. I remember her rose and my many resurrections.

A drop cross lizard leers into my eye dandelions / lions lick my eyes new-formed roses I rest on rose and I caress Christina crocodile crooked syntax Crook syntax crystal scale scale mail Snail mail scale syntax sled crystal crocodiles Syntax kiss Christina dirt of shadows shadow widow wire wedding I caress Christina crocodile my kiss strays strange weddings I wed crocodile Christina catchweight kisses kiss contact improvisation Charge crocodile change crypt strip syntax Charge crocodile classical keystone critical hit (I sift through sculpture tongue cannon) (I sift strange strawberry ball bearings and I roll bas relief and comic relief) (Syntax rolls roll gain special effects affects step hex steppe syntax axe) Crocodile bit death cap sap colored planes constituted only through reflections and mirrorings

I return to her rose. I return to her rose rhizome and circular ruins, but the rose repeats pure repetition. Rose repeats distilled water watch word. I return to her rose sheol and ben hinnom: my grave which shares the grave of god. I remember her rose circular ruins and circular saw and her rose cuts my body half halves halves body variations of zeno’s paradox.

Crocodile Christina bites death cap gap sap displaces through reflections and mirrorings Reflections mirror crucifixions / keep the clay close choir cobwebs (And to kiss your pure thighs Raw rose Krystal sediment of the sun)

I dream her rose: her rose diverges multidirectional rhizome My death dreams different PKDs

I dream her rose: her rose runs desert dandelion multidirectional. I dream Philip K. Dick and my dreams meet his dreams My hypnagogic voice meets his hypnagogic voice and Christina sisters us both. I write this Exegesis (What is this book but another variation of the Exegesis of Philip K. Dick? What is this Book but a flipped Bible and a negative Zohar? Subversion is the very movement of writing: the movement is death). My death dreams different Philip K. Dicks and I live some lives of PKD. I contain the soul sparks of PKD and Sabbatai Sevi.

I dream this cup of blessing which rests on five fingers and no more – like her rose, sitting on five sturdy leaves Her rose canons cup of blessing

I Tell Myth Ghosts And Myth Fragments

I go ghosts or ghastly grinner Grin ghosts gothic romance string stone go slow motion Motion ghosts mimed media cinema / ghosts paint tape print pink spirit Speak soft ghosts slush film I go ghosts or ghastly grinner grand guinol

I go ghosts do happens desert Go ghosts gout old english alliterative verse / beowulf body without organs Ghosts surface ben body stone / a surface of stratification is a more compact plane of consistency lying between two layers Ghosts surface watercolour washing machine / machine ghosts gashes gnashing of teeth I gnash teeth ghosts constant surfaces swerve outer darkness

I gash dark and gnash dark familiar Christian ghosts

Gash dark gush blood rush ration rhizome: rhizome dark constant insistent surfaces

Ghost stories and urban legends fascinate me: they sometimes frighten me wonderfully. I’ve never told stories around the campfire but I dream myself around the campfire and I mimic jump stories from the collection Scary Stories To Tell In the Dark. Ghost stories pervade waking life and dreaming life and I wake to sleep and take my waking slow. I wake to sleep ghosts inside and ghosts outside, and every ghost speaks stories. I know and tell stories, myth ghosts, and ghost fragments.

I would like to talk about mythology, says Asia. The myths that are a part of religions and how they shape worldviews. Many of the stories in the Bible are treated like and function as mythology. I’m going to be mostly talking about the creation story. God makes the earth, the animals, the plants, the sky, then makes Adam. Adam gets lonely, God makes Eve, God tells the humans not to eat from the Tree of Knowledge, the serpent tricks Eve and God banishes Adam and Eve and curses them. This myth shaped the way Christian societies viewed the world and women. Yesterday, I started reading a book called Braiding Sweet Grass and it starts off with the native origin myth. Sky Woman grabbed fruits and seeds from the tree of life as she was falling. She fell to the earth, was rescued by geese, other animals came to her aide, pulling mud from the bottom of the water and putting it on the turtle’s back. Sky Woman dances with joy and her joy multiplied the dirt. She planted the fruit and seeds that she carried with her and she consecrated the earth with other living things. I had to put the book down and grieve the impact of the mythology that raised me. All of the guilt and shame. Being told that I was inherently gullible and naive because I was a woman and Eve was tricked. Told that we should have dominion over the living things around us. The stories we tell are powerful. They literally shape the world around us… How do you reconcile this? What does a nonviolent Christianity do about violent myths? says Asia. I was thinking of several texts from the Nag Hammadi Codex that reinterprets the Genesis myths, I say. In the Apocryphon of John, The Nature of the Rulers, and a couple others, the Woman shows the Man his true nature and gnosis. The serpent is either Zoe, a woman, or Jesus himself. The myths of the Bible are myths of human nature and human history. Its violence is human violence, not Christ. It reveals ourselves at our worst, I say. Funny how they seem to give god the same nature in those early myths, says Asia. I kind of have a theory that those myths are created by and perpetuated by man’s self-hatred. I think there is something about Christianity that is very open to preconceived negative thought patterns. I don’t think Christianity was intentionally designed to be oppressive, I think it was shaped that way by our hatred for ourselves. My brain was like “hmm yes, I am inherently unworthy of love” and turned that into my own personal gospel. You can’t convince me that the dogma of “humans are inherently evil” was created by a people that didn’t hate themselves. Because that means that they believe they were born evil and sinful too, says Asia. I’m experiencing that now, I say. You know I struggle with my value. It’s very possible that has roots in me growing up in a fundamentalist church, I say. I think it’s a bit of an ouroboros situation or a “What came first? The chicken or the egg?” situation, says Asia. Like a feedback loop, I say. Exactly. How did you break out of it? There are probably multiple ways to do it but I took a step back and started untangling things, says Asia. I eventually realized that the feelings of being unworthy were older than when I started going to church. Then worked to untangle that from the religious beliefs that reinforced it. But the problem still remains that there are core beliefs and teachings in contemporary Christianity that can be dangerous for people already in those kind of feedback loops and encourage them. I don’t really know how to reconcile that. You would have to change those beliefs and myths entirely, says Asia.

I go ghosts or ghastly grinner stones and myths I make myths ghost mineral mingled matrix myth inclusion Myth occludes and includes ghost incisors

I go ghosts mythopoetic language and bard body without organs I bard archaic human throne ancient of ancients

Go ghosts game myth grow body mechanical Ghosts go gave glow gold myth body mathematics (holy ghost determines a Christ calculus) (holy spirit solves church systems of differential equations) Go ghosts go gala genealogies / holy spirit compact surface to surface Ghosts surface urban decay / desert surface and stratification Gall ghosts jump go sprawl dead mall body mechanical / Christ in the claw machine

It might be a thematic idea or a purely structural idea with its main pivots: a big time span, with departure and arrival points but you don’t know what’s between them, says Peter Maxwell Davies

I depart ghosts and I arrive ghosts I depart ghosts desert destruction and I arrive ghosts spectres of marx Ghosts point punctuates aporia or punch pornography (Ghosts too flap phallus pornographic I create my mates out of my members and members machine god body nude I machine member membrane m-theory branes / multiverse plow phallus Multiverse ox phallus phylum needle nose pliers Multiverse phallus tool steel field flesh for habitation / wooden crate word Christina in nameless territory Nameless territory phallic wavelength / secrets of mammets your straight spurt)

I go pornographic ghosts (she was not only good for her patients… she was good to them NURSE CAROLYN An intimate peek into the extracurricular duties of a very private nurse)

I go private pornographies graph nude ghosts (men – and women – tried to give Candy the love she craved, but somehow it was never enough INSATIABLE)

I depart ghosts and I arrive ghosts: a spirit cunt and a spirit phallus Ghosts depart and arrive exotic earth, nude occlusions that strive to seize whatever they realm

I depart ghosts to the always-erotic desert. Ghosts swarm over and across the desert, each spirit a story. I nomad desert nameless territory and ghosts tell me their stories. I tell stories and to prophesy means to tell stories and knit net narratives. I build a campfire in the night of desert, and ghosts gather to send and receive stories. Stories change and exchange earth into earth.

Ghosts theater themes and idee fixes I inhabit many idee fixes including the ghost-rampant desert, ghost-rampant Christianities and ghost-rampant women Taryn teeming with ghosts task theme theater and field fire idee fixe

Anthony Braxton gathers his ghost trance music ensemble, turns over the hour long hourglass, and the performance goes

I too improvise ghosts I go ghost performance, the passion plays and soap opera passions of the desert theater I improvise ghost departure accelerating and decelerating I improvise ghost gore arrival (no one is safe… from this deadly vampire!! A ravishing psycho-fiend with the diabolical power to turn into a giant deathshead moth who feasts on the blood her lovers before clawing them to death! In frenzied color THE VAMPIRE-BEAST CRAVES BLOOD) I improvise ghost gore transparent blood transparent banishing circle Circle bloody ghosts cloak desert guts god ensemble Her ensemble surrounds human corpses animate acceleration and deceleration

I improvise Book ghosts primeval giants (subversion is the very movement of writing: the very movement of death)

More death: play compact heart attack Play compact heart attack / libertine fuck infarction (a more compact plane of consistency lying between two layers) Play compact ghosts I’m just walking around your city is a wonder town Play needlenose plier repetition / phallus phylum needle nose pliers porno experiments Play pries ghost pli selon pli plane visions and ghost Cleopatra the Physician visits video valley Cleopatra the Alchemist seizes my brain blood alembic / compact heart attack chrysopoeia (compact plane of consistent chryspoeia lying between layers)

Subversion is the very movement of writing: the movement of death Writing inverts serpents inverted serpents Invert ghostlike like seep serpentcoach Ghostlike line seat serpentcoach Ghostlike seat sent serpentcoach cryptogram graph girl giants Seep invert spirit serpentcoach granite glyph sacrifice of young girls / girls granite graphite glow goal Invert serpent coal climb abyss / bay of blood bottomless pit

I birth blood and ghosts birth blood bird lawnmower. I work the blood methodically and patiently. I birth bloody writing a patient spider crawling. I birth blood book ghost book and the blood of dead drive ride writing. I notice the books and the bloods overlap. The organs of the Book overlap and intersect Asia serpent insects. I invert insects and mothlights lurk campfires. I copy the campfire and I birth bloody campfire. I copy caravans and creations.

I copy campfire caravans campfire crab canons campfire creations I copy inverted creation canals and chaos terrain

I copy serpentcoach scripture I copy ghost scripture written rhizome (the written page an unknown mirror: to write confronts an unknown face) (my face remains unknown to my face) (my face reminds my face unknown) (my face arrives ghost writing and spirit pages automatic apocalypse)

Are there myths you find useful now? I say. Stories you tell, live, and remember. I’m not sure, but I should probably start being more intentional about collecting them, says Asia.

I collect myths and stories and the Book only consists of found myths, sometimes serpent-inverted I steep street stretch music serpentcoach kabbalist I graffiti lurianic kabbalah strides stripe serpent logia (I record various serpent logia: He who is near me is near the fire, and he who is far from me is far from the kingdom) I write additional rope rope rhizome flying serpents rhizome rope poke serpents smoke celluloid snake kiss I keep the sabbath with her serpents

The Book I am writing is a myth I am creating for myself, I say. You are part of that myth. You participate in helping me create stories I tell about myself and we tell about our friendship. The unconditional care we have for each other and are pursuing, our respective creativities that diverge and combine: that’s the myths you were talking about, to break out of the violence to self and the violence of the world, I say. Myth making is the most sacred things someone can do, says Asia. I think that's true, I say. Do you remember when I said that our friendship does god activity? I think myth-making is also god-activity, I say.

I keep the sabbath with her serpents and serpents kiss and invert myth I keep the Sabbath with Ghost Christina and Ghost Christianity and I prophesy to their coptic crypt Serpents saturate the crypt Serpents slow crypt cloud of unknowing / I know her name unknown via negativa Via negativa varies ghost vision desert up the black ray memory Her serpents sleeve memory selves sleeves stop-motion median paint mixtures Serpent stray ray myth modulations

I steep myth stretch music: I sleep myth serpentcoach kabbalists

To produce five sturdy leaves surrounding the rose. These five called salvation: they are the five gates. Concerning this mystery it is written: I raise the cup of salvation. This is the cup of salvation, which should rest on five fingers – and no more – like a rose sitting on five sturdy leaves, paradigm of five fingers. This is the cup of blessing.

Whenever I feel slightly egotistical about my creative work, this Book and Myth, I read the Zohar and become quickly humbled. Moses De Leon (and the precursors he built off of and the kabbalists who followed and expanded upon the Zohar) wrote the desert dense beauty body without organs. I aspire to write this undifferentiated desert myth, this infinite machine-assemble myth and myths. The Zohar continually reveals grandleon revelation and grand guinol ghost gore, and I copy its monstrous grotesque. I copy its prophetic and punch talon theater revelation, and its hermeneutic and hermetic flame never diminishes.

I raise the cup of salvation: sieve large human skeletons Serpent savle calve halves glacier salvation Salve sifts book of sand halves glacial horror / grotesque gods Cup clowns Taryn trickster torture porn cluster terror (Taryn terror trine counterpoint augmented aporia) (aporia terror / reconstruction of the Pythagorean cosmos according to the plane of the octave) Cup calves Taryn glacier pornographies (nightmare thrills beyond belief! The mammoth monster that terrorizes the earth! MONSTER FROM GREEN HELL Today it’s destroying Africa… Tomorrow the world! Man-eating lions! Stampeding elephants? Razor-jawed crocodiles! Screaming savages! … All powerless against the marauding unknown monster that crushes all before it!)

What myths do you think we are creating together? I say. Like what specific stories do you think we tell about each other, our friendship, and the world? Share yours first and I’ll think about mine, says Asia. The story of the Book first of all is a story of Ben and his relationships, I say. It began with his relationship with Christina, then with Taryn, and now with Asia. Specifically concerning our friendship: it is a story of recognizing harm and destruction, surviving and growing despite the difficulties and obstacles, and now our pursuit of the unconditional. Our friendship is a myth of perseverance, unconditional care, growth, and also the power of creativity. It is about overcoming previous constraints (confining religion, mental illness, emotional abuse and manipulation) and becoming healthy, loving, open, inclusive, creative. We were previously caterpillars and we underwent metamorphosis and are butterflies and moths. Our creativity is a myth of new spirituality: one without violence, without destructive gods and creeds. It is anarchic spirituality and a kingdom of the now, without hierarchy. This again is part of the unconditional, our pursuit and practice of unconditional care and agape run throughout friendship, creativity, and work on the Book, I say. I agree with the ones you listed so far, says Asia.

I Perform Stone Space

The performers sing into microphones or produce sound with oscillators

I perform stone space: show me the cornerstone the builders rejected I perform stone space: it is the cornerstone I perform cornerstone Book: several texts on geology and biology which makes the earth scream in pain I perform pain plane sing earth body without organs I perform pain plant sailing stones and earth screams body without organs death valley Earth screams body without organs yea though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I perform the plenitude of shadows and the pleroma of shadows I scream shadows / the earth died screaming while I lay dreaming of you

I perform minimal shadow microphones: I perform shadow minerals microphone cave quartz Cave quartz cups queer cornerstone (a homosexual Christ kisses a homosexual secret gospel of mark)

I cut cornerstone microphone and singing stones wail desert monoliths I cut Book cornerstone and I sample and amplify texts new place plunderphonics I place contact microphones on text cornerstones and I improvise with the desert landscape

Have you considered trying out an experimental narrative kind of style? says Asia. You just have a few compelling lines that I wish had more images attached to it and it would be nice to sit with them a little longer. I’ve seen a few books recently that have really interesting narrative styles that seem to break reality a bit, like Between Two Fires and one called Howl. Which lines would you like expanded? I say. Could you explain the experimental narrative style more? I feel disappointed: I thought you’d really like it, I say. [Asia sends several lines]. “If you don’t know where to begin, begin with the Book” “Universe book The Book that is coming, constantly coming, never ceasing” “I never die but I continue writing-witnessing the Book always coming and never ceasing” “She practices witchcraft and a satyr holds the Book with magic spells”. I liked a good bit of it: maybe I’m just not in the right head space. I found it difficult to follow all the way through. The narratives I mentioned have this chaotic almost poetic approach to telling a story. Between Two Fires doesn’t do it for the whole book but dips into it anytime anything supernatural happens and there is this scene where two angels are fighting and its the closest thing I’ve seen in words to describe heavenly world rendering activities that the human mind can’t follow, she says. [She sends the pages from the book describing the two angels] How would I apply that to a line like “If you don’t know where to begin, begin with the Book”? “If you don’t know where to begin, begin with the book. Ben creates the book. Ever day it is created and recreated. It loops and furls shoot up out of his pen and skull-like a thing that lives. It devours him as he devours it. This is flesh of my flesh and bone of my bones” or something like that: that was just what I thought of on the spot, says Asia. Like, certain images should be lingering on a bit more is all, and I think doing so would create more cohesiveness. The conversations help but I think they are doing a lot of heavy lifting and that means that a lot of your lovely imagery gets lost and tangled, she says. Thanks for reading and for your feedback, I say. No worries, says Asia. Didn’t mean to disappoint you. I hope you appreciate my critiques. It doesn't mean that I didn’t like it, she says.

In the current iteration of the Book, a distinct dialectic exists: my attempts to create a freer and freer writing without regard to comprehension or traditional literary structure, and Asia attempts to shape it, give it comprehensible form and accessibility to the reader The Book thrives on this dialectic and although a complete synthesis of both polarities remain elusive, our participation in the Book’s processes animates and gives the Book spirit We participate both directions at once and multidirectional Book, and Ben and Asia prophesies word and breath to dry bones and makes them live

I often feel depressed but even then my ego for the most part remains unreceptive to Asia’s critique; I fight her and my ego fights her I will in fact record a consternation of that very thing regarding this type of chaotic and poetic approach to narrative. However, usually after much troubled thought and after my ego has subsided, I agree with her perspective and integrate her critiques and suggestions into my writing I save the lines she wanted the Book to linger on more, and I save the pages of the Book she shares with me so I can experiment and attempt a surreal or poetic narrative in a punctuated paragraph format in contrast to my fragment-constellations

The performers sing into microphones or produce sound with oscillators / show me the stone the builders rejected it is the cornerstone

I perform stone space Asia among stone rivers I perform space species counterpoint plank ocean pain: I scream pain the earth died screaming I perform pace play from: from language to new language several constellations tangle several narratives Narratives permeate my body unformed unstable matters, and like Albert Ayler, I try to get more form in the free form I try to get speedier spindle space into the sound space and Asia participates additional sound I spin space aside and I experiment writing narrative form based on a line from the Zohar

The end of heaven is called Who. This: I thread this through this. I thread this through this: twice this and this thread thread twice twins. I thread this through this Asia as twin and Kari as twin, and they twin this in turns. I turn this to thread and I see the thread through cloud blood clots: this flows human blood stream. Self streams bloodstream a twisting thread and I read through the thread: this again and this twisting. This contorts through human body language and language contorts horla and harlot. Harlot of Babylon enters bloodstreams threaded wine and wine this: her twisting. I follow her twisting and testing from cup to cup. I drink her cup as all cups crowned and in vision, cups transforms into open book.

I sing new space I sing new space and new bloodstream: I sing space begins body specular flesh inversion I invert sing a scanner darkly and speculum that doesn’t shine I sing speculum that doesn’t sine inverted flesh ghosts Specular inverted flesh sings photograph space I photograph space blood clot clouds and human bloodstream and the space spans this phantom Phantoms python this space: through a glass darkly through a mirror dimly

I sing bloodstream space I sing we thin gin god space I space precious aporia This space twin dark precious aporia ghost new language

I sing new space microtonal microphones Vision voices through a scanner darkly and dark detuned slow microtonal vortex Vision voices microphone microwave webbed mason bodies I mason awake space weather: awake awake space speed dark-haired woman

I dream Christina as a dark-haired woman and her dream interrupts my place and space and I remain inverted in the dream I dream her as Philip K. Dick’s twin sister (Asia as twin and Kari as twin this thread) (Beyond that mind – noös – is brain: her Most of all she is my sister)

I dreamed about killing you again last night and it felt alright to me Dream dam dune tune tak tank desert Dream dan dune din tune tent dune Dune dream dream dark dune man born of woman (man born of woman is short-lived and sated with trouble) Man born of woman make awake work untwist work maximums (here or where: how to discover another language – I dream another Christina language and my words squirm sawed-off shot gun or completing the square I take my flesh in my teeth and twist taste turtle dove dune)

I dream about killing Christina in the undifferentiated desert. I dream the Christina narrative as a Christian narrative and Christina births the Christian desert. The desert becomes a city. She abandons me in desert. I dream journey between and behind desert and I hunt her hundreds hungry ghosts. I dream her desert city of ghosts. I dream the Christian killing and killing cave khora. Her desert opens khora and Korah’s rebellion and her cave mouth mangles me in visions and dreams.

Here or what: how to discover this language – her language chaos terrain narratives – and my words squirm her My words squirm sawed-off shotgun serpents or computer snake competing the square I take my flesh in my teeth and twist taste turtledove dune flesh dune teeth tark tent tool teeth flesh train

Here or where her this language and languages / this her chopped and screwed sheets of sound Sheets of sound slowed and throwed sand space / cookie cutter sharks Here her or where her tape trade trill body language / large truss traces Here where werewolf language lesser lights loop reverb bone visions

I wish the writing transformed you, I say. I wish the writing transformed myself. Why do you think writing will transform you? says Asia. Writing is something you create. Sometimes the creative process is healing, she says.

Until the day I die, I write the Book

If you don’t know where to begin, begin with the Book. I begin with Book and I begin with Ben, and the Book narrates this Ben and his relationships. I begin by writing Christina or Asia; I begin by writing Taryn or Krystal (What would happen to you if I died? I ask Krystal. There would be a void that couldn’t be filled, she says). I suffer from suicidal depression; nevertheless I begin with the Book. I continue writing the Book until the last hour I die.

I sing new space microtonal microphones Microphone feedback voices slow detuned microtonal vortex I invert vortex vine microphones microwave webbed wagon bodies I body wagon awake space: wagon waking dream space speed dark-haired woman I dream Christina the dark-haired woman and her hair hacks holes in my body skin space I dream Asia the dark-haired woman and her pixie hair pierces my skull skin scaffolding

Ben bodies oscillate ben body overtones Ben bodies oscillate ben body otonality subterranean umbra utonality Umbra under ochre dune otonal bodies oscillations / body migrations Ben body mill microtonal migrations / mill ouroboros oscillations

I appreciate your Book critique, the detail you went into answering and providing examples, I say. But I felt very egotistical, and a part of me thought, this is writing she likes better than mine? No way, I’m writing more beautiful stuff! It’s really dumb, I say. That is really dumb, says Asia. It was good writing you showed me, I say. I know you feel my worth and the worth of our friendship is not based on my writing and ability to write, but I still feel less value as a creative person because I can’t write things you love. You are always quantifying things, says Asia, putting everything in little boxes, driving yourself nuts. I did end up liking this book, but I actually struggled with this part when I first read it. Just because I used it as an example, you assumed that I loved it and hated yours, and missed the reason I sent it. I sent it because the vibes are the same. It has an anarchic spirit but it’s narrative instead of prose, she says. I’m sorry I missed your point and misinterpreted you, I say. I really want you to like my writing. I’m trying to get you to understand how incredibly small the boxes of “good and “bad” are, says Asia. You are shrinking the world around you, she says.

The performers sing into microphones or produce sound with oscillators. I perform a different kind of space that mimics videodrome hail the new flesh. I perform microphone body horror and my oscillating body opens entirely amplifier. My hands hum amplifier ground noise and I mouth microphone performance harsh noise wall. Wall noise tosses big bomb boxcar bertha into the crowd and the amplifier inverts the audience.

The performers sing into the microphone sawcut bone stone Bone bears that is the cornerstone stir this her I sign stones electromagnetic monarch butter bodies Stone slings electromagnetic most mass mash matter horizontal (large steel plates which are suspended horizontally above the floor are made to vibrate with the sounds)

This her horizontal hangman / spear-point suspensions This her horizontal wild hunt woman / spear spell spill suspensions I suspend horizontal sped: overtone series (Mozart, for example, worked and taught in a 17-note scale, identifying his scale notes through spelling e.g. C# and Db were quite differently tuned, with the first being higher)

I perform plate floor horizontal

Not To Rewrite It But To Write It

I walk watercolour eva in the cool of the day     Watercolour crest walk crest cress triceratops horns     Horn hash hush learned helplessness or no name oar name waters video nasty     Horn hash wash husk hollow horn harrowing of hell and I walk hell shallow water warning     I walk hell watercolour area rhema: rhema rhizome multidirectional wreckage     I rest in wreckage extended human body shipwreck     Ben hinnom hooks hell tines lines taryn hydra

Walk watercolour area wash smash sway walk     I swing hard walk spirit boardwalk weird beach and my brain breeches beach ballad     Walk word verb ballard body ballads taryn techne: Taryn taunts taut lilith owl who

Walk want wedding web long verb     I loot lush long verb lariat and the walk lurch lariat leads marriage of heaven and hell     Walk want wedding weld shell shield volcano: volcano verb no noun but becoming bridal chamber     I rewrite verb walk board walk beach bridal chamber and walk verb venture whale wreckage rewritten Asia among rhizomes     Asia moat mixture water multidirectional

Walk slower black widow woman monochromatic paintings / chromatic lament bass book badlands     Book badlands lash Book wetlands water colour area     Area walk vine ring wing rind rhizome multidirectional / an anarchic Asia     Anarchic Asia opens ash open nonlinear line resonance

Taryn wildcat walk who whip body: body borderless bridal chamber     Taryn taunts taut lilith owl who (Lift up your eyes on high.  To which site?  The site towards which all eyes gaze.  Which is that?  Opening of the eyes.  There you will discover that the concealed ancient one, susceptible to questioning, created these.  Who is that?  Who)

I walk who Asia among ant colonies the invisible cross cross-section     Asia among gores horns heaven and hell hawaiian ant lion or high plains grasshopper     Walk word verb who: Taryn who who Asia among high noon ants insect word salad     Asia among rivers raptor who rhizome no non ghost     Now no non ghost moon who word west languages     Her language word who who taryn twenty six stations    Her languages loft who large gas stations diffusion field god desert     Diffuse word wyrd who her waters and I awake waters walk her wheel     I awake when her walk who crows cows owl benjamin batman     I walk awake fire walk with me golden mean     Taryn wildcat walk who whip body soil silly string: lift up your eyes and see who created these     Taryn who trace orb owl ball lightning     Owl ball lightning lizard length open orb eye     I lengthen the wall wide Taryn who orb obscure orbit / to lengthen walk wide stride lizard     Who lizard scissors centipede strider spider silo it’s summertime and the living is easy silo who

Who performs warning woman who who orange slash slow slams otherworldly ocean going: who so woman grammar gravity gallery     Slow who orange glow gazette ghost garnishes and orange opalescent     Opalescent orange occludes my optics oscillation occipital bone who in the oven (no one who saw the cave with which the kitchen and prepared could have intercepted her action as anything but irrotational compulsion)     Orange glow came from three portholes pothole prototype portals / who portal phenotype and portal pavement power chords

Fuck, this is a good album, I say.  You hella made fun of me in high school for liking them, says Christina.  Did I?  I’m not surprised though.  I thought The Dillinger Escape Plan and Converge was the coolest and everything you liked was uncool.  That about sums it up, says C.  “If you don’t expect too much from me you might not be let down” was on all my social media stuff until embarrassingly late in adult life, says C.  I’m cringe so no worries, I say.  I think it’s a cool line.  I’m going to steal it for my Book.  What about drunk drunk drunk in the gardens and the graves? says C.  The last time I hung out with that punk Jacob, he had me drive to the pumpkin patch and St. Anne’s cemetery while he drank – I didn’t drink then – it was a super boring night and I could tell he was pissed off but wouldn’t say why.  Later he told me he made “that stupid song you play all the time came true”.  I never heard that story, I say.  That’s amazing.  I love you so much I don’t know how to express it, I say.  You can pull a Jacob and get pissed off and dig a grave in your backyard.  His mom then begged me to come convince him to stop.  When I did, he pulled me into the hole and kissed me.  That's how to express love for you?  That’s dumb.  I would have buried you with me.  Actually, I was trying to make you feel better about your love for me, says C.  Nothing could miss the mark more than that kid! she says.

Christina who glows loud slow: Christina who created these     Slow who Christina whom I love lust lavender haze     Christina haze horn lush lust honey who and Christina slow low loud orange     Christina ghost serpent orange jumps occult lust lush bone laughter     Christina listens slow the district sleeps alone tonight midnight ghosts

Talk to me naked     Ghost Christina clasp cross talk to me naked     Naked Christina quotation (As is usually the case with such matters, the title is outrageously misleading.  The witch is naked in only two scenes.  This is just as well though because for those scenes when she is running around with no clothes on, somebody censored the film by placing opaque streaks across it in such a way to block out the line through which the witch’s torso moves)

Talk to the naked witch’s torso moves line nonlinear     Talk witch’s torso slow who: way to be the divine will that I not leave this house empty

I walk no morning run naked and I write nude word olive oil witness     I clothe word who rhizome naked:  Christina talk to me nude descending down a staircase

I step steppe staircase spirals and I study the movement of the body parallel to the movement of the body     I study the body parallax body binary stars nonbinary god     I steep step steppe staircase descent hints a certain hell contrasted uncertain hell     Never trust a writer that doesn't burn and I burn human bodies between who and what     Who Christina cut clash clip clip cross what:  What wash walk staircase Christina naked     I sleep staircase body who crush open nude orange

I walk staircase speakeasy speech and speech springs space supernatural: metaphors  correspondences  analogies  hallucinations  pluralities  eternal recurrences

Metaphor mirror meteor molten mirage     Correspondence candle Christina who cross between what cross chiaroscuro     (Correspondence chimes Christina chimera chiral asymmetry)     Analogy anarchic logia Asia among gore urgrund god     (Asymmetrical Asia appears moth apparitions: Asia abbreviates button slug moth     Asia abbot’s sphinx moth     Asia achernon sphinx moth    Asia afflicted dagger moth     Asia asymmetrical moth analogy)     Harsh noise wall hallucinations sheer dress hallucinated airplane drag     Plural prayer panic stax records

Contraries appeal more to me than unities

Contraries chisel contraries Christina of the cross nudie-cutie cinemas

I write rhizome unity of varieties simultaneous with variety of unities     Unities obscure other unities umbra underneath rhizome written

Not rewrite it but write it     Not rewrite it but write it iron iterations     Mix tape rewrite variations physical veronica     Who veronica simultaneous screams of sounding bodies     Who sample simultaneous nude witches and I witch who, eyes gaze vibrating galaxy of suns, moons, and planets     Not rewrite but write Asia among rhizomes antelope beetles (Asia anise swallowtail butterfly     Asia american lady butterfly     Asia american idia)

Our business is not to reason and compare – but to create and burn – and make poetry, each in his own way – whatever way that is

Not rewrite it but write it     I must create a system or be enslaved by another     I will not reason and compare: my business is to create     Not to rewrite but write it     I write repeat myth and refrain gospel

I repeat body desert downtown music naked and I sin loft jazz punk no wave

Woman insatiable blots out my sin / she devours sin eater over omens my body occulted     I transmutate my misogyny into an Andy Warhol factory assembly line     I transmute my misogyny into antinomian alkahest / I hurry into godly body horror     I haste blood paste taste holy body horror     Obsessed!  Prey to creatures from the grave… Creatures who kill again and again!  TOMB OF TORTURE)     Art is the alchemical process of transformation which takes place in the furnace of the heart and mind   transform into art    transcendent use of life   utilize self

Write not write but write     Write time fuck syntax sterling sterling  sterling lobster light laboratory silver     Time involuntarily infects other time simultaneous streams of sounding bodies     I sound ben body asia rhizome jack the ripper rains

I feel there’s a great disconnect in how I feel as a friend and how you perceive me as a friend, I say to Asia.  I feel if I have a crisis or feel depression, I’m failing you as a person and as a result failing you as a friend, but it seems you perceive it differently, I say.  I see a friend who isn’t having a good time, says Asia.  You asked me how I can care for you unconditionally and what I originally said is still true, but I want to add that before you a a prophet or a writer you are a fucking human being.  A human being with a funky brain and sometimes we humans aren’t OK.  And that's OK.  When that happens we need patience and kindness, says Asia.

Before I write or prophesy, I stretto son of man     I stretch hex heart alchemies heats humans and I human always-already creative     I write and prophesy benjamin son of man simultaneous son of man cut kairos / Asia rhizome woman fucked up time     I prophesy human before god and without god immediate human (We have to live in the world even if there was no God, writes Dietrich Bonhoeffer, and this is just what we do recognize before God. […]  God would have us know that we must live as men who manage to live our lives without him.  The God who is with us is the God who forsakes us…)     I recognize without god and I live without god son of man and child of humanity: immediately I prophesy woman wilderness

I write Asia afflicted dagger moth desert diablo and I prophesy witch torso Christina naked     Not to rewrite it but I write it human prophecy and wild prophecy

Non-linearity: in the round.  Time is a ring of fire, a circle not a line.  Movement of any direction.  I wall directions at once / multidirectional wilderness

Prophesy human plunderphonics karst pornographies karst son of man     Prophesy nude witch watercolour warnings underneath

It astonishes me when the world begs and prays for places they have heard about but have not seen with their own eyes… Maybe they are praying for a place that is worst of all!

I pray something else      I pray something else something different immediate human     I pray both directions at once: continuous Christianities and discontinuous Christianities     I pray cut in desert dripping dream or diamond sea (time takes its crazy toll mirror falling off the wall you better look out for the looking glass girl ‘cause she’s gonna take you for a fall)     I pray cut into desert discontinuous deliriant / flesh discrete defoliate disappear frenzy     Cut into desert time crystal Robin dies at dawn     I pray one of three studies for a crucifixion and crucifixions cut book cloth bitches brew kairos / brew bess book bricoleur     Brew bess bitter wormwood bricolage     Bricoleur woman insatiable holy spirits sphinx flask     Sphinx flux flask both directions at once     At once ouroboros boron nitride impossible stars     Dress of dream gong: night desert deserted night

Talk to me naked     Never trust a writer that doesn't burn

I burn body busy desert dizzy up the girl     I burn storm surge scalpel slash insects insect asia ambidextrous leg segments

I burn repetition     I burn ben bodies naked witch irregular repetition     I burn one hundred dollar bank note repetition (my business is not to reason or compare but to create)     I create creature feature fat face space     I create crop circle kreb cycle burning spirals     Burn spiral spike spool sinister side cauldron

Talk to me naked (THE YOUNG NURSES   Fear, lust, thirsty passions – an explosive story of life in a big-city hospital)     Talk to me naked (The compelling story of a girl who couldn’t say no I AM A NYMPHO)     Talk to me naked (She knew an affair with her patient would be good therapy for them both!  SEX STARVED   The strange story of a beautiful, love hungry woman doctor)

Orange over oboe ossias why elephants (elephants interrupt my brain immediate boils constantly elephants)     orange open elephant graveyard and ogres congregate     Ogres orange congregate graveyard churchyard wyrd     I bury ootid otters oiled omelets (I scramble cosmic egg feminine floating eyes and floating eggs)

I walk watercolour underneath ugly minor becomes the Archangel Michael     Ursa major sails the boat Saint Peter     The congregation Andromeda opens stone round the tomb of Christ

Stars strip water underneath mask beach birdwalk wheel cave mouth

Not rewrite it but write it

Talk to me naked     Never trust a writer that doesn’t burn

Hooks Columns Cross Book Of Concealment

Content Warning: Body horror imagery


The Book of Concealment a book balanced on scales / The Book made variously formed matters different dates and speeds     Book concealed:  Book concealed Cross and Christina     Book concealed concentric circles crop circles satellite circulatory systems     Satellite settle space needle then El Saturn records / hypomanic for Sun Ra radial rays ray afrofuturism and p-funk / witches fatten up my body     Surprise Saturn monolith lithic flake fracturing as the direct ancestor of clovis point counterpoint / renaissance canon polyphony

The Book of concealment / concealment of the Book the very pulse of the machine     Machine masochist body body without organs overflowing rat king ouroboros     I sew up my body holy spirit sadism and I sew up my eyes, my anus, my urethra, my breasts shut open shuttered closed / shuttered closed to repel ghosts     Masochist schism machined body body without organs benjamin strung up to stop the organs from working

The Book of concealment closed organs body book clipper ships     Book clips my ears, my toes, my fingers / my body concealed book knives carver catastrophes (nubile actresses… doomed to slaughter… for this wanton ways THE FLESH OF BLOOD SHOW gruesomely stained in color)

Masochist body body without organs (Throw yourself in.  Physical configuration will be.  Destroyed.  Neural configuration will be.  Preserved.  Maybe.)

I string myself up to the stop the organs from working; flayed but organs still cling to my skin; my skin scrapes then scabs over, scatter desert scurries     Desert holy spirit scatters skims my skin with shears / clock tower scissors     Clock tower scissors medusa head stone sting guillotine

String stones scorpions     String stones another horse bright red and the red wrecks seventy weeks the whip and the body     Horse bright red revulsion repulsion rent rhythm pulses / horse HORSES horses (my only criticism is that it needs more onomatopoeia, says Asia)

(According to the Musurgia Universalis, 1650, the hen makes “to to too”, while chicks make “glo glo go”)

Onomatopoeia body without organs traces ocean ouroboros

Onomatopoeia isles outer darkness crash test dummies (in speaking of a mishap involving an audible arcing of electricity, the word ZAP often used / its use has been extended to describe non-auditory effects of interference)

Outer dark desert dissonances / my body details deconstructions     My tongue traces torso and torso traces tongue (… because there, nothing but traces, embryos of discourse, the book articulated and the word given free rein word free rain free jazz)

The Book of Concealment / The Book of Revelation reveals concealed and conceals revealed (What's my Book about? I ask Christina.  An evolution of revelations.  What do the revelations consist of?  What God reveals to you.  God left me though, I say.  The Christian god left me, so who is it that reveals?  What is this thing revealing to me?  Well you and I may disagree, says C.  I do believe you were a conduit.  And even if you feel God left you doesn’t mean He won’t still use you.  He’s… a bastard, says Christina)

The integral but unpredictable floating variations of a Calder mobile and Jackson Pollock’s spontaneity and directness in relation to the material

Revelation materials bright red red rum gin rummy antique rummages / its rider permitted to take peace from the earth so that people would slaughter one another and the horse bright red riders rider given a great sword (Outside in the distance a wildcat did grows two riders were approaching the wind began to howl)

Material     Material body without organs     Pump organ outer darkness (or physiology, dealing with the structure of the ear, anatomy of the vocal organs, and the sound made by animals, birds and insects, including the death-song of the swan) (Onomatopoeia vampire parrot perch)

My body material disintegration saturated sackcloth / bloody street strangulation     Catscratch splatterpunk shaking the pumpkin     I sprinkle the water my body prima materia metamaterials and I flex fluxus not neo-dada but but sheer sheol / Torah inscribes carbon nanotubes     Nanotubes Taryn her name     Her name secret of revelation and revelation of secret     Splatterpunk passion passagia passion     Passion passacaglia passion passion of Jesus Christ strikes stone cross / stone crucifixion cataclysm

Not the matter of myth but the material of myth     The material myth residual repetition   repetition residue     The repeat of the sonata-allegro form     Sonata-allegro from rope figurines the ninth configuration     Nine names as nine muses myth material musics     Myth melodies musics / counterpoint Christina bodies my soft belly the Cross (Terrifying!  THE CRIMES OF THE BLACK CAT     Blood curdling!  THE HORRIBLE SEXY VAMPIRE)

Feral hogtie horrors     Feral cannibal ferox a more slack body without organs     You may tie me down on the table, ropes drawn tight, for ten to fifteen minutes, time enough to prepare the instruments     Flesh fingers finger flesh the power of repetition and naming

I name more this beyond hyper hydra hypomania / hell heterotopias     Heterotopia tehom cobra triangle     Triangle tangles tehom counterpoint (the sanctus as a 36-voice canon of angels, divided into nine choirs)     Nine choir nine days for my anvil body to fall from heaven to earth and nine more to fall from earth to Tartarus

Hooks of the columns and their bands of silver     All these clasped by knots of supernal pillars, hooks of the columns, and all those below suspended from those hooks

Hooks columns cross Book of Concealment

Hooks books columns corridors Book of Concealment / Rhythm conceals rhythm     Rhythm conceals rhythm unrobed revelation

The sun becomes a disc and then a globe for its light to flow up a liquid and join up a soft luminosity and a urinary liquefaction of the sky     Eye egg testicle     Eye egg testicle tehom / hooks three for the meathook     Sun hooks my head spine haloes     Sun hooks my head holy ghost horror     Holy ghost ghost story hurries     Ghost story hamnet hamlet hatchet hammock / a side eye at my hamlet hat

Sun hooks hyperpop Son of Man / maximalist microgenres (I’m a maximalist in my creative efforts so I can’t fault anyone for making long movies without being hypocritical, I say.  When I say I’m critical of length of films that goes in both directions, he says, and is almost always a function of how well the included or seemingly missing scenes further the story.  A well told story, fiction or not, is certainly worth the time.  Your writings while long are, I find, also well worth the time taken to read, which is certainly shorter than the time you invested in the writing, he says)

Sun hooks the simultaneous phenomena of hyperpop and antipop     Hyperpop plastic maximal horrors / cosmic horror capital     Cosmic horror Yahweh hermaphrodite haruspex and she traces my intestines incendiaries and lamb of god landmines     Hyperpop play paddle puddle horror (Alien vampires have just landed from outer space… in search of the sustenance they need to survive… teenage blood!  EVILS OF THE NIGHT)

Maximal machines prima materia material dirty bombs

Maximal machine mammal molotov tinnitus     Tinnitus tiamat tintinnabuli (material mashups     Material mashups brutalist benjamin     Incomplete concrete     Incomplete concert chaos     Chaos bone spurs spit enlarged tuberosities     byzantine icon inflammation / bone blade bondage)

Onomatopoeia osaka bondage     Osaka bondage body without organs (my body smothered, sodomized, stretched then sealed tight / titan smooth bodies)

Titanomachy maximalism

titanomachy maximalism where digestion, reference, and elaboration of detail occupy a great fraction of the text     Text that tortures serpent leviathan   Text that twisted serpent leviathan     Text tack-weld tomahawk text tobacco mosaic virus     Text trades cantia canticle of canticles text traces (therefore knowing that they can never know what is authentic and inauthentic, attempt to include in their fiction everything belonging to that age, to take these authentic bad inauthentic things as they are with all their uncertainty and inauthenticity included…)

Text twice trace taste text tarantism     Text twice teases text torso traces text impressed into my torso thick taste / tommyknocker tenor saxophone improvisations     Eye impact improvisation / impact crater cranium     Linear (melodic) improvisation stacked text taste taxis vertical (harmonic improvisation)     Texts improvises my body-in-flux transhuman text / text human traces     Text human traces trail tool steel compositions

The Chymical Compounds The Church of God With Signs Following

The chymical compounds the church of god with signs following and the church of lord jesus with signs following, and I handle serpents son of man I handle serpent son of man and drink his venom transubstantiated into his semen and the seed salamanders mustard multiple I host Holy Ghost People and the ghost grafts christ copperhead

Periodically I had written to you about the idea of Christ and the Cross becoming a kind of revealing not only to modern humanity, but to archaic humanity as well, and Christ is truly s a kind of Primordial Human and Archetypal Human. I was writing this week, and I had a revelation (this time an intuitive or intellectual revealing rather than a visual vision or vision in the imagination) about the animal. I had been studying some interesting discoveries regarding Neanderthal cave sites. One site has a larger discovery of cave bear bones, and another site had an arrangement of twenty bear skulls in a circle. There was theorizing that these showed evidence of a Bear Cult and Bear Worship, though the idea doesn’t have much clout today in the archaeological world. However, it was a seed for inspiration in my writing. I had the thought: if Creation, including the animal, is truly going to be reconciled to the Divine Godhead, how does this come about? We are reconciled as humanity through the message of the Gospel, and we enact the Gospel and live the Gospel in ourselves to bring about the Kingdom of God. What about animals? I wrote that Christ came also as a car bear and taught to the cave bears a gospel appropriate for the cave bear, and they too were reconciled to the Godhead through a kind of Gospel, in which they could understand and in which they could apply. It also correlates to the thought I have been having lately about anarchy and the idea of a flat or non-hierarchical structure. John Cage and Merce Cunningham collaborated on many music / dance projects together. They wrote the music and choreography separately, often using chance operations (using for example, the I Ching or star charts), and did not synchronize the parts, but let the parts co-exist. Merce Cunningham described his choreography as, people doing their own thing together. I feel the Kingdom of God is a kind of like that – there is no power structure, perhaps not even God (a radical thought) as the head, but a flat structure, where we all are Christs living out the full potential of the kergyma for us as Christs. If this is the case, the powerless structureless structure negates our dominion over the animals. We co-exist as animals with animals. We co-exist as animals with animals, and we speak to each other doing our own thing. I’m reminded of St. Francis of Assisi preaching the gospel to the birds. I talked to Asia about this, and I asked her, do you think Christ came to the animal, to the cave bear? Do you think there’s a messiah for the animals? She replied, the animal is the messiah for us. I asked her, what do they teach us? She said, how to be. That radical reversal of the animal being a messiah for us is something I’m still thinking about.

When concealed of all concealed verged on being revealed, it produced at first a single point, which ascended to become thought Thought traces text a theurgy and I write ritual I write rapture in real and the single point punctures plane intersecting plane the transforming witch Witch five alligator wests magick and her abdomen glyphs god before god or god after god Concealed of all concealed stelas the transformed jaguar and the concealed haloes handaxe crocodile Christ emerges from mammoth mist the crocodile and I conceal myself nude-world half-alligator half-jaguar Ben Sira warns, you shall have no business with secret things, and I soak in the secret I bathe blue birth concealed of all concealed the concrete chymical Christ Secret suggests serpent: secret sisters snake and I handle sidewinder switch the single pint into Palm Tree Garden Secret three sororities sonars symmetry asymmetry anti-symmetry, for you died and your life is hidden with Christ For every one with fire shall be salted and every sacrifice with salt shall be saved Salt secret summons sorcerer or shaman and I descend to the subterranean serpent or throne YHVH Taryn

All Is Concealed As Before

Once a human being questions and searches, contemplating and knowing rung after rung to the very last rung – once one reaches there: What? What do you know? What have you contemplated? For what have you searched? All is concealed as before Rung after rung to the very last thing: ladder lighthouse laboratory Rung after rung to the very last rung: ritual rabbit rhythm and I re-enact erotic earth the eschaton orgasm Rung runners ritual and the ascent is the descent, the radius of the merkabah mystic, and thorn is throne, a crown of throne totentantz Taryn I rain rung rubble and ladder curved circular ruins The rung rotates reflects around the river of my body, and my body rotund reaches rung revealed rung Every rung reveals the beginning which is no beginning but the rupture rhizome or the rhizomic rupture The rung rises to rung and rung bereshits refuge and the rung repeats and revises rung Rung repeats bereshit, every moment a beginning, a beginningless beginning, and every rung rhizomes the ran reticulation of beginning / the beginning of the gospel of Jesus Christ, the Son of God The beginning bodies birds and the birds pick bone, vineyard vulture blues The beginning baths the boat over chasm or chaos, and Abyss bayous rung after-rung my blue nude body / the cock is holy the testicles are holy the cunt is holy body rung after rung The cock is a rung, and I climb cock after cock, the divine devil body, and my Christ collects the cool nude nudging my body pornographic, and the graph green directs God ruach rhizome The porno or penis prays cock macrocosm and every body is a beginning Body begins beguiles bewitches apocalypse the grotesque body, and the maximal body emits macrocosm / cosmos as transmission or cosmos as Taryn Symmetry Transformations Cosmos transmits pornographic pantokrator and God guros stone or rock psychosis My psychosis prophecies What Who Woman and her What mints wedge apocalypse (What should the goal be for contemporary prophets and messengers of truth? I ask Asia. To shut the fuck up and listen. What am I listening to? The world around you. What is the world saying to you? Am I a prophet? Yes. You are like Mary Magdalene, the Apostle to the Apostles. You prophesy to me. How am I like Mary Magdalene? She was the first witness to the Resurrection and she told the message of the resurrection to the disciples. You are my teacher. You are teaching me prophetic truth. I am not a mythical character and the only reason Mary Magdalene was an “apostle” was because the men couldn’t be bothered to take care of the grave. You think Mary Magdalene was a mystical character? She has become mythologized. Sure. That’s the nature of being human. We make myth. Of course we can de-mythologize her, which may get us closer to the historical her, but the myth is not less important than the history. The history and myth are the same thing – there’s no way to know most of the details so we fill in the rest. Someday someone will fill in your rest of your life. Someone will in the rest of my life. That's how we tell stories. You can’t tell me that my life will just be mythologized as a follower of Jesus who was a somewhat potential figure in the holy text of one of the world’s dominant religions. I mean all lives are like that, no? Reconstructed after the fact. But also, no, it wouldn’t surprise me if you were a prominent figure in a holy text someday. It would be very ironic. I will haunt you. Why would you haunt me? You’re implying it would be my fault somehow. I can’t have a bunch of assholes praying to me, says Asia Rain) I’m not part of history, says Sun Ra. I’m more a part of the mystery which is to say my story Story signals mythic music, transmission cosmos and cosmic body, and as story, I become the Cave Bear Messianic or the snow row reindeer Row root rhizome mangles mystery and row gardens / alto saxophone architecture The architecture halls anarchy and music entras sound soil soliton solutions Woman wavelets what and who and every song I write tells a story – a story that humanity needs to know about In my music I speak of unknown things, impossible things, ancient things, potential things, and Sun Ra appears to me in Saturn Dreams monolith or monstrosity, an alien minotaur spelling or speaking the chant Alpha and Omega gnosis Sun Ra gives me dreams a horn mystery and antler mystery, and this bone mallets marimba xylorimba xylophone / sabre dance danse macabre mystery Sun Ra knows gnosis apocalypse, the disclosure of secrets and secrets garden rung rhizome zone zebra zohar – that is to say, Babel Brilliance I question and search John Coltrane or the Sun Ra Bereshit, and the text expands and ascends to its source, and source splinters source the scivinas library and library outer spaceways incorporated Rung after rung to the very last rung, the Sator Revival or a major triad with one wrong note notates Yahveh’s name and the name anarchic or animistic moves margins magick Woman in margins arches asymmetrical or the written mathematics inscribes the female body nude God’s gaze gardens Eva’s intercourse with the Serpent God’s gaze candles my cock a rung into mystery’s mouth and the prick sometimes penetrates planar pornography The prick pulses porno surface, the smooth skin of God’s Kingdom, and kingdom exudes eros almost as the excess of excrement, Earth’s entirety The light-shrouded Christ says to me, aren’t you familiar with this figure? I familiar myself with Christ’s figure through Woman, and naked Taryn masturbates to orgasm for me The Written exploits Woman, and I exploit Taryn or Asia an exploitation film (I learned something yesterday, says Asia. Some people who leave Christianity and are recovering develop a blasphemy fetish. They get pleasure from performing sacrilegious or leading others to sin. So when I say I want to wrestle God and submit him, that’s my blasphemy fetish? Interesting. Freud would call that reaction-formation, and maybe Hegel would call that antithesis to the thesis. There was a subreddit about it in /exchristian. They talked about visiting their hometown, finding the ‘holiest’ people in the church and seducing them (man or woman). Other people talked about having sex in a church or on an altar. Damn, I need to find some devil dude to seduce me… Or roleplaying as priests or nuns. There’s a genre of exploitation movie called Nunsploitation which is about breaking that sacred barrier with sex and violence. It’s a little profound… Taking something that is used to oppress you and stripping of its power, says Asia. Hegel would say the Abstract and the Concrete – I forget what he calls the synthesis or sublimating of the negating the negative or whatever opacity and occultation required of it In any case, I exploit woman and the Written presents a problem, a God Gaze or the Son of Man stares Woman stripped stone scandal and Christina and I listen to Glassjaw’s Everything You Wanted To Know About Silence, a problematic record with rampant misogyny The misogyny mirrors me and I gaze as God the gape gap gehenna woman

Universe pulled from sleep together with words – at every age of the book, a dawn separates out the leveled forms Word ushers universe and the universe uncut cicumfesses word Word usurps Universe and Universe unties semantics and syntax, the serpent saddled convex corduroys Word Word wounds universe and universe umbers Wheat Woman and Word Barley Benjamin and I harvest universe unzipped The upper universe unfixes the lower universe, and my Book Body pulls from sleep Serpent Time and Serpent Tincture, oxylene alchemy The upper universe unpins lower universe from its rebar, Book Body borderless serpent The sanguine serpent sows salt seams, the pit viper in her hems / the cock is holy the cunt is holy the ...